[Aries]

Several years ago my friends and I went to a playground behind a church to get inhumanly drunk and play on the swings. The church bus was parked nearby. It was a renovated schoolbus, so the doors were easily pushed open. We used the back as a urinal. Eventually my friends decided to pants me, underwear and all. They took my undies and tied them to the bus's side mirror. One of them wanted donuts, so they jumped in the car and went to the donut shop, leaving me to wander around half naked behind a church in the middle of the night. Luckily, I found my pants and put them on before the cop showed up. Someone had called the cops and reported a drunk person wandering around behind the church. I remember falling backwards on my ass as the cop shined his light on me. Meanwhile at the donut shop...

My friend Marc decided to flirt with the girl behind the counter. Always the king of smooth, he said "hey, can I have your number?" and immediately puked all over the counter. Making a swift exit, they got back in the car and returned to the church to find me and the cop. Thinking quickly, they explained that I had just left the bar across the parking lot and called them for a ride home. I wandered around because I was simply waiting for them to show up. The cop let us all go, and I got in the backseat. Unfortunately the motion of the car made me have to puke. I couldn't roll down the window in time, so I puked in Marc's lap, causing him to puke again. The next day, I realized I lost my keys in the playground. So it was back to the church in the morning, searching the sand for my keys while horribly hungover, as well-dressed people entered the building for morning services. I never found them, but at least I didn't spend the day cleaning vomit out of my friend's car.