[JediScum]

Those things are in salad bars all over the country. I'll eat 'em, but why? I'd rather eat real bacon.

But you're in luck. Today is the perfect day to get rid of the wretched things. Dump equal portions into 10-12 sandwich baggies, tie a knot at the top and pass 'em along to the halloween hordes. Hell, clean out the fridge while you're at it. Nothing says Happy Halloween like an 1/8th full bottle of squeezable dijon mustard or that tub of boysenberry yogurt that's been hiding in the back for about two months. Not giving out candy shows you care about your neighborhood's children's dental hygiene.