[Guitar Woman]

Yes

Kojima's got a major problem with "Show, don't tell," apparently, or he thinks everyone who plays his games is a retard

Honestly, I feel like one for not learning from my experience with Twin Snakes. Then again, at least shit fucking happened in that game

I don't even seem to be able to save and quit in MGS3 without having pointless, meandering Seinfeld conversations. I do not need to learn about the history of Godzilla in the middle of a Black Ops mission, nor do I need to have a scene in From Russia with Love described to me, because I have purchased a Metal Gear Solid video game which can only mean that I am a massive nerd who already knows everything about any pointless pop-culture phenomenon you care to name.

Basically what I want MGS to do is shut up and let me be a fucking superspy like it promised it would. Maybe I'll try to play the game without watching any cutscenes or listening to any of the codec chats. I basically know the plot already since /v/ has at least 5 Metal Gear threads every fucking day, so I can just make up scenes in my head in which everything is explained coherently and with a hint of subtlety.

This is the best idea I've had in a while.