Your weirdest dreams?

[Esuohlim]

What does mean when you dream about murdering a whole basement full of people you've never met?

I even picked up a rocking chair and crushed someone's neck with it

[Kitsa]

No idea. However, I dreamed about Oprah last night. She was the evil ruler of wherever it was I was staying, and I peeped in a room at one point and it was like her secret sleeping-on-the-floor lair, like those movies where they come upon Dracula asleep in his coffin.

[Zhukov]

Originally Posted by Esuohlim

What does mean when you dream about murdering a whole basement full of people you've never met?

I even picked up a rocking chair and crushed someone's neck with it

It just means you are perfectly fine.

[LordSappington]

I took 4mg of diazepam for my vertigo attack last night, and had the best sleep I've had in months. My dream was pretty geeky. The best part was when I somehow got these little creeper figurines. Now I want those creepers.

[Shrubfest]

All my dreams are coming true as of late. And they're all awful.

[Zhukov]

I had a dream come true a few pages back in this thread, I think. It was only about running out of toilet paper though.

[Kitsa]

I watched Bridezillas last night and this woman was on:



...so naturally she made an unwelcome appearance in my dream later.

I dreamed I went to her house to buy a big dining room table from her. She was being generally bitchy and dismissive for someone who was trying to sell a table. I would ask her a question and she wouldn't even look up at me, she'd just say "I don't know" and continue to text. The table was disassembled, and I asked her where the legs were.

"I don't know." (text text text)

So I looked around and found four possible candidates for the table legs. Two were round and varnished, two were square and painted mustard-yellow. I said, "are these the legs?"

"I don't know." (text text text)

At that point in the dream I was getting pretty pissed off at her and I saw this steep stairway to her attic behind the table. I decided to climb the stairway and hunt for the legs up there. On my way up, I happened to glance up and see a small round window at the top of the staircase. Splayed out in the window (which was about the diameter of a basketball) was a spider large enough to completely cover it.

I went whoooaaaaa and slid backwards down the staircase, told her those table legs were just fine, and scuttled out of there.

End of dream.

[sspadowsky]

I dreamed that I went to Los Angeles for some reason; why, I do not know, as I would never go there unless it was unavoidable. I parked my old car that I haven't owned for a few years at Jay Leno's restaurant (don't remember what it was called, but in the dream, Jay Leno owned the goddamn place), where I was going to meet an ex-girlfriend from several years ago. I came back to find my car gone. I didn't know if it was stolen or towed, and for the rest of the dream Jay Leno was trying to help me figure out what happened to it. I vaguely remember nearly shooting a fat greasy-looking guy because he looked like a tow truck driver.

My dreams are stupid.

[Zhukov]

Everyone's dreams are stupid.


I dreamed I was back on the farm I lived on when I was a wee lad, and I was on guard duty. The neighbours had released their horse sized rooster into our paddock, and it was attacking our horse, and when I went in to put a stop to it (how do you stop a horse sized rooster? Fuck knows) things turned ugly.

There was a guy driving around the paddock in a small hatchback, and he was doing burnouts and hollering, so I got my machine gun and chased him out of his car and down to the creek. He was about to get away when I asked my best friend from primary school if he had a gun I could borrow, which he did, but when I went to continue the chase I realised that it was only a tiny wooden gun on a key ring... and my adversary had a huge sledgehammer.

Somewhere along the line I got my machine gun back and my adversary jumped into the creek, I fired two grenades from the under slung grenade launcher - which missed - and two bursts of gunfire before I ran out of ammo. My adversary turned into a woman who I have had a crush on for the past month, and tried coming up for air. Despite protests from various standers-by, I beat her/him to death with the butt of my gun.

I remember thinking that drowning was a terrible way to die, and I don't know if the death was caused by drowning or being beaten with a gun.

[ThrashO]

I had a dream that me and my room mate and his brother went to the beach and were going to camp there, while getting wood for a fire my room mates brother buried himself in a huge pile of sand except for his head sticking out. And the ol' butter fingers I am I crushed his head with a huge rock.

I didnt know what to say to my room mate so I just buried him deeper and told him I didnt know where he went.

Then I accidently killed my room mate the same way. wierd shit.

[Mad Melvin]

I dreamt that Porcupine Tree came to play in my town. The gig was in this sleazy and cheap nighclub for some reason. I was still excited, 'cause i've liked the band for years and was hoping to hear some new material.

And I did.

The gig was on the dance floor and there was no one else from the band expect the lead singer, Steven Wilson. DJ announced him on the stage and he came to the dance floor with a microphone and started rapping about "Big booty bitches" and proceeded to make some awkward brakedance moves. I was so dissapointed and embarrassed for him, that I just wanted to get out of there as fast as possible, but all of the exits were locked. Thank god I woke up, so I didn't have to see the rest of the show.

[LordSappington]

I had a dream last night, in which I somehow acquired an old warehouse. For some reason, it had all the stuff for a brewery inside, as well as stuff for a bakery and coffeeshop, so I let my friend take over the brewery and my girlfriend the bakery and coffeeshop. Then, I started off selling all-organic tomatoes, and used the profit to buy apples, and the next thing I knew I had like the most successful organic superstore in the world.
I've been working too much.

[Kitsa]

Originally Posted by LordSappington

I had a dream last night, in which I somehow acquired an old warehouse. For some reason, it had all the stuff for a brewery inside, as well as stuff for a bakery and coffeeshop, so I let my friend take over the brewery and my girlfriend the bakery and coffeeshop. Then, I started off selling all-organic tomatoes, and used the profit to buy apples, and the next thing I knew I had like the most successful organic superstore in the world.
I've been working too much.

Sounds like you're playing Farmville too much.

[Fathom Zero]

I had a dream where I was in a band with RoG and he was playing the saxophone and I was playing a bass. It was a Morphine dream or something.

I suppose I should stop listening to music while I sleep.

[Pentegarn]

Last night I dreamed I was on a softball rec team with most of the 1984 Detroit Tigers.

Lance Parrish and Kirk Gibson weren't on the team though, so I played right field and kept insisting we needed a fat guy to play catcher because (in the dream I thought this for some reason) "fat guys make good softball catchers"

[Kitsa]

Had a really fucked-up dream last night. I was going to visit my great-grandmother, who's been dead for 15 or so years. She was living in a really filthy house and being cared for by two distant cousins of mine, who seemed to have a real problem with me visiting and were sort of bitchy and trying to get me out of there.

There were cats all over the place (she never had cats?), and piles of cat-shit and those hairballs that sort of look like flat gray cat-shit. One of the cats was groomed like a scottie-dog and was this weird, vivid shade of purple. I picked it up and it had purple eyes, too. I remarked how weird and beautiful it was and that I'd never seen a purple cat before.

She said, "Well, you can take that one home with you." And I was protesting because I never meant I wanted to TAKE her purple cat, I was just admiring it. But she insisted and was getting out a cage or something for me to take it back home in.

I was helping her look when I found a slip of paper that said "Be Frank Zappa for a day." I picked it up and instantly inhabited Frank Zappa's body. I mean, I looked down and here was this hairy male body in black pants and a wifebeater. I looked in the mirror, and damned if I wasn't Frank Zappa.

And then I woke up.

[executioneer]

well except for the neglected great-grandmother that sounds like a goddamn awesome dream

[Pentegarn]

Originally Posted by Kitsa

Had a really fucked-up dream last night. I was going to visit my great-grandmother, who's been dead for 15 or so years. She was living in a really filthy house and being cared for by two distant cousins of mine, who seemed to have a real problem with me visiting and were sort of bitchy and trying to get me out of there.

There were cats all over the place (she never had cats?), and piles of cat-shit and those hairballs that sort of look like flat gray cat-shit. One of the cats was groomed like a scottie-dog and was this weird, vivid shade of purple. I picked it up and it had purple eyes, too. I remarked how weird and beautiful it was and that I'd never seen a purple cat before.

She said, "Well, you can take that one home with you." And I was protesting because I never meant I wanted to TAKE her purple cat, I was just admiring it. But she insisted and was getting out a cage or something for me to take it back home in.

I was helping her look when I found a slip of paper that said "Be Frank Zappa for a day." I picked it up and instantly inhabited Frank Zappa's body. I mean, I looked down and here was this hairy male body in black pants and a wifebeater. I looked in the mirror, and damned if I wasn't Frank Zappa.

And then I woke up.

The dream was mundane till that last paragraph, then it became hilarious

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Dream - every hour I worked would unlock 1 minute of tv watching. Every word someone said to me while watching tv drained my account by an additional minute. My gf was talking to me and zeroed out my tv time of an hour show to five minutes of it.

[Otto]

A recurring theme in my dreams lately has been me meeting celebrities. But not like your average plastic-faced movie stars, rather, I keep dreaming about weird situations with the likes of Tom Waits, The Green Man (whose legend used to be the subject of multiple childhood nightmares), Tor Johnson, and Robert Crumb.

My two favorites are:

Getting in a fight with Tor Johnson, initiated when sneezed on me and I smashed a bottle of bourbon on his head which made him scream "ED WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOU!" and drop-kick me into a pile of oil drums.

Tom Waits and myself riding a gigantic antique Electrolux vacuum cleaner down a crowded street while he spits on, and cusses at people who get in the way.

[10,000 Volt Ghost]

Originally Posted by Otto

Getting in a fight with Tor Johnson, initiated when sneezed on me and I smashed a bottle of bourbon on his head which made him scream "ED WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOU!" and drop-kick me into a pile of oil drums.

Originally Posted by Esuohlim

What does mean when you dream about murdering a whole basement full of people you've never met?

I even picked up a rocking chair and crushed someone's neck with it

Let the violence commence.

[Otto]

Originally Posted by 10,000 Volt Ghost

Let the violence commence.

As soon as I woke up I was like "Fuck, why did I do that? He was a goddamned wrestler."

[LordSappington]

This one's just full of random, stupid shit.
It starts off with me working at Randall's, except my manager is now a pretty nice black man, and the store is a bit different. Someone decided to mix the salads in the cold case together, so we had stuff like broccoli salad and potato salad mixed in, and I was just serving it because I didn't even care anymore. While I was doing stuff, people would walk behind the counters and lift the glass case and just serve themselves stuff from it, and I was getting pissed at them for it, and went on lunch. In the break room, the World's Littlest Mouse was trying to put a blue hat away, and couldn't reach, so I helped him put it up. Then I realized, "Hey, Littlest Mouse, you're not a mouse at all! You're a damn spider!", and he got upset and said "Don't tell anyone or I'll get fired! No one else knows I'm a spider!", so I didn't tell anyone because he was a cool guy.
"So I'm on lunch and trying to find the Wendy's, but first I end up in an Applebee's, and then a Lowe's. Eventually, I gave up and started heading home, where I ran into my girlfriend, who was wearing some sort of shirt made out of bubblewrap, but not transparent. She was talking about how she had a sticker on her back that she didn't want to take off because it hurt, and I kept trying to take it off her and she would freak out. We went back to my house, and my dad had what looked like a fly tattoo on his eyebrow. I asked him about it, and He said "They're stitches; I hit my head on the microwave today." I looked over at the microwave, which had a comically sized dent on the top of it.
That was about when I woke up. How the fuck do our brains come up with this crap?

[Supafly345]

I had a dream where one of the women from Grey's Anatomy (she was an anonymous generic woman, as I have never seen the show, I just knew she was from grey's somehow) was also Dr House from house. And I saw her take off her hair and put on a house costume and suddenly she looked like Dr House. However when she changed back to the woman from Grey's, she just looked like House with a blond wig on.

BTW: I haven't seen the show House since its first season.

[creeposaurus]

I had a dream I was watching my dying relative being eaten alive by red ants. They were crawling in and out of him carrying little chunks of his meat. It looked like parts of his body were deflated and shit. Weird.