I know you people are fat lazy turds so i sperated today's entry from the introduction so you and regain your breath, take a nap, before you went on.
Most stories begin at birth or some silly shit like that, unfortunately I can't remember anything from my childhood except i one had a garage sale when i was young. A bird took a shit on me and a bee stung my thumb and I thought I was going to die like macauly Caulkin in My Girl (one of the unintentionally funniest movies ever"
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HE CAN'T SEE WITHOUT HIS GLASSES 
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Well besides that memory, I remember the begging of the computer age. My parents got this bulky peice of shit with a blue screen and floppies bigger than most of you computer nerd's penises. We had a couple games, most of them put atari and intellivison to fucking suicidal shame. There was ghostbusters, where the final boss of the game was the Stay-Puff Marshmellowman and the holing thing you had to do his run across the screen before he foot fell on you and VOLA, you won.
Anyway, it wasn't a while longer till Windows showed up and we got Windows 3.1 at home. It had newer games such as Virtual surgeon which basic stragedy went like this.
Does it Hurt HERE
NO
Does it HURT HERE?
nope
DOES IT HURT HERE?
NO!
Prescribe Medication
(Paitent with cover over head a a toe tag, the flatline plays TAPS)
Well anyway, another product that came out where fax machines. At let me tell you, this thing DAZZELED ME, When i first saw it I thought the paper goes into the machine and travels to the other machine going miles and miles away to a far off island and transfered back to your friend, all through this little wire. Then I found out it just reads the information from the paper and sends it to there other machine. What a lousy peice of shit, and i can't tell you how many times i tried to talk to my friends on the fucking phone then hearing "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-ERRRRRRRRR-AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII" coming through his end. That freak me out more than the one time I was talking to my dad long distance and someone our lines crossed and i was suddenly talking to a girl who told me "I Can't Study With" you and my common response was " Study what, dad"
A year or two later the internet showed up at my door with AOL. With a fightening simiar screech as the fax. It connected me to what i thought was the rest of the world but was really more a gray background with a couple windows on news and a dickhead informing me about shit. I like how when I was downloading something the guy said "All Done" like when a retarded child says when he finishes coloring in a Jungle Book coloring book making Baloo bright red and drawing a smiley face on the sun in the background.
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ALL DONE![/center:43784fe2af]
Anyway, I'm still kinda pissed about that fax thing, I'm going to end it here.
THE MORAL: DON'T COPY, DON'T COPY THAT FLOPPY 
Go in Peace, or Pieces
-Mark Riddles