Features

Colonel Flagg · #**81851**

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aaarg

can somebody please direct me to these "boners ahoy"

Rest in Peace.

ThrashO · #**81852**

Hey so I didn't know Pram played guitar! I saw his band play today, they were pretty good:

Kitsa · #**81853**

Don't blame it on the OCD, Pram. I get by.

Pentegarn · #**81854**

Hey Zhukov, you arrogant fuck, you are unfunny, your political views suck, and your hatred of me is a compliment cause it means I am the opposite of what you like, which are things that suck like communism and celibacy.

Also where is that boring story about how you didn't close the deal on yet another lesbian roller derby chick? I don't know what is more pathetic, the fact that you are doing the most useless job in all of history, or the fact that the one fringe benefit you might get out of it you manage to fuck up cashing in on. How long have you been trying to land trim? 2 years now? I have had relationships with emotional meaning that were shorter than that. If you are going to go for the shallow existence, you could at least be proficient at it.

Grats on landing Pram as an ally though, puts some real validity in your view of me

Thanks for the accidental compliments loser

Pentegarn · #**81855**

Regarding the Marx comment, the Marx brothers are regarded as among the greatest comedy teams of all time by many respected comedians. The joke is your comedic knowledge is so lacking that your favorite comedian is Karl Marx (who happens to be your big hero, so it is a double burn). The part where you are dumb is you didn't realize this.

Now that I have explained what should have been a pretty basic joke I will move on to mocking you more.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zhukov

No, it doesn't make sense, why would I laugh at Karl Marx? You're trying to make fun of me being a socialist, you shouldn't say I'm laughing at him you moron

What you haven't heard some classic Karl Marx jokes?

(reading these in a Russian accent gives them the full effect)

"I just flew in from Siberia and boy are my arms.... actually that is lie, nobody can be affording to fly"

"Take my wife please, I can no afford to feed her under glorious communist system filled with glorious shortages"

"Homeless comrade walks up to me and say, 'I have not had bite to eat in weeks' I say, 'of course, nobody can afford to be eating with the food shortages' "

"Homeless comrade walks up to me and says, "can you spare 50 rubles for sandwich?" I say, "If I had 50 rubles i would be in breadline for sandwich of my own"

Good stuff, no wonder you like his comedic stylings.

Pentegarn · #**81856**

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pram Maven

See, Zhukov, Pent thinks he is superior to you, even though you joined before him.

It's this sort of illogic that creates tyrrany with incompetent leaders. I, for one, am glad that you are a socialist. It's refreshing to see a different political view than what's being shoved down our throats.

By the way, I support SOCHI2014.

Yeah, when you can't fight your own battle, may as well find someone else to do it for you. Pick your allies better though cause he is actually less funny and interesting than you are.

Zhukov · #**81857**

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pentegarn

I am the opposite of what you like, which are things that suck like communism and celibacy.

W...w.. what? You are the opposite of communism and celibacy?

By the way, just a hint; celibacy is by choice, and if you are trying to say that I don't get any sex you shouldn't have said I was celibate. You fat stupid ape. As for my sex life; I'm certainly not going to keep you informed and up to date.

Quote:

Also where is that boring story about how you didn't close the deal on yet another lesbian roller derby chick?

Yeah, where is that story that you keep referring to?

Quote:

I don't know what is more pathetic, the fact that you are doing the most useless job in all of history, or the fact that the one fringe benefit you might get out of it you manage to fuck up cashing in on.

What? I work in a hardware store. The one fringe benefit is being able to cut keys for free and get all the free bolts and nails I could ever want. I have never once screwed up with cashing in on that. I steal stuff pretty much every day.

Quote:

How long have you been trying to land trim? 2 years now? I have had relationships with emotional meaning that were shorter than that. If you are going to go for the shallow existence, you could at least be proficient at it.

What? Land trim? Get fit? Are you calling me unfit you fat twat? Oh, and now you are bragging about how short your relationships with 'emotional meaning' are? Why are you doing that?

Why would you brag, with sincerity, about that?

Quote:

Thanks for the accidental compliments loser

Thanks for giving me an accidental laugh now and again, dumb head. Thanks for explaining the worst joke I've ever heard and then calling it a "DOUBLE BURN". Thanks for giving me red pickles because you actually think it will make me feel bad.

Oh, and Karl Marx was German, not Russian. That's a pretty well known fact, even for NON PINKOS.

"I dont give a shit about your crappy pinko leaders, why would I bother to learn that sort of stuff when its just going to end me up in a gulag, and also something or other suggesting that you are homosexual"

Zhukov · #**81858**

Don't blame it on 'toxic chemicals' either; it's only clay, not fucking fluoride or something.

Pentegarn · #**81859**

Wow, that was a lot of lame in so small a space.

Bottom line, you suck, and are useless as a human being.

Pentegarn · #**81860**

And you are right, i don't give a damn about accuracy when insulting your heroes. Most normal people don't focus on accuracy when making a joke, which is why your jokes suck, because you seem to want to tell jokes like Dennis Miller. Note how everyone makes fun of Dennis Miller though, because in comedy, it is funny, not facts that matter.

Zhukov · #**81861**

You are seriously mental. Most normal people don't focus on accuracy when making a joke...? What the flying fuck are you on about? We know you are more a fan of the 'scatter gun' approach to comedy, where you just post a billion moronic sentences at Pram Maven in every thread and hope you get awarded a green pickle for your efforts.

Accuracy matters when you are trying to insult me and you can't manage to find one single thing about me to make fun of. Accuracy matters when a sailor blew his load too close to your mother's bloated cunt and accidentally managed to conceive you.

Pentegarn, you fat, ugly toad of a man, go and pick a random new person to fight, you are moronic and boring, and I don't want to talk to you anymore. Twat.

PS: can a mod please delete or move all of this crap?

Pentegarn · #**81862**

If you don't want to engage, if you think i am so unfunny, why oh why, my puffed up little poppinjay, have you not chosen the ignore option?Just click my name, and hit ignore. Until you do that, you are just another whiny bitch.

But no, you instead take an unprovoked shot at me, then get all whiny and bitchy when I fire back. You are the worst kind of human. You are basically a coward and a fool who can't understand what they read, and then goes with that as a valid response to their detractors. Don't pin your stupidity on me just because things i post are over your pin head.

Pram Maven · #**81863**

Pentegarn · #**81864**

One more thing, i notice you keep mentioning pickles, you seem to have some sort of hate for the system, and I wondered for a moment why, Then it hit me, tangible evidence that I am indeed more funny than you and post more posts that people like than you must infuriate you. I understand now why you badmouth it so much, just remember though you were the one who kept pointing at them in the first place. I was content to let everyone with eyes and a brain figure that little piece of glaring testimony that basically puts lie to your whole little crusade against me. But you kept surreptitiously pointing to it. That's on you man

Pram Maven · #**81865**

Zhukov- Wow, seriously? Clay is made of petroleum. Which comes from the ground. When heated, petroleum wax becomes toxic (double boiling it releases fumes). When it is BURNT, it becomes C A R C I N O G E N I C.

Worse, some pigments in plastalina contain cyanide (cyan is not just the name of the color, dumbass).

Don't tell me the chemicals I am around are not harmful. I have been trying to make non-toxic clay for as long as I can remember and once the ingredients are hot enough, ANYTHING you put in the double boiler becomes a carcinogen when it reaches gas form.

On the other hand, please do melt some clay in a saucepan at 450 degrees and inhale deeply.*

Pram Maven · #**81866**

*especially if your name is Thrash0.

Pentegarn · #**81867**

Wow you turned on your new best friend Zhukov quickly.

Your loyalty makes me

Kitsa · #**81868**

Oh, I can't wait to see what ColFlagg has to say about that.

Now I need a dikdik munching popcorn.

edit: re the whole chemistry thing.

ThrashO · #**81869**

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pram Maven

*especially if your name is Thrash0.

I've never fisted two kids at once why would I be in possession of clay?

Shyandquietguy · #**81870**

EDIT: Pram, I'm tired of giving you hints you fucking moron.

Colonel Flagg · #**81871**

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitsa

Oh, I can't wait to see what ColFlagg has to say about that.

Christmas came early this year.

Colonel Flagg · #**81872**

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pram Maven

Clay is made of petroleum. Which comes from the ground. When heated, petroleum wax becomes toxic (double boiling it releases fumes). When it is BURNT, it becomes C A R C I N O G E N I C.

You of course are referring to Artist's Clay, which is separate and distinct from industrial clays (kaolin, bentonite) which are largely nontoxic.

The MSDS for artist's clay, which I hope you've read, shows virtually no information on the specific content of the material, outside of the binder being made from "organic materials". Looking at the paperwork, I'd suspect the exact formulation is a trade secret.

If it is petroleum wax, then, for all intents and purposes you are correct in at least one aspect of your proclamation above - burning petroleum-based products and inhaling the fumes is bad for you. So is smoking. Here's a tip - don't do either. As far as the fumes from heating go, the general recommendation is to work in a ventilated area with some kind of breathing mask. As the volatiles will condense fairly quickly, breathing through a tortuous path membrane will prevent them from condensing inside your personal space. And keep you healthier.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pram Maven

Worse, some pigments in plastalina contain cyanide (cyan is not just the name of the color, dumbass).

Very good. *gold star* Handled properly this should not pose too much risk. However, other pigments contain heavy metal compounds (Barium, cobalt, chromium, molybdenum, etc.) which can be absorbed through the skin and mucous membranes. Best you be wearing chemically-resistant nitrile gloves, son. Another tip - "nitrile" is chemistry-talk for polyacrylonitrile (PAN) which is an organic polymer of cyanoethylene - that's right, it contains cyanide!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pram Maven

Don't tell me the chemicals I am around are not harmful. I have been trying to make non-toxic clay for as long as I can remember and once the ingredients are hot enough, ANYTHING you put in the double boiler becomes a carcinogen when it reaches gas form.

What are you using as the heating medium for your double boiler? I'm guessing from the information below that you're using some kind of mineral oil (PDMS) - if so, then cancer is the least of your problems - in addition to wearing a breathing mask, you should be wearing heat-proof gloves. And not oven mitts, either, full on lab safety handwear.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pram Maven

On the other hand, please do melt some clay in a saucepan at 450 degrees and inhale deeply.

Do you cook your dinner in that same saucepan, son?

Pram Maven · #**81873**

Flagg- It's good to meet a clay expert.

This is oil-based, with several grades of microcrystalline as the binder. Thrash0, fuck off. The grease that makes the more brittle waxes stick to the marble dust and talc is petroleum jelly and the oil is mineral oil.

The heating element is either a heat gun or a stove burner; I only recently started using a heat gun because it was faster and I have not observed any health issues aside from a burning pain in my stomach and the constant need to urinate.

The two pans which make up the double boiler do not come in contact with food, except I do put wads of chewing gum in there sometimes and I've used them as an ashtray.

...this is the chat thread, don't expect a straight answer. I think it belongs in Art Shit, though.

...Dad.