[Nerd]

Slitting wrists is for girls. Real men slit their throats.

Or if you want to go easy, just tie a cynderblock to your foot and push it in a lake. By the time the pain starts, it's already too late.

And don't jump off a building unless your sure someone will cover you up as soon as you hit. You don't want people looking at you when you're all gory, do you? [/reference]