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  #1  
Zomboid Zomboid is offline
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Old Jan 17th, 2009, 06:48 PM        I GOT SKILLZ
The other day, this BITCHIFUCKED was all "you're good in bed" and I was like "LOL I KNOW," but it occured to me that I was shitfaced when I boned her and I only vaguely remember the porn star moves I was pulling. I do remember the always effective THRUST IT ALL THE WAY IN AND KINDA WITHDRAW JUST A BIT, JUST TO LET HER KNOW HOW GIANT YER CAWK IS thing.

So, DISCUSS YOUR FAVORITE MOVES! I think this has the potential to be the most graphic loveline thread yet!

PEOPLE WHO HAVE ONLY HAD ONE PARTNER (SAM) OR NO PARTNER (MILHOUSE) NEED NOT APPLY.
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That was very funny. Well done.
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  #2  
Shrubfest Shrubfest is offline
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Old Jan 17th, 2009, 07:02 PM       
Anything that leaves bruises, bite-marks and scratches.
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  #3  
Tadao Tadao is offline
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Old Jan 17th, 2009, 08:07 PM       
I like to get him on all fours and pull him by the hair into my cock. Works well on girls too.
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  #4  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Jan 17th, 2009, 09:05 PM       
Seasawing works
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  #5  
DevilWearsPrada DevilWearsPrada is offline
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Old Jan 17th, 2009, 10:24 PM       
The scorpion deathlock.
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  #6  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Jan 17th, 2009, 10:56 PM       
That's your answer to everything.
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  #7  
MattJack MattJack is offline
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Old Jan 17th, 2009, 11:14 PM       
my favorite move is cu*ming too quick and then going to sleep.

They love that shi*.
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JANGIS KHAN
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  #8  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Jan 17th, 2009, 11:24 PM       
Passing out on top is a Pro-Move.
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  #9  
MattJack MattJack is offline
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Old Jan 18th, 2009, 12:11 AM       
One time a girl passed out under me when I was gettin after it on top.

I guess my love makin was so good that it made her go unconscious
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  #10  
Big McLargehuge Big McLargehuge is offline
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Old Jan 18th, 2009, 12:26 AM       
if a girl calls you "daddy" does that mean it is working
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s
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  #11  
Sam Sam is offline
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Old Jan 18th, 2009, 12:32 AM       
OR SHE IS RELIVING A REPRESSED MEMORY.
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  #12  
Tadao Tadao is offline
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Old Jan 18th, 2009, 03:15 AM       
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  #13  
WhiteRat WhiteRat is offline
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Old Jan 18th, 2009, 04:14 AM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by MattJack View Post
One time a girl passed out under me when I was gettin after it on top.

I guess my love makin was so good that it made her go unconscious
One time I passed out on top of a girl right before I was about to give her the peace pipe. When I woke up she was sleeping on the floor and Abyss was playing on DVD.
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  #14  
Dixie Dixie is offline
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Old Jan 18th, 2009, 05:49 AM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zomboid View Post
The other day, this BITCHIFUCKED was all "you're good in bed" and I was like "LOL I KNOW," but it occured to me that I was shitfaced when I boned her and I only vaguely remember the porn star moves I was pulling. I do remember the always effective THRUST IT ALL THE WAY IN AND KINDA WITHDRAW JUST A BIT, JUST TO LET HER KNOW HOW GIANT YER CAWK IS thing.
That's no way to talk about your mother.
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  #15  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Jan 18th, 2009, 04:28 PM       
I was going down on a girl who fell asleep. I woke her up and she was like "Wha happen?"

I told her I sung a lullaby right into her vagina.
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  #16  
Tadao Tadao is offline
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Old Jan 18th, 2009, 05:14 PM       
I was just telling someone how I like to wake girls up with my dick already in them. Yeah it's rape, but it's sexy rape.
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  #17  
Shrubfest Shrubfest is offline
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Old Jan 18th, 2009, 05:42 PM       
My kind of alarm.

Rape.
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  #18  
derrida derrida is offline
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Old Jan 23rd, 2009, 09:04 AM       
Rimming. Probably the most serendipitous of all sex acts because there's no particular "end" in mind, just free 'n' easy play and exploration. It can of course be combined with a hand job (rusty trombone), but I personally leave that matter up to the recipient. Tongue-fucking is commonly referred to as "The Devil's Gambit" due to the possibility of finding a soft brown finger poking back ala ET, the extra-terrestrial (from which the act's other appellation, the "elliot" is derived.)

PROTIP: Tracing the line of the "taint" (dogball, grundle) one finds at its terminus a small "anal clit," commonly referred to as a "Roger Corman" ("Corman" for short). This small protrusion should be given an intense seeing-to, subject to licking, sucking, and even biting.
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  #19  
Supafly345 Supafly345 is offline
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Old Feb 1st, 2009, 04:23 AM       
I fulfilled a rape fantasy by request for two seperate girls. Cock slapping their face seems very exciting to them in these situations.
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  #20  
Tadao Tadao is offline
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Old Feb 9th, 2009, 11:47 PM       
I just learned a new sex move. The roller coaster!

"to have sex with a girl from behind while her head is facing down towards the bottom of the stairs, you then proceed to punch her in the head and ride her all the way down to the bottom of said stairs. "
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  #21  
bigtimecow bigtimecow is offline
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Old Feb 10th, 2009, 12:20 AM       
gah, you might break your dick
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Bigtimecow you are like the Fonz of girls pussies.
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  #22  
pac-man pac-man is offline
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Old Feb 10th, 2009, 12:59 AM       
Stick some cardboard or a sled underneath her.
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  #23  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Feb 10th, 2009, 02:20 AM       
I wouldn't mind doing that on a crocodile mile. Show her the splash down pool....with my cock.
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  #24  
BLEU BLEU is offline
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Old Feb 10th, 2009, 01:34 PM       
Autofellatio.
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  #25  
Zomboid Zomboid is offline
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Old Feb 10th, 2009, 04:23 PM       
I wanna piss on a girl some time . Not to get off on it, but if it's a girl I really hate or something but still manage to get in the sack, I wanna pee on her.
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That was very funny. Well done.
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