[Jixby Phillips]

Things I did at the wedding

1. Drank for the first time in my life- I drank half a cup of wine that tasted repulsive, felt a slight "buzz" as people say and hated it.

2. Pretended like I didn't remember the dancing scene from pulp fiction and accused the guy talking about it of lying

3. Called each table's centerpeice the most least-convincing fake puke I've ever seen (it was sand and sea shells and chocolate coins)

4. Stayed a really long time!

5. Shook a really pretty girl's hand (my favorite)

6. Got off a lot of great zingers (my second favorite)