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-   -   FORUM EVENT: "I-MOCKERY'S FIGURE OUT A NEW USE FOR A TENTACLE ARM CONTEST!" (http://i-mockery.com/forum/showthread.php?t=69699247)

Mockery Mar 16th, 2008 03:42 PM

I-Mockery's latest forum contest has arrived!

This has got to be one of the most unique items I've ever had the pleasure of giving away for a forum contest and I hope you'll all have a fun time competing for it. This brand new Tentacle Arm from Gaia Online is being offered up to one lucky winner. You can learn more about the Tentacle Arm in this blog post.

For this contest, we want you to show us what uses you would have for a tentacle arm. And no "tentacle rape" is not a valid entry.

In order to be eligible for one of the prizes, you must create some kind of artistic rendition for your entry to count. Feel free to use any pre-existing graphics/photos to integrate into your artistic rendition. You can do a simply cartoonish rendition in MS Paint, a Photoshopped collage or whatever you like. Also, make sure you explain your new use for the tentacle arm

Here's on example of a new use for a tentacle arm:

The Best Christmas Stocking EVER.

Obviously, since you don't own the tentacle arm yet, you can't take photos with it, so that's why I'm suggesting you do some simple MS Paint drawings (or MS Paint equivalent for you Mac users out there). Still, if you need a decent image of the tentacle arm on it's own to use in a photoshopped image, CLICK HERE.

As usual, this contest will be judged on creativity and humor.

If you have any questions still, feel free to ask.


-One (1) lucky winner will receive a brand new green Tentacle Arm with suction cups galore!


-To participate, you must register an account on these forums (if you don't already have one) and post your entries in this thread.

-Once the contest is over, myself and the other staff members will vote on the entries!

-Entries will be judged on creativity and humor.

-You MUST come up with a *new* use for a Tentacle Arm and demonstrate it by making a simple drawing in MS Paint (or the Mac equivalent), or Photoshoping some images together.

-No "tentacle rape" entries please. We get the joke and it's hilarious.

-If you need a photo of what the Tentacle Arm looks like alone, check here:

-Whether you win or not, your entries will be put on display for everybody to enjoy.

-Enter as many times as you like!!!

Ok that's it. If you have any questions, feel free to ask. Good luck to all of you and start crankin' out those new Tentacle Arm ideas!

This contest ends 4/1/08.

RaNkeri Mar 16th, 2008 05:11 PM

Use as a cult icon - because Cthulhu is a pussy!

ceti Mar 16th, 2008 08:28 PM

You could use it for a pylon to caution people of danger.

ceti Mar 16th, 2008 08:37 PM

Guess a picture would help eh?

Copper Mar 17th, 2008 01:07 AM

Fastest 52-pickup win ever!

(Okay, I admit I suck at photo editing, but you get the idea...)

g_tonttu Mar 17th, 2008 06:52 AM

Simple answer...one can use it to crush ones enemies!

rorozero Mar 17th, 2008 11:44 AM

Plot twist
(Not very good at photo shop/paint etc.....)

RaNkeri Mar 17th, 2008 01:31 PM

To impress the opposite sex

Troubleshoot Mar 17th, 2008 01:53 PM

No drawing Ability+ Ms Paint+ Laptop Mouse= High quality art shown below. With that being said I'm glad this contest is based on the idea and not the quality of the drawing of the idea.

- Stretch out the fabric where the opening is and wear it like a wizard hat. Claim to be a Cthulhu summoner.

- Glue magnetic balls to the suction cups and become to LAMEST super villain ever by stealing all the paper clips/staples in your office or home.

- With the above idea, you could try to catch a bullet (Not recommended)

- Put CDs on the suction cups and try to create a budget solar powered death ray, Perfect for staying inside all day on a nice day.

hanks to executioneer for saying how to upload pictures.

More once I get photoshop up.

Mockery Mar 17th, 2008 02:20 PM

You don't have to use MS Paint to create your example, use any kind of art program you like. For any entries to count they MUST include a drawing or photo-manipulation of some kind.

Aura Fox Mar 17th, 2008 03:45 PM


Need I say more?

Yaanu Mar 17th, 2008 05:21 PM

My idea, created with Flash and a bout of insomnia. Would have finished earlier, but I forgot to save rapidly and then Flash crashed.

Includes two examples of how it could go down.

(click the link to view it)

EDIT: Thanks, Mock, didn't know that.

I just want to note, if you notice the copypasta within, my explanation is that since it crashed, I was pretty much in a rush and wanted to get it done. Hence, Ctrl C, Ctrl V.

Marthaeus Autolykos Mar 17th, 2008 07:42 PM

The idea which first came to me involved the use of the tentacle to enable the flinging of http://www.rubbersuitstudios.com/ptcct.htm this tract at unsuspecting passers-by.

jared Mar 17th, 2008 08:01 PM

I've been workin' on these contests for six, seven, maybe twelve years and the best I ever got was a runner-up acknowledgment.
But don't fall for the kitten gimmick. He gets into the catnip and then he goes crazy. He's killed and mutilated a dozen hookers all over Texas. He killed Julius Caesar. He taught Mao everything he knew. He wrote episodes of Dallas.

EDIT: Wait, I think I'm overestimating the audience. It is implied here that if I lose the contest, the stool will be removed and the kitten will be hung on the tentacle. Since tentacles are muscle-masses, the addition of the stool is just for dramatic effect. I really regret having posted this, but I'm not going back on it now. I mean, I really regret it, because it's dull and it just doesn't work, dramatically or comedically. I'm sorry. I.. I'll do better. It says I can post more above. It'll be alright.

EDIT: Another edit for the extraordinarily stupid. The new use for the tentacle is hanging kittens. Or hanging anything you like, really; live your own lives.

Invisible Mar 17th, 2008 08:51 PM

Dontcha hate those annoying 'bring your kids to work' days?
Especially when you're a skyscraper window washer?
Fret not...I have the ultimate solution!
(Please hold your applause until the end)

Presenting....The Tentacle Arm Baby Cozy!!

Safely keep an eye on your precious little one while the breeze on the 90th story and the comfy soft material of the Tentacle Arm Baby Cozy lull him/her to sleep.


Aura Fox Mar 17th, 2008 09:16 PM

I think Link could use a makeover and get a way better hat.

Roggs Mar 18th, 2008 12:08 AM

I'd like to echo Troubleshoot's request for info on how to post pictures/images in the forum. Also new, don't know how.

executioneer Mar 18th, 2008 12:18 AM

put up a picture on say photobucket
use the "insert image" button and enter the url for wherever the picture is at

jared Mar 18th, 2008 12:54 AM

If I understood the theme correctly, this is supposed to be new uses that I or any normal human could do using the particular prop of the tentacle-arm--correct?
Well, then I completely missed the boat with this...

Tentacle arms can be used to survive airlock disasters aboard spaceships.

brianz1407 Mar 18th, 2008 04:38 AM

I am not artistically gifted, to say the least, but I really want that damn thing.

You can wear it instead of pants, because, really, who likes to wear pants?

RaNkeri Mar 18th, 2008 05:36 AM

In case there are people like me who don't know how to use / don't have access to PhotoShop, I was able to talk one of my geek friends into ripping the tentacle out from the original picture.

You're welcome

Creepy-critters Mar 18th, 2008 09:07 AM

Stand out in the crowd! Make sure you're noticed!

Be the life of your next party! Sacrifice vision for fashion!

Roggs Mar 18th, 2008 01:25 PM

Damn it, for some reason it comes up as a link instead of an image, even though I'm entering the info into the image button and all.

executioneer Mar 18th, 2008 04:24 PM

post the link then, i guess

Tadao Mar 18th, 2008 08:35 PM

I would use it to reduce ileagal imigration.

MysticJoJo Mar 19th, 2008 03:59 AM

Here's my entry!

Captain PirateFace Mar 19th, 2008 05:35 AM

I would use it to pimp slap my wife with when she gets out of line….

and then pull it over my head...

for the severe Italian beating I would get soon after from her.


RaNkeri Mar 19th, 2008 05:55 AM

To spank the shit out of kids and scar them for life

nomistakinit Mar 19th, 2008 07:37 PM

Octopus Revolution!

Sexual Revolution?

stonewar Mar 20th, 2008 11:03 AM

NOt Creative...just honest. I know that's how I would use it.

Protoclown Mar 22nd, 2008 11:45 AM

There are some great entries so far, guys. Several of them have made me laugh out loud.

ChicagoDrew Mar 22nd, 2008 07:00 PM

Stupid wind!

Dommin Mar 23rd, 2008 06:25 AM

#1: Creep the shit out of the mailman.

#2: Fixing your broken Cthulhu.

#3: Best. Thimble. Ever.

#4: Pimp out your local Rhinoceros.

Obscurus Lupa Mar 23rd, 2008 11:31 PM

Spider-man can use them when one of the various Spider-man villains steals his powers or he just doesn't give a shit anymore.

Pub Lover Mar 24th, 2008 01:12 AM

What will actually happen to the tentacle if I win it.

Uncle_Sham Mar 26th, 2008 01:13 AM

but i think it would work as a very efective condom
bear with me people i have no photoshop skills so try and imagine that this is a very low budget infomercial with jack lalane
Why would this work you might ask?
take a look at these not very interesting points!

1) have you ever tried to do it while sky diving? dosent work very well because you have to hold on to your partner and thus resulting in you not opening your parachute and succuming to death by falling. No with its mighty super adhesive suction cups you can stay firmly attached to your partner without dying!

2) Lost all intrest in sex? not as fun as it used to be? tis new tentacle condom will sure put a smile on her face! it will add spice to the bedroom like youve never imagined! buy five and you can wear then on your arms and legs and you will be fucking from the ceiling in no time!

seriously, thats all i got

executioneer Mar 26th, 2008 01:24 AM

this is a picture contest, dude

inzanezanster Mar 26th, 2008 03:37 PM

my girlfriend, seen in photo, is a stewardess for air france. the octopus arm would make her flight service much more efficient...serving an entire row drinks, for example, all with one arm would save her a lot of time...time which she could devote to other duties such as cleaning up barf when passengers get air sick and miss the bag....or patrolling the bathrooms and watching for passengers who are using them to become members of the mile high club (sex in bathroom) while someone else is waiting outside and ready to pee in their pants. No greater use for such an arm is there than this...vote now and vote often....lol.

<a href="http://s225.photobucket.com/albums/d...t=0482916c.png" target="_blank"><img src="http://i225.photobucket.com/albums/d...R/0482916c.png" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

nomistakinit Mar 28th, 2008 10:48 PM

The newest dance craze that's sweeping the nation!

Dungeonbrownies Mar 29th, 2008 03:58 AM

Yes I lack the photoshops [old one wont work with my new vista pc =[
but my mind's still sharp, so i got some practical uses.

RaNkeri Mar 30th, 2008 06:13 AM

To save girls from tentacle monsters

inzanezanster Apr 2nd, 2008 09:20 AM


executioneer Apr 2nd, 2008 11:33 AM

man you are impatient

Mockery Apr 2nd, 2008 01:56 PM

Yeah, hold on. We're still waiting for two of the judges to chime in with their votes and then the winner will be announced.

rise1revolt1 Apr 2nd, 2008 03:52 PM

The suspence!

Aura Fox Apr 2nd, 2008 05:19 PM

Man I hope I win, my arm's cold.

Invisible Apr 2nd, 2008 07:27 PM

Good luck to everyone!! I hope I win so I can use the tentacle arm to put on my car antena and never lose my car in a parking lot ever again!

D'oh! That would have been a good entry! *slaps forehead*

Yaanu Apr 3rd, 2008 06:10 PM

Is there going to be a front page announcement or something? Or will the winner quietly walk away as the cover-up story is published world-wide?

Mockery Apr 3rd, 2008 06:41 PM

The announcement will be here in the contest thread just like with all of our contests. Still waiting on one judge to chime in. Thanks for being patient!

Dungeonbrownies Apr 3rd, 2008 08:44 PM

oh gosh, not me fosho, i just wish my old computer didnt get that fatal hd error, then i'd have had my photoshoppery still ahhh... =[

Marthaeus Autolykos Apr 3rd, 2008 10:37 PM

Irresponsibility of this sort is intolerable, and should be punished, like in a video of this tardy judge being spanked and uploaded here for all to bask in the shame.

Mockery Apr 3rd, 2008 11:24 PM

Keep your sexual spanking perversions out of our innocent tentacle arm thread, Marthaeus.

Now there's something I probably won't ever get to say again.

Tadao Apr 4th, 2008 12:07 AM

I want to win so that I can give it to pub. I know he'll use it all the time.

Fat_Hippo Apr 4th, 2008 01:45 PM


Originally Posted by Mockery (Post 544831)
Keep your sexual spanking perversions out of our innocent tentacle arm thread, Marthaeus.

Now there's something I probably won't ever get to say again.

Is this giving anybody else ideas?

inzanezanster Apr 4th, 2008 03:22 PM


executioneer Apr 4th, 2008 03:50 PM

you'd think this thing was made a gold the way you guys act


Mockery Apr 4th, 2008 07:13 PM

Ok you rabid cephalopod fanatics, the votes are finally in and your winner is.........


Congrats on your win, Invisible! May your new tentacle arm prove to be a great caddy for your future hellspawn.

While there was no 2nd place prize for this contest (we only have one tentacle arm to give away), I do want to give credit to the runner-up:

"Creep the shit out of the mailman." -by Dommin

There may have not been a runner-up prize, but I'll be happy to send you some free I-Mockery stickers if you want. Just drop me a line.

Also, MysticJoJo clearly put a lot of effort into that comic entry, so kudos on a job well done. Same deal goes for you, if you want some freebie stickers, just drop me a line and you got 'em.

Anyway, thanks to all of you who entered the contest! We've got some more contests coming up soon, including some with truly BIG prizes, so keep your eyes peeled for 'em!

Obscurus Lupa Apr 4th, 2008 10:32 PM

Congrats to the winnder! That was definitely my favorite entry, ha ha.

Invisible Apr 5th, 2008 12:40 AM

OH MY GOD!!!!!111!!!1

Thank you so much! I vow to make good use of the tentacle arm! This is cool! There were so many cool entries. Thanks everyone!

jared Apr 5th, 2008 03:16 AM

This is awful news for Invisible's baby, however.

RaNkeri Apr 5th, 2008 03:24 AM

Damn, and I thought I actually had a chance to win this time :<
Well better luck next time.

Oh and congratulations Invisible, Dommin and MysticJojo!

inzanezanster Apr 5th, 2008 10:37 PM


Dungeonbrownies Apr 5th, 2008 11:09 PM

well, congrats, to be honest, yes he deserved it.
I almost did the same thing, but with MJ and I was going to lagel it
[so MJ's got free hands next time hes on the balcony]
But yes, now he's got it.
and next time we hear of a masked avenger saving someone from a frire with a mysterious tntacled arm.
we know who it is.

Invisible Apr 6th, 2008 12:28 AM

LOL! Well, that would be masked avengeress! But thanks so much for the congrats! Congrats to the runners up as well! :)

Dommin Apr 7th, 2008 08:33 AM

Argh! You've foiled my plans this time, Invisible!

Congratulations, though. :D

Invisible Apr 13th, 2008 02:23 AM

Well, joy reins in Invisible's household this evening as we all dance around the sacred "Tentacle Arm"!. My 15 year old daughter will now demonstrate the grand prize winning idea: "THE TENTACLE ARM BABY COZY!!"

I've also found that the "Tentacle Arm" is a tremendous help in pondering my next diabolical plan.

By the way: The stickers were WAY cool beans!!

Thanks for the prize. My whole family went nuts over it!

Mister P. Cat Apr 24th, 2008 09:33 AM

Cat sleepy time. Extra soft.

thepiemockmaster May 16th, 2008 09:09 PM

how about to climb up walls be a pimp with a mean tentacle slap and become TENTICLE MAN!!!!

executioneer May 16th, 2008 10:08 PM


thepiemockmaster May 16th, 2008 10:10 PM

NEVAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DOMO-KUN KILL HIM!!

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