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  #51  
LordSappington LordSappington is offline
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Old Jul 8th, 2011, 10:48 PM       
Oh yeah; I have some weird horizontal scars on my back; they're about six inches to a foot long, and deep enough that I can feel scar tissue beneath the skin. We have no idea how I got these at all.
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Colonel Flagg Colonel Flagg is offline
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Old Jul 9th, 2011, 09:36 AM       
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My kindergarden teacher said "your right hand is the hand you use", and I'm left-handed, so I was fucked up from the beginning.
My daughter's a lefty and it really pisses me off that they don't carry any gear for lefties. Hey, businesses, you're not targeting 10% of the population.

I once found a left-handed softball mitt that fit her hand. In K-mart.

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Oh yeah; I have some weird horizontal scars on my back; they're about six inches to a foot long, and deep enough that I can feel scar tissue beneath the skin. We have no idea how I got these at all.
That was Freddy Krueger.
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Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Jul 9th, 2011, 09:56 AM       
That's for sure. Except I couldn't use left-handed scissors for the longest time. The paper just bent. I got a good pair last year and it's the first time I've ever really been able to cut anything with lefties. I also skee-ball right handed. I'm very good at skee-ball.

I've currently got about a 2" scar at the corner of my forehead that is a "revision" of another scar. I had a halo brace (4 bolts in the skull) when I was 12, and one of my scars was looking more like a giant divot the older I got. They got in there with the original intention to just neaten it up, and found that I had this patch of scar tissue fusing my skin to my skull. So, as I mentioned here a couple of months ago, I got to sit there wide awake and only half-local-anesthetized (stuff doesn't take very well on me) as they laboriously peeled a scar off my skull and sutured me back up.

Thing is, the "revised" scar, so far, isn't much of an improvement. It's just a long dent instead of a round divot.

There goes my career as a supermodel.
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LordSappington LordSappington is offline
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Old Jul 11th, 2011, 03:17 AM       
Not really an injury (yet), but October of 2010, I pulled a cap off my molar with a caramel apple pop. The dentist said there'd need to be a root canal (sic?) done, but it could wait. Well, my tooth has been aching for a few weeks now, I could feel a pain under my gums above the tooth if I pressed it a bit, and now there's a big swollen lump under my gums above it. I keep imagining it's full of blood and rancid pus and it's going to pop open when I'm eating or something
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Old Jul 11th, 2011, 03:19 AM       
5 years ago I forgot to turn the wheels under the bed inward and stubbed my toe.
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Old Jul 11th, 2011, 09:47 AM       
When I was 5 I fell out of a top bunk and landed on my head.

When I was 6 I jumped off a rocking chair and hit my chin and upper lip on the hearth. I don't remember anything directly after that except watching "Puff The Magic Dragon" and "It's Magic Charlie Brown", but the lip scar suggests that it was torn in half vertically. I definitely had to get stitches. No hair will grow where my chin was cut...So beards look pretty stupid on me.

Three circular scars on back of head from chemical burns resulting from trying to bleach and dye hair the same day.

One scar on right wrist from being knocked out of a window by a big rubber ball while my hand was stuck in the cord to the blinds. I had it looped around and was holding onto it for balance. Although my feet were touching the ground once I was out of the window, I was still hanging from the wrist by that cord.

Scar on right hand from a fireworks "punk" lighter when I was 9.

Scar on right shin from gouging it with an ankle-level pole stuck in the ground near a PGE vault.

Amazing how fragile we are, with entire shows being made about stupid ways people have died- and yet this is all that most of us ever do to themselves.
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LordSappington LordSappington is offline
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Old Jul 12th, 2011, 04:59 AM       
Beards already look stupid on you.
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Old Jul 12th, 2011, 01:26 PM       
..

Last edited by creeposaurus : Jun 8th, 2012 at 07:27 PM.
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  #59  
Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Jul 31st, 2011, 01:56 PM       
I totally racked myself on the end of a railing today at a restaurant. Had I been a guy, I would still be rolling in the parking lot.

I was holding the baby, so everything on that side of my peripheral vision was blocked. A guy was holding the door for a long line of people, so I was trying to hurry it up. Just as I was thanking him and picking up speed, I slammed right into the end of the railing. The completely stationary, sharp-cornered metal end of the railing.

I sort of doubled over, but it's embarrassing, you know? Especially since a neighbor of mine worked there and was standing a few feet away. My immediate physical reaction was to puke and/or tear up, but I just sort of laughed it off and stumbled a few feet to a table and waited till the worst of the fresh-injury sensations passed.

An hour and a half later, it still hurts. It feels like it's going to be one of those deep, sickening bruises. I definitely felt the corner connect with bone, so that's always fun.
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Old Aug 1st, 2011, 05:19 AM       
Well in a few months you'll be the proud mother of a baby railing
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Old Aug 1st, 2011, 11:16 AM       
I bashed off the toenail on my small toe by running over a counter once.




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I have a star shaped scar on my hand from a self inflicted wound I did years ago.
I have a shitload of scars on my arms, palm, and hands from protecting myself from being stabbed and attempting to stab back (knife fight woo!).
I have dog bite scars on my right arm.
I have scars on my back from getting hit with hangers, belts, etc as a kid.
Did you live in a trailer park or the ghetto. That's just not right.
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Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Aug 1st, 2011, 11:26 AM       
Forming a big black bruise at the site of the rail hit. Could still be in Hustler, though.
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Old Aug 1st, 2011, 11:35 AM       
In the end, isn't that all anyone truly wants out of life?
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Old Aug 1st, 2011, 04:44 PM       
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Did you live in a trailer park or the ghetto. That's just not right.
The area I lived in was a combination of both.
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Old Aug 1st, 2011, 10:52 PM       
Ghetto trailer park? I don't even want to think about such a thing existing.
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Colonel Flagg Colonel Flagg is offline
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Old Aug 2nd, 2011, 09:29 AM       
I always thought "ghetto" and "trailer park" were synonymous.
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Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Aug 2nd, 2011, 09:38 AM       
There are several in Springfield.
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Old Aug 3rd, 2011, 01:28 AM       
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I always thought "ghetto" and "trailer park" were synonymous.
welcome to maryland.
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Rongi Rongi is offline
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Old Aug 11th, 2011, 08:07 PM       
I have a scar on my cheek from when I got mugged three years ago. This dude pulled a boxcutter out and slashed my face after I gave him my wallet.
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Old Aug 11th, 2011, 08:09 PM       
I was incredibly stoned when this happened so I wasn't actually sure it was real
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Old Aug 11th, 2011, 10:14 PM       
I guess my recent exploit belongs in this thread. I was backing off my in-laws' front porch, preparing to leave, and I stepped on the edge of a piece of concrete. Lost my balance, put my other foot down to catch myself, ankle turned, heard a snap, down I went.

I brushed it off as a sprain but I heard from the doctor today that it's an avulsion fracture (the tendon, instead of tearing or ripping, just pulls free of its moorings, taking the bone it was attached to with it).

I wouldn't say I'm in a horrendous amount of pain and the swelling isn't that bad. More than anything, my ankle just has a floppy, unsteady feel to it, like I'm about to turn on it and sprain it at any moment.
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Old Aug 12th, 2011, 10:51 PM       
tried walking some distance on the ankle today and now it hurts like a vicious mofo. It's actually throbbing and twitching with the pulse, which would be cool if it didn't hurt so damn much.
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Pentegarn Pentegarn is offline
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Old Aug 13th, 2011, 06:05 AM       
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My kindergarden teacher said "your right hand is the hand you use", and I'm left-handed, so I was fucked up from the beginning.
If that takes though laftys can become ambidextrous, which I can assure you from experience is a useful skill. It doesn't often work though
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Kitsa Kitsa is offline
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Old Aug 13th, 2011, 07:41 AM       
Didn't work on me.
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