The Stupid Joke Thread
 

(DISCLAIMER: ANY REFERENCES TO A "MOM" ARE HYPOTHETICAL"

YOUR MOM IS SO FAT...

YOUR MOM IS SO FAT SHE SAT ON A BRIDGE AND IT FELL

YOUR MOM IS SUCH A LESBIAN YOU HAVE TWO MOMS (LOL)

YOUR MOM IS SO FAT SHE DIED OF A HEART ATTACK

YOUR MOM IS SO FAT WHEN SHE STEPPED ON A SCALE IT SAID "EEEE"

YOUR MOM IS SO FAT SHE WENT TO RICHARD SIMMONS AND HE HAD A HEART ATTACK.

SHUT UP ROBO >: GOD, QUIT GAYING UP THESE THREADS >:

:rolleyes

Hey look I have some jokes:

What's brown and sticky? A stick :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

What does a 90 year old woman taste like? Depends :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

What did the cow say to the masked robber? Moo :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

How did they find out Princess Di had dandruff? THEY FOUND HER HEAD & SHOULDERS IN THE DASH :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other muffin "It's getting kind of hot in here and the other muffin says "OH MY GOD A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!!!!!!!!!" :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks him, "Excuse me. Do you have problems with shit sticking to you fur?", and the rabbit replies, "No sir. I do not.", so the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit. :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

What do you call a nervous cow? A milk shake :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey horse, why the long dick"? :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

Have you ever had an australian kiss? Its like a french kiss, but down under, if i am not mistaken :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

Did anyone hear about the new color of paint? It's called "Blonde". It's cheap, not too bright and spreads easily. :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

Why did the chicken cross the road? To have sex with the pidgeon. :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

Did you hear about the agnostic, dyslexic, insomniac? He stayed awake all night wondering if there really was a dog. :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

What did the farmer name his very clever pig? Cunningham. :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

Minnie Mouse screamed at her analyst: "I didn't say Mickey was crazy! I said he was fucking Goofy!" :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

There are three types of people in this world: Those who can count right...and those who can't! :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

Two mushrooms walk into a bar. Bartender says, we don't serve mushrooms in here, are you two mushrooms? Mushrooms say, no we're just two fun guys! :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

A leprauchan walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants, and the bartender says "doesn't that hurt?" and the leprauchan replies: "Aye, its drivin' me nuts!" :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

What do do blondes and the bermuda triangle have in common? They both swallow alot of sea men :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

What do you get when you cross the Atlantic with the Titanic? Half way :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing, they're both stuck up cunts. :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

NEW HAVEN, Conn. (AP) - A bomb exploded in an empty classroom at the Yale University law school Wednesday, sending debris flying and students scrambling for safety. No injuries were reported and the damage was minor.


:rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

Fuck you Kon, those jokes are funny. >:

A tornado ripped through Last Stand Cemetary last Sunday. Thousands died. :/

What's gay and has spots all over?

ROBO's ass!

Who makes shittier jokes than I do?

RETRO KAT :D

OMG i think my heads gonna explode from all these bad jokes......

DTH
JOHANNAS

How about some funny ones?
One of my female friends sent me this serie:

He said.......She said!

He said . . . I don't now why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to
put in it.

She said . . . You wear pants don't you?

**********************
He said . . . Shall we try swapping positions tonight?

She said . . . That's a good idea - you stand by the ironing board
while I sit on the sofa and fart!

**********************
He said . . . What have you been doing with all the grocery money I
gave you?

She said . . .Turn sideways and look in the mirror!

************************
He said . . . Why don't you tell me when you have an orgasm?

She said . . . I would but you're never there.

********* ***************
On a wall in a ladies room . . . "My husband follows me everywhere"

Written just below it . . . " I do not"

************************
Q. How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it
take
to do the dishes?

A. Both of them.

***************************
Q. Why did the man cross the road?

A. He heard the chicken was a slut.

***************************
Q. Why don't women blink during foreplay?

A. They don't have time

***************************
Q. What do men and sperm have in common?

A. They both have a one-in-a-million chance of becoming a human
being.

*****************************
Q. How does a man show that he is planning for the future?

A. He buys two cases of beer.

******************************
Q. What is the difference between men and government bonds?

A. The bonds mature.

********************************
Q. Why are blonde jokes so short?

A. So men can remember them.

********************************
Q. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?

A. We don't know; it has never happened.

********************************
Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and
good-looking?

A. They already have boyfriends.

*********************************
Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every
night?

A. A widow.

***********************************
Q. Why are married women heavier than single women?

A. Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.
Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

**************************************
Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in
common?

A. They're married.

************************************
Man says to God: "God, why did you make woman so beautiful?"

God says: "So you would love her."
" But God," the man says, "why did you make her so dumb?"

God says: "So she would love you."

WHY ISN'T RAY CHARLES ALLOWED TO DRIVE?

HE'S BLACK. :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

YOU MEAN YOUR LESBIAN MAN-HATING FEMALE FRIEND?

No. She is one of my man-LOVING female friends. She just has a certain appreciation for gender provoking jokes.
I gave her a few too, like this one:

1. How do you make a womans brain look like a pea?
- Blow it up and paint it green.

2. How are women like buses?
- There will always come another one.

3. How are women like toilets?
- Either they are occupied or they are full of shit.

Why can't Helen Keller Drive?

Because she's a woman.

That is Kon's joke on Stripcreator :rolleyes

http://www.stripcreator.com/view.php...=kon&ID=139322 >: >: >: >: >: >: >:

:rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

Why can't Retro Kat tell a joke?

Because he's busy stealing jokes from me :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

;) ;) ;) ;)

why is this thread gay?

Kon posted in it.

Why is this thread gay?

Because "NIGhtMAre" (aka "NIGhtMAre the fag") has secks with men in the ass :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

Seriously you guys what a gay he is, am I right or what? :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

You're right AND what :rolleyes :rolleyes :rolleyes

LOL RIGHT WHAT A GAY FAG!!

KON'S JOKES MADE ME QUITE LITERALLY LOL HOW HILARIOUS!! :)

Hey Robo a thing just got invented it's called AIM why don't you try using it some time? :rolleyes :rolleyes ;rolleyes

Where are you Kon :(