[Zhukov]

Inglorious Basterds. It was the absolute worst thing I have seen for a long long time. Painfully obvious that he didn't have enough material or dialogue to make an entire movie, so he just works some ol' Tarantino magic and turns drinking a glass of milk into a five minute scene.

3 hours later and I didn't have a clue who half the characters were, and what their story was. I didn't care.

The brutality is meant to shock us, but it's a WWII film (thanks for ruining one of my favourite genres Quentin!) and I think the audience should be prepared somewhat - Germans shooting Jews? Get out of town! - but I know the director thought he was being as cutting edge and IN YOUR FACE as he always thinks he is. Is the disregard for an honour amongst soldiers supposed to be cool and BADASS, or is it scathing social commentary? I don't give a shit anymore.

It's a collection of suspensful scenes, one after the other, and they're really not that suspensful after the first one because the same thing happens. Good guy meets Bad guy, Good guy tries to con Bad guy, Bad guy plays along, but we all know he secretly knows too. TENSION. AGAIN AND AGAIN.

Chapter titles, bold font, pointing out who Herman Goring is just in case history buffs missed the fat, blond man in the Luftwaffe uniform - fuck off. At least get a decent looking Hitler.

My memory has begun the process of collecting all known records of this abomination, and is burning them before the Allies arrive.