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  #1001  
All Hail Duke All Hail Duke is offline
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Old May 6th, 2012, 08:52 PM       
i dreamt that dave hester (storage wars) was talking about cheating on his wife, denying and finally admitting it, then talking about potentially losing his auction house

i watch that show too goddamned much
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  #1002  
Dimnos Dimnos is offline
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Old May 7th, 2012, 09:54 AM       
As I read that, I imagined his wife walking out on him while he yells out monetary bids to convince her to stay.
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  #1003  
Big McLargehuge Big McLargehuge is offline
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Old May 7th, 2012, 12:04 PM       
As I read that, I imagined all the time boring fucks like yourselves spend slowly rotting in front of awful television.
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  #1004  
Zhukov Zhukov is offline
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Old May 7th, 2012, 10:56 PM       
So I was a rugby playing burglar, and I had to steal museum pieces whilst playing rugby. The goods were scattered around the outside of the playing field - and between them and the field there was a never-ending pit... during half time or whatever my team mates and I hung over the side of the pit while we made plans to steal things. I don't know why.

I went sneaking around to steal stuff, and someone on my rugby team whom I considered an ally (actually a throw away acquaintance from primary school) dobbed me in to the authorities after he was caught himself.

I was given a lecture about how stealing affects the community, and I retorted with how everyone should enjoy the museum items, not just the rich.
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  #1005  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old May 8th, 2012, 06:52 AM       
I dreamed that Tadao posted some big long thing in the General Blabber forum about how he was tired of all of our crap and basically wrote a long list where he attacked every single one of us for something or other.
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  #1006  
Tadao Tadao is offline
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Old May 8th, 2012, 02:30 PM       
I do that every night in my head.
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  #1007  
kahljorn kahljorn is offline
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Old May 8th, 2012, 03:38 PM       
i remember that thread
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  #1008  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Jun 7th, 2012, 06:26 PM       
I was neatly folding spinach leaves in parchment paper, ironing the folds and sending stacks of them to a bank via drive-up tube.
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  #1009  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Jun 13th, 2012, 11:44 AM       
Trapped in the attic of a bookstore, calling down for a ladder, and the owner said he would trade a ladder for a hug.
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  #1010  
Esuohlim Esuohlim is offline
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Old Jun 13th, 2012, 03:58 PM       
Dreamt I got the job I've been wanting for two weeks

Not weird, but fuck that shit
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  #1011  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Jun 13th, 2012, 11:02 PM       
Weirdly enough, I had the exact same dream when I took a nap this afternoon. I also had a strange feeling that the guy looked familiar, but I couldn't place him. After probably too many hours of thinking about it, I realized he was a cast member in the last Rocky Horror I went to, the one that called for me not to leave because I was the only audience member they had.

In the dream, for some reason, I am in either a second-level room of a shopping center or an attic of the guy's bookstore. There is a hole or open hatchway in the floor and no way to get down. When I call down asking if he has a ladder, he asks what I'll give for it. Somehow a hug is negotiated.

I could write a romance novel that starts that way and make maybe hundreds of dollars.
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  #1012  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Jun 16th, 2012, 09:00 PM       
I had this dream where you know that iphone app for running that brings up your position on gps and tells you there are zombies and you have to outrun the zombies. it was like that except instead of zombies it was packs of champions and elites from diablo 3. Fuck desecrater jailers ruining my fucking workout in dreamland.
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  #1013  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Jun 16th, 2012, 09:14 PM       
I dreamed that I found a little dachshund puppy in my grandmother's backyard. I was sad when I woke up and he wasn't real
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  #1014  
EisigerBiskuit EisigerBiskuit is offline
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Old Jun 17th, 2012, 10:18 PM       
I was crawling on the ground and collecting teeth, putting them back in my mouth.
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  #1015  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Jul 9th, 2012, 09:53 AM       
Dreamed that I went to take my kid for kindergarten readiness exams and, lo and behold, my old boss was in charge of them and wouldn't let us do them.

Guy's even a bastard in my dreams.
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  #1016  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Sep 9th, 2012, 03:41 PM       
Dreamed I went back to high school, but it was a completely different school by a river. They told me that I was to just stick to my (in-dream) old schedule, but I'd been gone so long I didn't know what the hell that was so I was basically just wandering hoping I would find the right classroom, wanting to just blow off the classes because I was so far behind, not having been in high school for 17 years now, that I couldn't possibly pass them.

Some of the dream was standing on the riverbank looking for Mothman, and only seeing Canada geese.

Some of the dream was Fathom Zero sending me a letter on beautiful vellum that was patterned with grass leaves, telling me he did not believe I spoke French because he had never seen me speak it, so then I wrote him a long letter in French explaning exactly why and how he should go fuck himself. But I kept the letter because the vellum was so pretty.

Part of the dream was my one of my old bitch bosses coming out of a bathroom stall and me waiting there and slamming a stall door in her face and going YEAHHHHHHHH and running the hell out of there before she regained consciousness.

Woke up with a headache
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  #1017  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Oct 28th, 2012, 01:43 PM       
I must have incorporated the idea of Zhukov wanting to run a Black Books into my subconscious, because I had a dream in which he walked up to 3 skinheads and said, "Which one of you. Bitches. Wants to dance?"

Now, of course, I have to watch the entire thing over again.
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  #1018  
AChimp AChimp is offline
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Old Oct 31st, 2012, 11:35 PM       
I dreamed that I was watching this little girl fight a tiger in a circus ring. She won by biting it in the throat.

Then I was cleaning my toilet.
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  #1019  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Nov 1st, 2012, 06:52 AM       
Some sort of dream-movie in which David Huddleston was playing a resort owner trying to sleep with an employee, played by Jennifer Lawrence. After much sparring and outsmarting she laughed and said, "Sorry, but they say God Himself is standing in line" and he chuckled and gave up.

It was a good movie other than some weird parts about grinding cinnamon sticks and ordering books at a special price.
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  #1020  
LordSappington LordSappington is offline
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Old Nov 1st, 2012, 12:35 PM       
I had one last night where I had a pet rat, but it was the size of a large chihuahua, and acted more like a dog. Then I had another where I found a baby deer, and for some reason it already had some kick-ass antlers. I took it home and it was my buddy.
I think this is my brain telling me to get a pet.
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  #1021  
kahljorn kahljorn is offline
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Old Nov 1st, 2012, 02:49 PM       
get a pet oppossum
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  #1022  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Nov 4th, 2012, 06:52 AM       
Dreamed that, not only had mr kitsa never gotten rid of an apartment he kept in a super 8 motel, but had forgotten he still owed rent and was several years in arrears. The whole place had become overrun by roaches and there were even rats in the microwave. Much of the dream was me trying to see if anything was salvageable before the place was bulldozed.
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  #1023  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Nov 7th, 2012, 06:11 AM       
Something about Uganda selling some sort of shitty substandard chocolate to flood the Greek market (?). I have a vague recollection of someone opening a bag and peeling it away from a large, melted cluster of chocolate balls that looked like grapes.
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  #1024  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Nov 24th, 2012, 08:31 AM       
Bunch of mini-dreams about alterations my grandmother made to her house. Her house is a lot like the Winchester mansion irl, so all of it seems perfectly likely.

The first dream, she became obsessed by the idea that someone might sit on her white living-room furniture, so she walled off the whole room and painted the wall bright blue.

In the second dream, she replaced half of her bedroom floor with a trampoline. Because the carpet was covered in about 6 inches of dust and because the trampoline fabric was the same color as the carpet, I didn't realize it at first until I was sinking down into it. It got more transparent the further down you went so I could see the basement below and I was pinwheeling my arms thinking wtf.

The third was of me being awakened by the son of the woman who goes to her house to cut her hair, and wondering why the hell she was having her hair cut at 3 in the morning.

No idea why I would have all of these dreams, but like I said the odds of one of these events happening irl are not negligible.
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  #1025  
dextire dextire is offline
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Old Nov 25th, 2012, 12:39 AM       
I finally had a weird dream! I got tazed at jury duty for shooting someone with a nerf gun. I grabbed an old guy with pacemaker while being shocked and it killed him. So I had to stand trial for involuntary manslaughter that same day to a judge in a purple ape suit.
Turns out fever plus cold medicine makes for weird dreams.
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