[Dixie]

To Pubbles:
The Macc Lads - My Pub
I've been going to the same pub for twenty years,
It was half a crown then to buy me beer
But they closed it down to redecorate,
They said they'd knock a wall down, change the bar round, paint the door brown,
Its going to look great
I walked in the door, couldn't believe my eyes
Every cunt had a shirt and tie,
Mirrored walls and daft plastic trees, it was a
Fun-pub-disco-wine-bar-bistro-gay-club-poofhouse-cocktail-carvery. I went to the bar to get my ale, she said: "Tetley Bitter's not for sale."
They had a fizzy lager with a German name, I said:
"You've got to be joking!"
I started choking, my voice was croaking, I turned pale.
Then a penguin grabbed me to throw me out,
You've got to dress like a twat-end to get in now,
But I've been served in here for twenty years, now its a
Fun-pub-disco-wine-bar-bistro-gay-club-poofhouse-cocktail-carvery.
What the fuck have they done to my pub?