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lumpisan lumpisan is offline
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Old Jan 23rd, 2010, 02:04 AM        Interracial relationship racist mom
Ok so heres whats been going on. My Gf is black and i am white. not a big deal. we've been dating for baout 7 months now and are really close(ie weve started saying we love each other). The problem, is my mom is to put it lightly batshit insane about me dating a girl of a different race. She actually brought up the "purity of our familys blood" and how" i am disgracing my ancestors" which i know is bs but whatever.
the problem isw my gf wants to meet her and im not sure how to tell her because shes alil sensitive to people being racist.
so im kinda in a rut right now idk what to tell her
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Old Jan 23rd, 2010, 02:25 AM       
Just tell her that you have a batshit insane racist for a mother. Why lie? Why feel like your mum's views will affect the way your girlfriend feels about you? I think you are assuming that not only has she not had to face race issues all through her life, but that she wont be able to handle the fact that you are in (through no choice of your own) a relationship with someone that has conflicting views to the two of you.

It can't be as serious or as close as you think it is if she will think less of you for the views of your mother. Don't worry, she can probably handle it. I'm reasonably sure.

On the other hand, when she finds out (of course she will!) that you lied about your mother, she will be pissed at you for not trusting her, or not thinking she was able to handle it.
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Old Jan 23rd, 2010, 02:31 AM       
welll i habvent told her about my mom yet i keep changing the subject but ya i think honestly im going to tell her tommorow is alil late tonight but.... i think shell understand i just dont wanta see her upset but youre right i cant really lie about this
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Old Jan 23rd, 2010, 02:58 AM       
Don't build it up to be something dark and important that you have to keep hidden from her. It's not YOUR problem, it's your mum's. I'd mention it, be sheepish and embarrassed and what not, but don't get caught up in saying you are sorry over and over again or asking for forgiveness.

She might still want to meet her. If she does, then, well, you warned her, right?
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Old Jan 23rd, 2010, 03:00 AM       
Ditto, ditto, ditto.

It's not you, it's her.
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Old Jan 23rd, 2010, 09:05 AM       
Also, you need to confront your mother. There are a couple facts she needs to understand

1) You are your own man. Your life is yours, and you have a right to pursue whatever you want to make you happy as long as it is within the limits of the law, and interracial dating is, last I checked, legal.

2) Her racism is just that; Her hangup, not yours. She is free to hate for no reason all she wants. But she is not free to project her hangups onto you.

3) "Purity of bloodline" is really a stupid line to take. As there is no such thing as a pure bloodline and chances are almost a dead certainty that if she looks back in her family tree far enough, there will be some non white person in the story somewhere.

4) What she is doing is flat out hurtful, and she needs to be made to see that. Maybe ask her how she would feel if you started telling her who she could and could not date.
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Old Jan 23rd, 2010, 11:51 AM       
Just tell her your mom is old time dumb. I'm pretty sure its 2010 but people will still cling to old misunderstood ways. I told my dad last week my girlfriend was black just to see his facial reaction. He was like "I thought she was Irish." I was like she's both... she does the shamrock shake."

No offense whatsoever to Generation X(I'm only out by a few years) but Generation Y seems to be a lot more tolerable of different race relations. I don't base who I date on skin color or where they grew up. Even if their skin color is the same as mine, grew up in a nice neighborhood and have a nice family they can end up being a wackjob. See DMZ.
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Old Jan 23rd, 2010, 01:54 PM       
Quit trying to protect your mom you little pussy.
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Old Jan 23rd, 2010, 02:49 PM       
I love how trendy white guys with black girls have gotten in the past 5 years, when I was a kid black girls HATED white guys. Now its like being a celebrity.
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Old Jan 23rd, 2010, 09:57 PM       
Lumpy, you need to show your mom another individual who was all about purity of blood.



Unless your mom is Marge Schott, this should have a pretty profound effect.
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 02:48 AM       
This is where the party ends
I can't stand here listening to Shipwreck
And his racist mom
I know politics bore him
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to Shipwreck
And his racist mom

It was the loveliest party that I've ever attended
If anything was broken I'm sure it could be mended
My head can't tolerate this bobbing and pretending
Listen to some bullet-head and the madness that she's saying

This is where the party ends
I'll just sit here wondering how Shipwreck
Can stand by his racist mom
I know politics bore him
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to Shipwreck
Shipwreck and his racist mom
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 02:54 AM       
You're so flood, Sam.
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 08:05 AM       
Sam is a giant among men.
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 08:06 AM       
are you sure
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 01:35 PM       
I might be.
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 02:14 PM       
thank you, you've been a wonderful audience
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 02:34 PM       
Hey guys, how can I make you think that I'm not racist or gay? OH WAIT! I KNOW WHAT TO DO!
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 03:35 PM       
You should probably avoid keeping it til the last minute, too. If you're walking up to your mom's house and then lean over to say, "oh by the way, my mom's a huge racist," that may reflect badly on you.
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 09:48 PM       
Lumpy, you better have told her by now.
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 09:58 PM       
I did this morning actually. She asked again why i didnt want her to meet my mom and i told her basically that like 10000 volt ghost said that shes old time stupid and a racist cunt. She actually laughed at what my mom had said and said on mothers day i should get her a copy of mein kempf so it went well^^ thanks guys honestly i think if i hadnt had your advice i probably wouldve kept avoiding this until it blew up in my face
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 10:01 PM       
and god help me i love sam
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 10:18 PM       
Way to not deal with your moms racism, this will end well.
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 10:22 PM       
meh i cant really deal with my mom and honestly if this means she'll be outta my life then great lol^^
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 10:27 PM       
Fuck you, fix your fucking inbreed mom so that we don't have to deal with her fucking shit anymore.
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Old Jan 24th, 2010, 10:40 PM       
If you don't fix things with your mom, it will come back to haunt you. I speak from experience.
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