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FartinMowler FartinMowler is offline
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Old Jun 7th, 2007, 09:15 PM        Fartinmowler Private dicks last dick
I'm not dicking around. I want to write a story about you and you need to tell me what happened to you and I will solve the mystery and it will be good. So you need to write your name and your lame story and I will make it sound better
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kahljorn kahljorn is offline
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Old Jun 10th, 2007, 01:43 AM       
MY NAMES KAHLJORN AND I LOST MY PRIVATE DICK IN YOUR ANUS PLEASE MAIL IT BACK TO ME

LOL ITS FUNNY CAUSE PEOPLE ALWAYS MAKE FUN OF ME FOR LOSING MY DICK

BUT WITH SURGERY
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Girl Drink Drunk Girl Drink Drunk is offline
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Old Jun 12th, 2007, 11:33 PM       
Island Girl
What you wanting with the white man's world
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FartinMowler FartinMowler is offline
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Old Jun 13th, 2007, 04:05 PM       
I didn't know this got moved here so I will write it on Friday...
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Esuohlim Esuohlim is offline
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Old Jun 14th, 2007, 07:11 PM       
lol kahljorn
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FartinMowler FartinMowler is offline
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Old Jun 25th, 2007, 03:44 PM        Final Pile Driver Bitch Festival-A Fartin Mowler
Final Pile Driver Bitch Festival-A Fartin Mowler mystery



Shirley our CSI DNA assistant has just turned eighteen and Mr. Will Graham and I spent the evening teaching her tag team wrestling


Shirley (puts on her bra that holds her giant heaving breasts)

I just received a call about what I thought was pubic hair that we found at James home

Fartin Mowler (puts away various oils and wrestling mat)

And?

Shirley

It seems as though it wasn’t pubic hair, in fact it was from your Nemesis Seth Thomas Pace

Mr. Will Graham (Spent gets up to do some Yoga moves)

Seems as though Mr. Pace was there before us, maybe this will be enough evidence to show a judge we have ample (looks at Shirley’s breasts)...

Shirley (giggles as she does a few bunny hops to her Dummies guide to DNA book)

Ample evidence? We need funding to get to Japan if we want to crack this case

Fartin Mowler

I didn’t say anything because I wasn’t sure Shirley but I know why Seth Thomas is involved in this case and you have been a very naughty girl not to notice some crucial evidence at the scene
Shirley (starts crying and runs out of the room)

Mr. Will Graham

What the fuck did you do that for?

Fartin Mowler

Sympathy sex

Mr. Will Graham

Oh right and what is this evidence?

Fartin Mowler

(Puts on a CD of The Kings of Leon (kings of the rodeo) to cover any possible listening devices

I noticed that the holes that James had left in the walls had a distinct shape that is the Phallic Penis of Christ Key

Mr. Will Graham

A Penis that can unlock some sort of Biblical code or lock?
Shirley comes back into the room wearing nurse’s uniform

Mr. Will Graham

I think I need my temperature taken before we continue this conjecture

Fartin Mowler

I will leave you to this doctor; I think I will fly to The Biblical conjecture museum to investigate this…


I spent the better day flying down to Macon Georgia to meet a Pastor named Ignatius Flamingo

Fartin Mowler (stands in front of a boys school full of young men playing British Bulldog being coached by a

short balding man in priests clothes)

Hello are you Father Ignatius Flamingo?

Priest

Jess I am

(Scene)

Father Ignatius has spotted my partner Mr. Will graham and as he pulls out a sawed off shotgun Mr. Will shoots from the grassy nole killing the Priest and saving me once again.

Fartin Mowler

What the fuck?

Mr. Will Graham

Did you want him to shoot you?

(Scene)

A commotion is happening with all the boys in the school yard and James is spotted pulling up his pants in the middle of a crowd of young boys and then runs towards a field

Fartin Mowler (about to run after him)

Holy fuck?

Mr. Will Graham

That's not James

Fartin Mowler

Don't tell me it's his twin brother

Mr. Will Graham

worse it's a clone and they all have a key shaped penis

Fartin Mowler

We need to find this Holy Grail and stop him....



(Scene)


Seth Thomas Pace is in a Marrakech bar talking to an informant




Seth

Don't fuck with me, I know James is in Japan and I need to know what he is holding

Informant


Only god knows if he can keep it up and open the door to Christ



Seth (tokes on a really big Bong)

What?

Informant

You think too much Mr. Pace, look into your heart and feel the flow of blood and mankind and you will kill the Serpent or be killed by a righteous man

Too be continued ....

Last edited by FartinMowler : Jul 22nd, 2007 at 03:10 AM.
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GADZOOKS GADZOOKS is offline
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Old Jun 26th, 2007, 05:43 PM       
which character do you play?
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FartinMowler FartinMowler is offline
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Old Jun 26th, 2007, 09:53 PM       
The lead character
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GADZOOKS GADZOOKS is offline
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Old Jun 27th, 2007, 01:17 AM       


GOOD ANSWER!! GOOD ANSWER!!
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FartinMowler FartinMowler is offline
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Old Jun 27th, 2007, 07:37 AM       
Richard Dawson
AKA Colin Emm

Born: 20-Nov-1932
Birthplace: Gosport, England

Gender: Male
Race or Ethnicity: White
Sexual orientation: Straight
Occupation: Game Show Host

Nationality: United States
Executive summary: Hogan's Heroes, Family Feud

At 14, Richard Dawson ran away from home, lied about his age and joined the Merchant Marine. For a few years he made extra cash as an unsanctioned professional boxer. After three years in the Merchant Marine, Dawson studied drama, and eventually became a moderately successful cabaret and TV comedian in Britain. He came to America in the early 1960s, and had guest roles on The Jack Benny Program and The Dick Van Dyke Show. Fame came with the role of Cpl. Newkirk on Hogan's Heroes, America's favorite lovable-Nazi sit-com, from 1965-1971. When that show was cancelled, Dawson became a regular for the last two seasons of Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In.

In the mid-1970s, Dawson was a regular on The Match Game, a ribald celebrity quiz show, where he caught the producers' attention as a guy who could ad lib funny. They set up Dawson as host of Family Feud, which became a huge hit. Dawson was famous for kissing the female contestants, and met his second wife, Gretchen Johnson, when she and her family were contestants on Family Feud. Yet there were whispers that Dawson had become thoroughly unlikable when the cameras weren't rolling. He was fired from Match Game in 1978 for perpetual grumpiness -- a detriment when the show is supposed to be funny. But Dawson's Family Feud remained hugely popular, with Dawson kissing grandmothers and asking inane questions on thousands of episodes until 1985.
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GADZOOKS GADZOOKS is offline
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Old Jun 30th, 2007, 12:09 AM       
good for him, but that doesn't ANSWER MY QUESTION
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FartinMowler FartinMowler is offline
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Old Jul 2nd, 2007, 01:25 PM       
I play a Dick
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GADZOOKS GADZOOKS is offline
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Old Jul 10th, 2007, 01:51 AM       
not much of a stretch there
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Miss Modular Miss Modular is offline
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Old Jul 18th, 2007, 02:26 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by FartinMowler View Post
I play a Dick
and you're annyoing.
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FartinMowler FartinMowler is offline
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Old Jul 19th, 2007, 08:52 AM       
I would like to see Miss Modular any kind of writing. I've been on many "Script writing" forums full of people that are fucking bores that believe they are brilliant writers . My favorite thing they write is "I can't post it because it's so good I don't want anyone to steal my idea". I find that annoying
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