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glowbelly glowbelly is offline
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Old Jul 11th, 2008, 02:57 PM        farting at work
who else does it?

i mean

how many of you weirdos do this?
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Tadao Tadao is offline
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Old Jul 11th, 2008, 03:08 PM       
What? I cover it with a cough.
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bigtimecow bigtimecow is offline
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Old Jul 11th, 2008, 03:27 PM       
i fart ALL the time
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Old Jul 11th, 2008, 05:31 PM       
i'm farting right now
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Mockery Mockery is offline
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Old Jul 11th, 2008, 09:05 PM       
Girls don't fart, they expel glitter and sprinkles.
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MattJack MattJack is offline
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Old Jul 11th, 2008, 09:17 PM       
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Originally Posted by Mockery View Post
Girls don't fart, they expel glitter and sprinkles.
Amen brother :hulkhogan

Growing up there were five guys in the house (three brothers, dad, and a male family dog), and my mother was the only female. She never farted, ever. In fact she use to tell us, "Girls can't do that, we don't pass gas."

I believed this communist propaganda until I was 11 years old. My world came crashing down one day when a girl farted on me during recess

Mother and I still have a rocky relationship.
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Old Jul 11th, 2008, 09:52 PM       
Beyond my whole INTERNET AURA of being whatever, the word "fart" is something I'm actually IRL averse to using. I'm not even sure why. Basically the only time I mention it is when I woo girls at parties by singing the oldest English song with the original melody preserved, since at one point it goes "Bulle sterteth, Bucke verteth, murie sing cuccoo!" and then I translate to Modern English, "the bull leaps, the stag farts, sing merrily coocoo!"

Based on the last relationship this landed me with, I'm not sure if I should keep doing that.
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Zomboid Zomboid is offline
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Old Jul 11th, 2008, 11:06 PM       
I fart all the time at work. But that doesn't mean a whole lot considering where I work.
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Old Jul 11th, 2008, 11:19 PM       
or that it's in Canada
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Old Jul 12th, 2008, 01:04 AM       
I'd rather believe that girls have no bodily functions.
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Old Jul 12th, 2008, 01:28 AM       
I used to fart at my last job. Now that I'm unemployed, I still do. Girls do fart, and I know this because unlike MattJack, my mother never bothered to hide her flatulence. My girlfriend doesn't fart when she's around me, but I'm sure she does. Everybody poops.
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Old Jul 12th, 2008, 02:06 AM       
I used to enjoy farting in elevators in government buildings. 10 AM was great.
The Metro was fun too.
Now if I can help it I keep it down to when I pass annoying people in restaurants and in lines waiting to pay for something.
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Old Jul 12th, 2008, 03:10 AM       
Man, I'm gonna be on the metro a lot
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Old Jul 12th, 2008, 08:00 AM       
my office is pretty polite. i dont know what happened though - maybe one of the CEOs started it, and it just snowballed - but man, the toilets. anything goes. as soon as that door closes, its like all colonic decorum breezes away like a guff in the wind. dont get me wrong, im glad that people feel comfortable - but how am i supposed to work with these people after hearing them take no prisoners 5 minutes ago? they should do what they do in japan and have the sound of flushing toilets looping constantly to protect everyone's dignity.
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Old Jul 12th, 2008, 04:46 PM       
i love working at a retaurant. its like the place to go if you wanna do that kind of stuff.

being a busser was the best, cause you just walk past a table and keep going and no one even sees you, cause no one likes to pay attention to bussers.

once i got promoted to to-go, i realized how good i'd had it...
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Old Jul 12th, 2008, 08:43 PM       
they can't smell farts over the fryer grease so who cares
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Old Jul 13th, 2008, 12:20 AM       
This is why I love these forums.
Also, I swear I heard a kid lose his colon at summer school the other day. The quickest way to ruin your day is walking into the bathroom, finally get good and relaxed, then hear this huge grunt noise and what sounds like pudding and a brick splash EVERYWHERE
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Old Jul 13th, 2008, 03:54 AM       
I frequently arrive at my school to find the bathroom smelling like pot and rancid shit.

Protip: This is a bad combination.
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Old Jul 13th, 2008, 09:06 AM       
I'm at work at SEVEN A.M. on SUNDAY. If I want to shit myself the boss better damn well nod his head approvingly!
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Old Jul 13th, 2008, 09:10 AM       
I wouldn't dream of farting at work.
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glowbelly glowbelly is offline
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Old Jul 13th, 2008, 09:30 AM       
who would?
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Colonel Flagg Colonel Flagg is offline
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Old Jul 13th, 2008, 12:34 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by LordSappington View Post
This is why I love these forums.
Also, I swear I heard a kid lose his colon at summer school the other day. The quickest way to ruin your day is walking into the bathroom, finally get good and relaxed, then hear this huge grunt noise and what sounds like pudding and a brick splash EVERYWHERE


I HATE it when that happens!
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LordSappington LordSappington is offline
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Old Jul 13th, 2008, 04:26 PM       
I don't want to meet the man who doesn't
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Old Jul 13th, 2008, 08:25 PM       
I fart next to ppl and then tell them i did it. unless its a boss or something. then i let some1 else take the blame by giving some1 just the right looks to indicate that they are responsible
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Zomboid Zomboid is offline
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Old Jul 13th, 2008, 08:43 PM       
rly? im surprised more ppl dont get mad @ u. i wud if some1 did that 2 me.
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