By the time I was able to actually get home to open my package, I found that it was already open and most of what was inside had been strewn across the house by a certain retard who shall go unnamed. HOWEVER I was able to compose a short narrative from what I did get.
STARDATE DECEMBER 2006. Ever since the accieent, my former life as the marshal/ninja master of Tombstone City has become a dreary, sedentary life. I haven't even had the will to pick up the throwing stars and dispense deadly justice since.
However, I one day recieved a package from my former ninja tutor,
HickMan.
To my imense supprise, it contained a brand new set of ninja gear!
Wait, wait... "Combat Playset?" No no no. It must be a typo. I'll fix it.
THAT'S MORE LIKE IT
And this... "Mighty Dog?" Another typo. It must be NINJA WARPAINT
YES!
I immediately got to work setting myself up with my new ninja gear, determined to strike fear into the hearts of those black hat-wearing evil ninja cowboys.
What the... what is this thing? A jockstrap?
Ah, yes... no, it's too snug.
Hm.
I know! It must be a replacement headband!
(GSAP) ENEMY OPERATIVE
NO CRIMINAL WILL STAND AGAINST
JUSTICE HAS BEEN DESERVED.
(You can't really see it but in that one I'm wearing the Marshal of Tombstone badge and the jockstrap on my head. ;( )