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  #1  
CaptainBubba CaptainBubba is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 04:42 PM        Hey guys, I have another problem and I NEED your help
Is it possible to be TOO good at sex???? I'm really genuinely worried. Please help guys.

Time is running out for me. I have to know, now.
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  #2  
Big McLargehuge Big McLargehuge is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 04:44 PM       
I hear if you are too good you can make the girls face explode ,
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Esuohlim Esuohlim is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 05:55 PM       
Absolutely not. Women are never fully satisfied. They lie like pigs, too. Every sound they make while you "do it" is completely fabricated to make you more horny so you can get done faster.

There's a worldwide conspiracy among the female gender, which is that the clitoris actually does something. It doesn't. So don't bother even trying to please her, she can't feel it.

The only way they orgasm is if you punch them in the nose really hard, so I'm told.
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Mr. Vagiclean Mr. Vagiclean is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 06:06 PM       
nose punch is considered a foreplay, a dropkick in the torso area is the real stinger i am told
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FartinMowler FartinMowler is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 06:11 PM       
Didn't you say last week that it was your first time?
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Pee Wee Herman Pee Wee Herman is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 06:42 PM       
If you're too good at sex, you'll get an STD.
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Terra Terra is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 07:32 PM       
Your going to have to define how good "too good" is. I haven't ever heard of anybody being too good.
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FartinMowler FartinMowler is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 07:42 PM       
Quote:
Your going to have to define how good "too good" is. I haven't ever heard of anybody being too good.
Well, If I was experienced and you weren't that would make me too good for you because you wouldn't know what to do.
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Esuohlim Esuohlim is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 07:47 PM       
Girls don't do anything. They just lie there and be naked.
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FartinMowler FartinMowler is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 07:57 PM       
Quote:
Girls don't do anything. They just lie there and be naked
1 out of 5 are duds or that's my ratio so far.
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Terra Terra is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 08:01 PM       
[quote="*FARTINMOWLER*"]
Quote:
Well, If I was experienced and you weren't that would make me too good for you because you wouldn't know what to do.
That wouldn't make you "too good" for anybody. It would make you a bit more experienced. But not "too good."
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executioneer executioneer is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 08:03 PM       
hey captain bubba what happened to being a virgin and being proud of it

or am I thinking of someone else

-willie
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executioneer executioneer is offline
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Old Feb 21st, 2004, 08:04 PM       
Quote:
I like making pamphlets about how abstinence empowers me as a teenager.


-willie
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Perndog Perndog is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 12:02 AM       
Virgins only act like they're proud of it because they can't get laid. They drop the pride like a rock the moment they know they're going to do the deed.
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Drew Katsikas Drew Katsikas is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 12:16 AM       
Terra is the only one who doesn't get a joke in this thread.

DEFINE TOO GOOD
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Pee Wee Herman Pee Wee Herman is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 12:21 AM       
By too good, I mean being so good at sex that you get STDs.

You'd, like, have to use a god mode cheat or something to protect yourself from STDs if you're that good.
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  #17  
CaptainBubba CaptainBubba is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 12:31 AM       
I am the president and founder of the abstinence club at my school. Our slogan is:

"If this doesn't get us laid. Nothing will"



And on a side note I'm severely upset that Willie seemingly no longer gets sarcasm... I love achewood too

This thread is kinda pitiful. But it reminds me why I "quit the forums"
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ScruU2wice ScruU2wice is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 01:13 AM       
Were you doing it while you typed that, cuz that would make you too good
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  #19  
executioneer executioneer is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 01:57 AM       
wtf how is this sarcasm or achewood related

-willie
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Pee Wee Herman Pee Wee Herman is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 02:28 AM       
Theoretically, it is possible to be too good at sex by fucking a girl so hard that you kill her.

Theoretically, when you fuck a girl, you could thrust your pelvis so rapidly that the friction causes a fire inside her pussy.
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Esuohlim Esuohlim is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 03:32 AM       
You try to be funny, but it seriously never works.
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Terra Terra is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 11:26 AM       
[quote="Drew Katsikas"]Terra is the only one who doesn't get a joke in this thread.

That's because I've fucked a lot of "jokes" to realize that one of them could actually write.

I guess there is hope for those ten fingers on everybody's hands. And not just covering up for the thumb that happens to be embedded up the ass's.
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Schimid Schimid is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 12:53 PM       
Wow, Terra. You sure are great at insults .
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  #24  
Supafly345 Supafly345 is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 01:02 PM       
I never knew she was so cruel.
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Terra Terra is offline
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Old Feb 22nd, 2004, 01:05 PM       
I was just *kidding.*

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