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  #176  
Tadao Tadao is offline
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Old Nov 11th, 2008, 01:17 PM       
You should stop sying the word baby then!
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  #177  
MetalMilitia MetalMilitia is offline
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Old Nov 11th, 2008, 01:47 PM       
If you understand women, you don't understand women.
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japan
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  #178  
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Old Nov 11th, 2008, 08:02 PM       
Knowing is none of the battle.
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  #179  
Dixie Dixie is offline
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Old Nov 12th, 2008, 05:47 AM       
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  #180  
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Old Nov 12th, 2008, 09:20 AM       
During sex she tells me that she likes it when I do exactly what I want and when I take an assertive tone, but through trial and error I have worked out that this means that what I want should be exactly what she wants, and I have to pretend that I am being assertive when I'm really not.
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  #181  
Dixie Dixie is offline
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Old Nov 12th, 2008, 09:26 AM       
You're learning.
The next step is to know what she wants before she has to ask you.
When you start hearing "How many times do I have to tell you", work on your telepathy hardcore.
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  #182  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Nov 15th, 2008, 04:50 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zhukov View Post
During sex she tells me that she likes it when I do exactly what I want and when I take an assertive tone, but through trial and error I have worked out that this means that what I want should be exactly what she wants, and I have to pretend that I am being assertive when I'm really not.

That's why you need the "Cone of Silence". Turns out you can still hear each other with the lights out.


I've found out that whatever you think a girl doesn't want is what she needs.
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  #183  
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Old Nov 23rd, 2008, 03:15 AM       
You've found out all women need to be murdered? :o
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The Lion King seemed innocent enough, didn't it? But did we really notice all the issues of assault on morality and ethics the first time we watched it? I sure did not. It was not until I sat down with a pragmatic open mind did I even realize the scope of moral violations the 83-minute The Lion King fed our minds.
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  #184  
LordSappington LordSappington is offline
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Old Nov 23rd, 2008, 10:15 PM       
What's it mean when a girl is obviously hitting on you, then right when you start to ask her out she talks about how excited she is the boy she likes asked for her number?
(
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  #185  
DevilWearsPrada DevilWearsPrada is offline
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Old Nov 24th, 2008, 12:20 AM       
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  #186  
DevilWearsPrada DevilWearsPrada is offline
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Old Nov 24th, 2008, 12:20 AM       
Impress the Females
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  #187  
Dixie Dixie is offline
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Old Nov 24th, 2008, 11:41 AM       
If you HAVE to keep posting on I-mockery, please stay out of Loveline.
You're unfunnier than me, and that's so not cool.
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  #188  
10,000 Volt Ghost 10,000 Volt Ghost is offline
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Old Nov 24th, 2008, 09:53 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by LordSappington View Post
What's it mean when a girl is obviously hitting on you, then right when you start to ask her out she talks about how excited she is the boy she likes asked for her number?
(

That's when you say: "And why don't 'I' have your number?" If you already have her number just offhandedly mention "Oh, that guy? He's a wiener."

Make it very suggestible
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Last edited by 10,000 Volt Ghost : Nov 24th, 2008 at 09:54 PM. Reason: I -> O
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  #189  
Tadao Tadao is offline
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Old Nov 24th, 2008, 11:05 PM       
Well played sir!
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  #190  
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Old Nov 24th, 2008, 11:27 PM       
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Originally Posted by Tadao View Post
You should stop sying the word baby then!
BABY
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  #191  
Zomboid Zomboid is offline
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Old Nov 25th, 2008, 02:06 AM       
Luc says:
There's this one ginger girl at school that keeps saying we should PARTY TOGETHER and shit like that
Luc says:
and I'm always kinda laughing and turning away
Luc says:
and then I call her a ginger in the hopes that it'll piss her off, but it never does
Heather says:
just start being creepy. call her a ginger and then say "mmm i love gingerbread cookies!"
Heather says:
then tell her what you told me when we were sitting alone in your basement one day.... "i like my women like my coffee... ground up and in the freezer!"
Luc says:
hahahahahaha
Luc says:
I forgot about that
Luc says:
that was a fun day
Heather says:
what day
Luc says:
when I said that
Luc says:
I think that was the same day we watched the shining
Heather says:
lol ya. i dont rememeber finishing that
Luc says:
me neither actually
Heather says:
haha i wonder what could have happened then
Luc says:
I AM NOT SURE
Heather says:
i wonder what *should* have happened then!!>!>!>!
Luc says:
hahahaha yeah really
Luc says:
god damn
Heather says:
that could have been great. if i wasnt such a prude and virgin then im sure we would have done nothing but fuck
Heather says:
too bad
Luc says:
haha yeeeeeah. I remember being extremely horny that entire time
Heather says:
well you should have just been like " baby... just let me put it in... for a quick second"
Heather says:
or "baby just let me put it in your butt.. youll still be a virgin. come on... ill be gentle"
Heather says:
hahah
Luc says:
hahahahaha
Luc says:
you would've let me?
Heather says:
lol i dunno.. you never tried


---------


EDIT: But hey---- Casual sex! Yay for high school relationships turning into fucking in college.
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That was very funny. Well done.
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  #192  
Tadao Tadao is offline
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Old Nov 25th, 2008, 02:44 AM       
It's better if I imagine Luc to be a girl.
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  #193  
Chojin Chojin is offline
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Old Nov 25th, 2008, 06:06 PM       
Or heather to be zomboid.
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  #194  
Zomboid Zomboid is offline
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Old Nov 25th, 2008, 07:48 PM       
TO BE FAIR, I NEVER SPECIFIED WHICH I AM, OR THAT I'M INVOLVED IN THAT AT ALL. THEY CAN BE WHOEVER YOU WANT.
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That was very funny. Well done.
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  #195  
MetalMilitia MetalMilitia is offline
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Old Nov 25th, 2008, 09:09 PM       
Indeed this is prime material for the erotic Zomboid fanfictions I've been working on.
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japan
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  #196  
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Old Nov 25th, 2008, 10:31 PM       
Today was a monumental day. I actually pissed off a woman for considering her feelings!

This girl and I had been texting each other back and forth rapid-fire style all morning. Check this out and tell me that it isn't crazy woman speak.

(I was giving her a hard time about eating sushi with me tomorrow evening, just playing with her)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Girl TXT @ 9:59am
Dont act like that i just dont know when they close or when ill get otta hurr. If i get there in time ill tots get sushi wit u
Quote:
Originally Posted by MattJack TXT @ 10:02am
d: aight. I have to cook tomorrow night too. So sushi may not work, but I'll cross my fingers all today.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Girl TXT @ 10:04am
Youre acting like you miss me or something...
Quote:
Originally Posted by MattJack TXT @ 10:06am
I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss having you around. Nobody likes a liar. It isn't like I all of a sudden stopped thinkin you were cute and fun to be around.
Then nothing. The txting completely stopped. Maybe she went to do something, had class, or had to work? Oh well. An hour passed and I just thought that maybe she had been tied up by something.

A few hours pass and I just kind of think maybe I had over-stepped my bounds by complimenting her or maybe she didn't like it.

So I send this to make sure I didn't make her feel uncomfortable:
Quote:
Originally Posted by MattJack TXT @ 1:10pm
I hope that last text didn't bend you out of shape. I was just paying you a compliment.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Girl TXT @ 2:29pm
You need to get over yourself Mr. Matt...
hahaha what?

Quote:
Originally Posted by MattJack
Mmkay. I'll work on that. In the mean time don't insult me again.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Girl
I just dont get why you think im so sensative.... You always talk to me like im being a woman when i haven't even said anything. It just seems kinda rude to me.
Sorry? I was just making sure that I didn't make you feel uncomfortable Always talking to you like you're being a woman? Huh?

So I did what every guy has to do at that moment which is to break it down for 'em.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MattJack
Well in my experience I am use to women being a little sensitive. So I was just making sure you didnt get upset. Sorry. Then you insult me by telling me to get over myself? Good job. I apologize for trying to make sure that you didnt take me wrong. How silly of me.
Looks like I'm eating sushi by myself tomorrow

MAKE SENSE OF THAT
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  #197  
Zomboid Zomboid is offline
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Old Nov 25th, 2008, 11:18 PM       
SLOW YOUR ROLL, PLAYA! SHE DON' WAN' NONE O' DAT!
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That was very funny. Well done.
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  #198  
MattJack MattJack is offline
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Old Nov 25th, 2008, 11:19 PM       
i've already had demz
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  #199  
Sam Sam is offline
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Old Nov 25th, 2008, 11:30 PM       
I'll go to sushi with you MattJack.
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  #200  
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Old Nov 25th, 2008, 11:56 PM       
As will I. Just us three girls. We can gaaaaab and stuff our faces with all sorts of raw fish and... I don't know what
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That was very funny. Well done.
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