[Kitsa]

Yesterday I wanted something chocolate and all we had was a bag of chocolate chips. I was planning to eat about a handful, a few chips at a time, as I was watching TV in bed. (Slovenly and decadent, I know).

So I haul myself into bed, get all comfortable with the chip bag resting on my stomach, and try to open it. It's sealed up tight. I struggle with it for a few minutes before the middle seam tears and the bag explodes, chocolate chips flying everywhere.

So then I'm grumbling, right, trying to find all the chocolate chips before they melt into the sheets and/or pillows and/or mattress. I think I've got them all rounded up and I throw them away, then give up on the chocolate chips and decide to take a nap instead.

When I woke up, the chocolate chips that had evaded capture had melted all over me, making me look as if I'd rolled in shit. How embarrassing.

Long story short, I'm never eating chocolate chips in bed again.