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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 02:21 PM        My Favorite Movie Assholes
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s0n1c m0nk3y s0n1c m0nk3y is offline
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 03:01 PM       
I like how I've only ever seen three or four of those movies!
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 03:05 PM       
I personally like the sterotypical Evil German Guy from Indiana Jones and The Raiders Of The Lost Ark, the one with the weird hair and the black coat, but Bluto was an awesome choice for lead. Also, hilariously funny. I lol'ed more than six times, which is hard for the Internet to do.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 03:17 PM       
Gotta hate that Johnny Lawrence bastard. By the way, I think that one asshole you certainly overlooked is Biff Tanner from the Back to the Future series.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 03:19 PM       
Almost every movie has a certified asshole, whether they try to or not, so it can be hard to make a condensed list of each.

You can go with Chris Hargensen from Carrie, due to the fact that she caused the main character freak out dumping pigs blood on her while uncontrollably licking her lips. On the same note you can take other villains from Steven King novels, like Jack Nicholson’s character in “The Shining” or Kathy Bates character in “Misery”.

Other assholes include ones from the Indiana Jones series. My favorite would have to be Major Arnold Ernst Toht because he was such a prick and looked a little creepy in those horn-rimmed glasses.

Judge Elihu Smails from Caddyshack or Gregory Marmalard and Douglas C. Niedermeyer from Animal House are also a couple of suggestions of people that can be looked at.

You can go even into the horror genre, but I view most of the supposed villains more as heroes or simply misunderstood people that are trying to clear the world of dimwitted, horny teenagers.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 03:22 PM       
Quote:
I personally like the sterotypical Evil German Guy from Indiana Jones and The Raiders Of The Lost Ark
I see that we think alike JJ, that German guy was downright creepy!
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 03:24 PM       
If you haven't seen bloodsport then you also nust not own a TV. At any given time you can probably find it on TBS or TNT.

R.J. Fletcher & son, Richard, were a good asshole duo.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 03:51 PM       
Hey, that old dude Grand Moff Tarkin is another asshole I mostly remember for his line regarding his dismissal of the officer's adivce about the Death Star's weakness. Way to go dude, you just screwed yourself by abandoning the only chance to save your ass!
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 03:56 PM       
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You can go with Chris Hargensen from Carrie, due to the fact that she caused the main character freak out dumping pigs blood on her while uncontrollably licking her lips. On the same note you can take other villains from Steven King novels, like Jack Nicholson’s character in “The Shining” or Kathy Bates character in “Misery”.
Kathy Bates give me the creeps dude, you can't imagine how many times I failed to catch my sleep because I was fearing she would come around to break my ankles.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 03:59 PM       
There is also Principal Togar from Rock 'n' Roll Highschool. She just could not understand the awesomeness of the Ramones.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 05:13 PM       
Is there some reason we're all ignoring the genre defining asshole? General Zod.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 05:43 PM       
I nominate Shooter McGavin of HAPPY GILMORE fame.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 06:13 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Retro-Pirate View Post
Is there some reason we're all ignoring the genre defining asshole? General Zod.
Heheh, he almost made the list this time, especially since I run GeneralZod.net 'n all, but I figured I'd save him for the future... primarily, because I worry he'll kill me with his eye lasers if I talk shit about him.

Keep those suggestions coming everyone... lotta good ones so far. I definitely agree about Biff Tanner and Toht. I'll have to cover those guys in some future installments.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 06:42 PM       
Xur from The Last Starfighter! Everything about that guys screamed prick.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 07:01 PM       
What?? No Harry Flugleman?? I know he only has one scene in Three Amigos, but still, you gotta admire the fact that in one single scene, he manages to end the Amigos careers, take their clothes, their money, and their residence. That's some industrial strength asshole right there.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 07:09 PM       
Fantastic article. And it reminds me of that "asshole" song...

I'm an asshole! And Asshole! An asshole-e-yol-e-yoleeeeee....
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 07:22 PM       
General Sark of TRON and Indies Rival, Belloq would both make great Assholes. I really liked Belloq, especially his monolauge at the begining of Raiders. The Big Lebowski has its asshole right in the title. Could you include Starscream, even though he only appeared in one movie and is mostly a T.V. character?
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 08:16 PM       
Hey I-Mock (RoG, Proto, Burbank) just want to let you know you're making my Summer better. I've been enjoying the break but am bored shitless in this small town (my last year so am out early so friends are still in + work) so I started looking back over I-Mock for movie suggestions and just general humour and you've introduced me [so far] to stuff like "Falling Down" and just today "Bloodsport" awesome movies! I'll be checking back over the site for more obviously - and on this list - but just wanted to say thanks for entertaining me these past few years and introducing me to and getting great movies like these the attention and exposure they are due. Keep on with the humour because you're all awesome at it.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 08:23 PM       
Hans Gruber and Colonel Grant from the first two Die Hard movies.

EDIT: Actually, now that I think about it, Deputy Chief Dwayne T. Robinson (Paul Gleason) from Die Hard and Carmine Lorenzo (Dennis Franz) from Die Hard II are probably better choices. And I was mistaken - it's Colonel Stuart and Major Grant as the two villains in Die Harder. (I should fact check before posting <sigh>)

Last edited by Colonel Flagg : Jun 25th, 2008 at 08:36 PM. Reason: Not quite accurate ...
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 08:41 PM       
You left out the biggest asshole in the universe: Starscream. I'm not talking about his pussy ass 2007 movie version, no, I'm talking about the G1 and the new Animated version. Since the very beginning of the franchise he's been trying to get rid of Megatron and become the new leader of the Decepticons. For example, in the 86 movie when Megatron got his ass handed to him by a barely functioning Prime, Starscream threw old Megatron out of Astrotrain in the middle of space! Though he was reduced to ash afterwards during his coronation ceremony by Galvatron, I wont deny that, he was still an asshole when he died!
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 08:50 PM       
Absolutely - The Tannen Family from the Back to the Future movies - assholes from (at least) 1885 until (at least) 2015 - "Mad Dog" to Griff. Specializing in everything from name calling, bullying, attempted homicide, actual homicide, and, of course, attempted rape.
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 08:59 PM       
- and hey, what about Vernon Wells - not only did he play psycho-with-a-man-slave-on-a-leash asshole Wez in The Road Warrior - but also played the chain mail wearing to hide the paunch Bennett in Commando :P

- or Uncle Les from Braindead/Dead Alive
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 09:14 PM       
I've only seen one of those movies... I fail

I'm in complete agreement with McFly about Chris Hargensen from Carrie. But when it comes to complete assholes in movies, I always go with Harry Cooper from The Night of the Living Dead, particularly him in the 1990 color remake (at least in the original he helped a little bit. In the remake he was an unhelpful dick throughout the entire film).
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 10:12 PM       
Ooh! Ooh! I vote for Rhodes from DAY OF THE DEAD!

After the legendary "Choke on 'em!" moment, I always love to say, "Where we're going, we don't need... Rhodes."
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Old Jun 25th, 2008, 10:18 PM       
heh, bluto
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