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frappez le cochon rouge
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Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: cancer
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May 29th, 2008, 04:52 PM
I give it a B-. The ending was clever. Not enough dialogue, too much description.
I had/have the same problem. Be concise with your words. Use less adjectives.
But that's my two cents. There's always gonna be an audience for someone's work just as it is, regardless of what one person thinks.
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__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jixby Phillips
Oh god fathom zero, you are revealing yourself to be completely awful
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