Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: On the border of my Outer Circle of Thought
May 4th, 2009, 09:20 PM
Santa the Pirate King
Santa decided one Christmas Eve
That he was fed up and was going to leave
He was tired of the North Pole and endless snow
And elves badgering him wherever he'd go
He wanted to travel and see new lands
Cliffs and beaches and islands and sands
To travel the world he'd never seen
This was Santa's Ultimate Dream
So he died his beard a ragged black
And stuffed treasure, not toys, into his sack
He wore an eyepatch and started to sing
"Drink up me hearties! I be the Pirate King!
Around the seas I now will roam,
The entire world will be my home!
I can feel the sun and warmth for a start
Instead of building toys that should not come apart!
I'll feel the wind and enjoy the breeze
And go wherever I darn well please!"
Thus said the once jolly old elf
Who laughed with the thought, quite pleased with himself
To further prepare for his upcoming trip
He exchanged his sleigh for a galley ship
Then he left his eight reindeer on solid land
And found himself a crew of able deck hands
"Weigh anchor! Set sails! Check the wind!" he cried
"All hands on deck! Man your stations!" he sighed
"To the seven seas, to the oceans blue,
Now set sail you swabs, every one of you!"
Now Santa's a pirate who sails the Earth
But his eyes still twinkle and he still has his girth
And you can recognize the cry he'll bellow:
"Merry Christmas me hearties! And a Yo Ho Ho!"
"I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing." "But," says Man, "The Babel fish proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't." "Oh dear," says God, "I hadn't thought of that," and promptly vanished in a puff of logic.