[Protoclown]

In response to my Cloverleaf Mall Carnival Out of Nowhere piece (oh, sorry, "treatise") I got this fun email:

From: Patrick McKerral-Burnett

Protoclown: "Oh, hello. I'm a complete idiot who thinks that a rinky-dink carnival set up in a mall parking lot will be chock-full of quality goods, food and rides! Also, I think that all buildings where shootings or other killings have occurred should be condemned and torn down because they are now useless and scary, despite having cost millions to build."

Me: "You, fucktard."

So I replied with:

From: Protoclown

Good job with the grammar there, brainiac. Next time you want to insult someone without sounding like Tarzan, try removing the unnecessary comma (that's the little thing that looks like a quotation mark standing on its head) first.


- Me, Protoclown

And then:

From: Patrick McKerral-Burnett

And how do ye know that weren't the intention? Seems a mite presumptious to assume that I didn't wish to sound like Tarzan, whereas you wrote a 1500 word treatise on your own idiocy.

From: Protoclown

So it was your intention all along to sound like an idiot? Way to make that insult burn, dude. It always hurts that much more when the person insulting me comes across as a lackwit rather than someone of intelligence.

Was it your intention in this email to sound like a gay leprechaun?