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ThrashO ThrashO is offline
Prepare for time warp.
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Raleigh, NC
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Old Nov 27th, 2011, 10:38 PM       
Yes, that is the girl that I'm bent out of shape about. Some days are easier than others. Despite everything she's done to hurt me, I still love her more than any girl I've ever been with.

Even though I was really hurt by what happened, she did alot of things for me while I was in a time of need, and I will always appreciate that. I have alot of great memories that overshadow any moments I've shared with anyone else, and I've accepted that it's over.

One day I'll be able to look back on those times and smile, but for now they're something that I try not to think about.

I try to think about the future. Getting in the best shape of my life, getting back into school, making more and more progress playing guitar. But honestly what keeps flooding my mind is things I SHOULDVE done. Maybe I should have just accepted the break instead of getting upset. Maybe a little time is what we needed. Instead I got pissed off, told her to get fucked, called her a whore, etc etc. And I did all of this to a girl that I have never been angry at or fought with. to a girl whose shit I never EVER went through. to a girl I never questioned about ANYTHING. This was the only chick I ever thought about marrying and having kids with. All of the partying and traveling that I wanted to do as a bachelor seemed so stupid and irrelevant at the thought of being a father and husband to a girl who was so perfect and amazing in every way to me. Which is why I couldn't understand why what happened, happened.

Maybe I was a dickhead who pushed her away. Maybe she really was just a whore. I think I'll never know, so instead of wondering about it, I'm just trying to forget it. It's working, but slowly.

If I had the chance to see her, hang out with her or talk to her again, I don't think I could do it. I would probably ignore her and hope she went away.

And no, me and elx haven't hung out yet.
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