Go Back   I-Mockery Forum > I-Mockery Discussion Forums > Comics 'n Books
Reload this Page Favorite Bible LULZ
FAQ Members List Calendar Today's Posts

Reply
Page 2 of 3 < 1 2 3 >
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #26  
Fat_Hippo Fat_Hippo is offline
Feel the guilt
Fat_Hippo's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Switzerland
Fat_Hippo is probably a spambot
Old May 3rd, 2008, 05:34 PM       
Did your congregation have a tendency to constantly try to convert people and to damn them to hell if they refused? Cause we have one in my town, and it has a tendency to do that.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Grislygus View Post
the Swiss are not afraid to beat their women with oversized novelty chocolate bars
He speaks truth!
Reply With Quote
  #27  
Shrubfest Shrubfest is offline
Thrills and Oblongs
Shrubfest's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: A cupboard.
Shrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty ok
Old May 3rd, 2008, 05:41 PM       
Who draws the pictures for the Watchtower magazine and other such pamphlets?
Why do they always make Jesus look like a 36 year old American suburbanite?
__________________
False teeth are startling.
Reply With Quote
  #28  
Kybo Ren Kybo Ren is offline
ni kar'tayl gar darasuum
Kybo Ren's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Cabot Cove, Maine
Kybo Ren is probably a spambot
Old May 3rd, 2008, 05:45 PM       
Why do the JW's give you a free book, and then demand it back? and when you refuse admittance to your home, they send the oldest able-bodied couple to guilt their way in?
Jokes on them, I kept their damn book- it's got pretty pictures
__________________
Urgency without Panic, Action without Thoughtlessness.
Reply With Quote
  #29  
Tadao Tadao is offline
☆☆☆☆☆
Tadao's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2002
Tadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contest
Old May 3rd, 2008, 05:47 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shrubfest View Post
Who draws the pictures for the Watchtower magazine and other such pamphlets?
Why do they always make Jesus look like a 36 year old American suburbanite?
They don't hand out the name of the artists or the writers. They don't believe that that matters.

He was 33 and 1/2 when he died. I don't see a cell phone do you?
Reply With Quote
  #30  
Tadao Tadao is offline
☆☆☆☆☆
Tadao's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2002
Tadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contest
Old May 3rd, 2008, 05:48 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fat_Hippo View Post
Did your congregation have a tendency to constantly try to convert people and to damn them to hell if they refused? Cause we have one in my town, and it has a tendency to do that.
They don't believe in hell.
Reply With Quote
  #31  
Tadao Tadao is offline
☆☆☆☆☆
Tadao's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2002
Tadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contest
Old May 3rd, 2008, 05:49 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kybo Ren View Post
Why do the JW's give you a free book, and then demand it back? and when you refuse admittance to your home, they send the oldest able-bodied couple to guilt their way in?
Jokes on them, I kept their damn book- it's got pretty pictures
This is a rumor, this have never happen that I know of. Maybe you just suck and they hate you.
Reply With Quote
  #32  
Shrubfest Shrubfest is offline
Thrills and Oblongs
Shrubfest's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: A cupboard.
Shrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty ok
Old May 3rd, 2008, 05:50 PM       
I know How old he was, which is why is confusing that he looks TOO old. I just find it weird that they makin him look like a 90's business man in a robe.
__________________
False teeth are startling.
Reply With Quote
  #33  
Kybo Ren Kybo Ren is offline
ni kar'tayl gar darasuum
Kybo Ren's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Cabot Cove, Maine
Kybo Ren is probably a spambot
Old May 3rd, 2008, 05:54 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tadao View Post
This is a rumor, this have never happen that I know of. Maybe you just suck and they hate you.
Sadly it's true. the book is:
Learn from the great teacher
2003

the pictures are great (sorry no artist mentioned)

And I may suck, sir, but I never let them in to hate me proper!
__________________
Urgency without Panic, Action without Thoughtlessness.
Reply With Quote
  #34  
Tadao Tadao is offline
☆☆☆☆☆
Tadao's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2002
Tadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contest
Old May 3rd, 2008, 05:59 PM       
This is a comedy sight and I am drunk. Why else would I admit to being a JW in the pass. I kid, I kid. I hope doesn't mid that I have derailed the thread somewhat.
Reply With Quote
  #35  
Kybo Ren Kybo Ren is offline
ni kar'tayl gar darasuum
Kybo Ren's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Cabot Cove, Maine
Kybo Ren is probably a spambot
Old May 3rd, 2008, 06:04 PM       
Let's get a fake Mormon in here- maybe they'll answer my mormonic questions.
the real Mormons wouldn't answer all my questions until I did their 2 year work slavery program.


and to stay on thread: Read Ecclesiastes! It's great for wisdom (quoted in "Renaissance Man") and it speaks badly of women
__________________
Urgency without Panic, Action without Thoughtlessness.
Reply With Quote
  #36  
Shrubfest Shrubfest is offline
Thrills and Oblongs
Shrubfest's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: A cupboard.
Shrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty ok
Old May 3rd, 2008, 06:08 PM       
just what i need!
__________________
False teeth are startling.
Reply With Quote
  #37  
Sethomas Sethomas is offline
Antagonistic Tyrannosaur
Sethomas's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: The Abstruse Caboose
Sethomas is probably a spambot
Old May 3rd, 2008, 06:13 PM       
I think that in Jewish tradition, you're not supposed to read Ecclesiastes until you're in your late 30s or something.

Oops!
__________________

SETH ME IMPRIMI FECIT
Reply With Quote
  #38  
Shrubfest Shrubfest is offline
Thrills and Oblongs
Shrubfest's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: A cupboard.
Shrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty okShrubfest is probably pretty ok
Old May 3rd, 2008, 06:22 PM       
Not having read any of the bible yet, don't think i've got any worries.

Tadao, it's pretty obvious you're drunk, due to the mis-spelling. Well done! :D
__________________
False teeth are startling.
Reply With Quote
  #39  
Kybo Ren Kybo Ren is offline
ni kar'tayl gar darasuum
Kybo Ren's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Cabot Cove, Maine
Kybo Ren is probably a spambot
Old May 3rd, 2008, 06:27 PM       
Eccl. 7:26
" And I find more bitter than death the woman, whose heart is snares and nets, and her hands as bands: whoso pleaseth God shall escape from her; but the sinner shall be taken by her."

And don't forget: never question religous authority until you're dead.
__________________
Urgency without Panic, Action without Thoughtlessness.
Reply With Quote
  #40  
Tadao Tadao is offline
☆☆☆☆☆
Tadao's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2002
Tadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contestTadao won the popularity contest
Old May 3rd, 2008, 06:41 PM       
You miss understand Kybo Homo. I was raised JW and am drunk ate the same time.
Shrub : eye miss pel wen eye im sobber two
Reply With Quote
  #41  
kahljorn kahljorn is offline
BANNED
 
Join Date: May 2000
Location: NO
kahljorn won the popularity contestkahljorn won the popularity contestkahljorn won the popularity contestkahljorn won the popularity contestkahljorn won the popularity contestkahljorn won the popularity contestkahljorn won the popularity contestkahljorn won the popularity contestkahljorn won the popularity contestkahljorn won the popularity contestkahljorn won the popularity contest
Old May 4th, 2008, 01:02 AM       
Exodus 4:25 that's all I have to say.

also if you're a jew you're not supposed to cook kids in their mother's milk!

or wash milk and meat dishes together!
__________________
NEVER
Reply With Quote
  #42  
Kybo Ren Kybo Ren is offline
ni kar'tayl gar darasuum
Kybo Ren's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Cabot Cove, Maine
Kybo Ren is probably a spambot
Old May 4th, 2008, 11:44 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tadao View Post
You miss understand Kybo Homo. I was raised JW and am drunk ate the same time.


I didn't misunderstand- and I'm only gay for you.

seriously, kybo homo? you can do better, even drunk
__________________
Urgency without Panic, Action without Thoughtlessness.
Reply With Quote
  #43  
Sethomas Sethomas is offline
Antagonistic Tyrannosaur
Sethomas's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: The Abstruse Caboose
Sethomas is probably a spambot
Old May 10th, 2008, 02:59 AM       
Illustration of the Old Testament from a 13th century bible (NSFW!!)

Spoilers!
__________________

SETH ME IMPRIMI FECIT
Reply With Quote
  #44  
executioneer executioneer is offline
OH GOD
executioneer's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2001
executioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contest
Old May 10th, 2008, 03:32 AM       
man those are the unhappiest doin' it people i've ever seen
__________________
[COLOR=purple][COLOR=Magenta]SHAME ON A [COLOR=Pink]NIGGA WHO TRY TO RUN [/COLOR][URL="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NVGI6mhfJyA"]GAME[/URL] ON A NIGGA[/COLOR]
[/COLOR]
Reply With Quote
  #45  
executioneer executioneer is offline
OH GOD
executioneer's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2001
executioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contestexecutioneer won the popularity contest
Old May 16th, 2008, 10:25 PM       
no
__________________
[COLOR=purple][COLOR=Magenta]SHAME ON A [COLOR=Pink]NIGGA WHO TRY TO RUN [/COLOR][URL="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NVGI6mhfJyA"]GAME[/URL] ON A NIGGA[/COLOR]
[/COLOR]
Reply With Quote
  #46  
Mr.Hoopla Mr.Hoopla is offline
ROCK ON
Mr.Hoopla's Avatar
Join Date: May 2008
Mr.Hoopla is probably a spambot
Old May 27th, 2008, 12:16 AM       
I forget where it is but the one where David steals a bunch of philistine foreskins. I wonder if that created some sort of foreskin fairy for them?
Reply With Quote
  #47  
pac-man pac-man is offline
Oozes machismo
pac-man's Avatar
Join Date: May 2008
Location: The High Ground
pac-man is probably a spambot
Old May 27th, 2008, 01:28 PM       
God is make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.
__________________
...I proved, son, without a shadow of a doubt, you ain't got what it takes anymore! You sit there, and you thump your bible, and you say your prayers, and it didn't get you anywhere! Talk about your psalms, talk about John 3:16; Austin 3:16 says, "I just whipped your ass!"
Reply With Quote
  #48  
Grislygus Grislygus is offline
Ancient Mariner
Grislygus's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2006
Grislygus won the popularity contestGrislygus won the popularity contestGrislygus won the popularity contestGrislygus won the popularity contestGrislygus won the popularity contestGrislygus won the popularity contestGrislygus won the popularity contestGrislygus won the popularity contestGrislygus won the popularity contestGrislygus won the popularity contestGrislygus won the popularity contest
Old May 27th, 2008, 01:36 PM       
That's nice. Moving on.

All Time Favorite: The Holy Spirit has female connotations in the original texts, piss the hell out of a preacher today by bringing it up.
__________________
IT'S A GOOFY BALL, MATTHEW. NOT A SUPER COMPUTER.
Reply With Quote
  #49  
Trash Trash is offline
A Total Fairy
Trash's Avatar
Join Date: Mar 2006
Trash is probably a spambot
Old May 27th, 2008, 05:07 PM       
One day I was skipping through the bible, and there was a part in the beginning of the new testament where god was all like "I FUCKING LOVE YOU" to jesus, and the next bit was like: "and then he sent him (jesus) to the desert to be bullied by the devil."

God how I laughed.
__________________
The Lion King seemed innocent enough, didn't it? But did we really notice all the issues of assault on morality and ethics the first time we watched it? I sure did not. It was not until I sat down with a pragmatic open mind did I even realize the scope of moral violations the 83-minute The Lion King fed our minds.
Reply With Quote
  #50  
Colonel Flagg Colonel Flagg is offline
after enough bourbon ...
Colonel Flagg's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Philadelphia
Colonel Flagg has joined BAPE's armyColonel Flagg has joined BAPE's armyColonel Flagg has joined BAPE's armyColonel Flagg has joined BAPE's armyColonel Flagg has joined BAPE's armyColonel Flagg has joined BAPE's armyColonel Flagg has joined BAPE's armyColonel Flagg has joined BAPE's army
Old May 27th, 2008, 09:11 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr.Hoopla View Post
I forget where it is but the one where David steals a bunch of philistine foreskins.
1 Samuel 18:25-27
__________________
The future is fun,
The future is fair.
You may already have won!
You may already be there.
Reply With Quote
Reply
Page 2 of 3 < 1 2 3 >

« Previous Thread | Next Thread »


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

   


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:49 PM.

I-Mockery.com - Archive - Top

© 2008 I-Mockery.com
Powered by: vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.