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David Brent David Brent is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2006
Old Oct 19th, 2007, 05:47 PM        the couch dilemma
I have just figured out why I haven't had a girlfriend in almost two years. It is because I don't have a couch in my apartment. There have been times when I've had a lady over in my apartment after our date and we were sitting in two seperate chairs in my apartment. Thus, it's nearly impossible to put a move on her that would lead us into hot action. There we are, sitting in two seperate chairs so far apart in my apartment and it would be incredibly awkward for me to get up and walk all the way over to the chair that she is sitting in to make a move on her. I would usually wait to find a girlfriend to ask her to move in after a year or 2 of dating and bring along her couch into my apartment to spruce things up so I wouldn't have to spend on insanely overpriced ethan allens. But the problem firsthand is that I don't have a couch and I won't have a girlfriend unless I have a couch so I can put my moves onto her while sitting next to her that would lead us into hot action. So I will go to Salvation Army thrift store tomorrow to find a decent couch for under 50 dollars before my hot date tomorrow night. I will let you know how it goes.
Remember that age and treachery will always triumph over youth and ability.
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Terra Terra is offline
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Old Oct 19th, 2007, 07:40 PM       
Your Salvation Army couch will have seen far more action than you will.

If you think a $50.00 used/who knows where it's been/who knows what's been on it is the key to your romantic success, I think you might take a closer look in the mirror.
Oh fuck it
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maggiekarp maggiekarp is offline
noob 4eva
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Location: Texas
Old Oct 20th, 2007, 01:28 AM       
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Big Papa Goat Big Papa Goat is offline
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Location: Missouri
Old Oct 20th, 2007, 07:47 AM       
Get a loveseat. If it's too expensive, get a better/second job for a while. There's nothing more important than sex.
EDIT: A new loveseat, jewface.
SECOND EDIT: It's not a dilemna, you're just being a dumb cheap jewface by not buying a loveseat.
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HickMan HickMan is offline
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Old Oct 20th, 2007, 09:56 AM       
I got my couch from a thrift store and I've had COUNTLESS vagina on that piece of furniture.
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MattJack MattJack is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: The Mother F*ckin Dirty (bruh)
Old Oct 20th, 2007, 04:12 PM       
i make women stand up in my apartment. They need to always be aware of their role.
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Big McLargehuge Big McLargehuge is offline
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Location: Chocolopolis
Old Oct 21st, 2007, 01:10 PM       
if you think you can't get a rad ass piece of furniture at a thrift store, than you are goddamn crazy. And if a bitch can't get down on your dirty ass floor, she best see her way to the door.
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Guitar Woman Guitar Woman is offline
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Location: Portland, OR
Old Oct 22nd, 2007, 02:48 AM       

Why is this forum getting the shaft again? :<
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mischief mischief is offline
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Join Date: May 2003
Location: las vegas
Old Oct 22nd, 2007, 02:56 AM       
um maybe you haven't had a girlfriend because of you and not the couch situation?

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