[sspadowsky]

As much as I find the image of you unleashing wrath upon an unsuspecting public hilarious (strictly as a mental image), I humbly request that you spread your holiday goodwill by delivering an important message to other would-be murderers:

Please, if you are suicidal, simply eliminate yourself. If you want to eat a shotgun, kindly have the decency to do it BEFORE aiming said shotgun at innocent civilians and setting fire to their home(s).

This is my Christmas wish.

Oh, and a brand-new fully-loaded Chevy Malibu, if you can fit it in between homicides.


Love,
sspadowsky

P.S.- Seriously, eat that double-ought buckshot, but not before giving me that car. Prick.