[CaptainBubba]

CONGRATULATIONS ESUOHLIM! YOU ARE NOW IN A CLUB WITH SUCH DISTINGUISHED MEMBERS AS BILL COSBY, PARAS HILATON, AND CORKY FROM THAT T/V SHOW!

I THINK THAT ALL TEENAGE GIRLS SHOULD HAVE TO KEEP PRECIOUS ORE AND MINERALS INSIDE OF THEIR VAGINAS SO THAT WHEN YOU DO IT FOR THE FIRST TIME WITH ONE YOU GET PRESENTS AND SHE DIES FROM INTERNAL BLEEDING!

Seriously though ya'll. Stop it with the virginity stuff. Especially on the internet. The internet was made for things like sharing your anti-cilantro salsa recipe, making spreadsheets using excell to track the exact sequence in deciseconds to perform an unstable zerg rush, and ordering authentic Xena samurai katanas. Come on, lets get back on track.