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Dr. Boogie Dr. Boogie is offline
Funky Dynamite
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Help, I'm lost!
Old Feb 12th, 2007, 01:21 AM       
Here’s the crap that Seth got from ZBF, and that I got from Seth's eBay auction... which in a way makes it the stuff I got from ZBF:

Something about the tabloid drove my cat nuts. Perhaps his sensitive nose picked up the stench of a cheap fat kid. He hates those things.

Wowie, my birthday came early this year!

Mmm, gum. And such an expensive variety, too.

And the rest: a couple hot wheels, and a power ranger that makes a strange noise when you push its belt buckle.

Still, there is a compelling story to be drawn from all this:

Having just defeated her human counterpart, the pink ranger rests for a moment, taking a break and catching up on the latest news.

“Good lord, we’re in the middle of a Super Depression! I’ve got to find some way to escape it! I know, I’ll just steal a quick pick-me-up...”

“Haha, the gum is mine now, you peons! Oh, what’s this? The rattlesnake car wants to take a shot at me? Well go a-head!!!”

*splat* *crash*

“Ahahahahaha!! None can topple me! Not even...”

*gasp* “Oh no, I wasn’t counting on them sending in the heavy artillery! If that orange missile hits me it’ll... oh, wait. It’s not a missile at all. It’s just a cheap little fakeout. Haw haw”

“Argh, lasers! Invisible lasers from the orange thingie! ARGH, I AM DEFEATED!!!”

And so, with one final weird noise from her belt, the pink ranger was slain, and I sat down to take a look at my favorite tabloid story:

An ad for a service that sends insults you can use to your Bluetooth headset. As if you didn’t look crazy enough just talking into one of those things.

Dr. Boogie: Everything is so simple when you have a rocket launcher for an arm!