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Ninjavenom Ninjavenom is offline
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 03:37 AM        The Apostrophe - Grammars Outcast
Why is it that the use of the apostrophe has declined over the past years? What is so hard about typing that one extra key? Is the rule too hard, maybe? "How do i know where to put it?" a young moron may find himself asking one day. Gee, it's not like it's been drilled into his brain since first grade that it shows ownership, now has it? Oh, is that, like, when someone owns something, you put it in their name BEFORE THE "S"?

Honestly, WHAT THE FUCK? Is it that fucking hard to use that little tickmark in a word? Shit, people aren't even using it in their signs and advertisements anymore. If Edna owns the cafe, it's Edna's, not EDNAS.

Or, what about the guy that abuses the shit out of the apostrophe? If there's plurality involved, he just chunks the ' before the "s" at the end. Boy, do i sure wish this guy well. It's Goats, not Goat's. A pack of wild mountain GOATS, not a pack of wild mountain GOAT'S.

OR COMMA HATER. I HATE COMMA HATER. What is so goddamn tough about using the tiny little tickmarks in your everyday language that makes you desire to write so it's FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE TO READ? If i had a nickel for every review i had to add an apostrophe or comma to, i sure as hell wouldn't be working for free anymore.

Or, what about I DON'T CAPITALIZE THINGS GUY? Die, die, die, die, die. I hope that I DON'T CAPITALIZE THINGS GUY festers in his own vomit as he lays in his death bed, suffering from a horrible case of Leprosy and Severe Butt Rot.

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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 03:50 AM       
ur views on the world are too cynical for my classy humorical tasties
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 04:04 AM       
lol, grammar's outcast

-willie
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 04:32 AM       
When NinjaVenom first came to the boards, I was going to make a character to make fun of him. I had an awsome name planned out, I forgot what it was. It was like SamaruiDart or something gay. Yeah, it wasn't awsome. But neither are you.

And I'm awsome. Inside.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 04:36 AM       


-willie
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 06:37 AM       
I wish I could kill all people who use a capital letter at the start of every word, or even type in alternating caps, to be "different". I'd like to throw sharp metal models of capital letters at them.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 06:39 AM       
I'd like to stuff the wooden models with a lot of splinters of the words that they mis-spelled down the stupid throats of those stupid sons of bitches.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 07:35 AM       
I hate it when people tell you not to type in caps because it's improper "netiquette".

That is SO retarded!
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 07:42 AM       
People who use the word "netiquette" should be beaten to death by a large man holding a teacup in his left hand, with his pinky pointing up.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 10:59 AM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by FS
I wish I could kill all people who use a capital letter at the start of every word.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 12:55 PM       
i was just going to say :<
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 01:01 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by FS
People who use the word "netiquette" should be beaten to death by a large man holding a teacup in his left hand, with his pinky pointing up.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 01:28 PM        re
I think it's punctuations outcast.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 02:04 PM       
People don't even realize what the apostraphe means, anymore. It's used to show missing text and letters. When we use it in the possesive, for example, it shows missing hi from his or her from hers. In old English, they used to say, that is Bob his book. Then they started saying Bob's. Or that is Sally hers tampon. Then it became Sally's tampon. It's not that hard of a concept, if people would just realize that, perhaps essays and such would be much better and less pissing me off.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 02:54 PM       
Ninjavenom, stop being a whiny little bitch. If the meaning of a statement is obvious, whether or not it adheres to textbook grammar is beside the point. Does it really offend you that much? Do you feel so compelled to protect the sanctity of the English language that it gets your panties all in a bunch when you see a misplaced apostrophe or two? Loser.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 03:02 PM       
mike, your mere presence is offensive. shut up and get the fuck out of here, you sniveling little bitch.

also, i'm so emotional and shit about this whole apostrophe-support thread that i can't even respond. i shall. let me get myself together tonight, as i sing rock and blues for the drunk wedding party ON THE LAKE and drink lots of CHAMPAGNE. venom:
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 03:02 PM        Re: The Apostrophe - Grammars Outcast
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ninjavenom
"How do i know where to put it?" a young moron may find himself asking one day.


Or, what about I DON'T CAPITALIZE THINGS GUY? Die, die, die, die, die. I hope that I DON'T CAPITALIZE THINGS GUY festers in his own vomit as he lays in his death bed, suffering from a horrible case of Leprosy and Severe Butt Rot.

Hmmm, well now, a little bit of self-hatred going on here, I see...
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 03:41 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by sadie
mike, your mere presence is offensive. shut up and get the fuck out of here, you sniveling little bitch.
Uh....No thanks
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 04:09 PM       
That's the problem, Mike. This gets under my skin very much because when apostrophes are not used or are used improperly, they completely bastardize the meaning of the sentence, rendering it nearly illegible. When i can't read a sentence because of the lacking commas or apostrophes, the spelling errors become compounded and the sentence becomes one big pile of grammatical shit. The saddest part here is that the foreign guys who post here have grammar and english far better than some of the other idiots on the internet. For shit's sake, even Retro Kat knows how to use them! I don't see what's so tough about using an apostrophe to make your sentences a little easier on people to read.

The comma is also forgotten often in the english language. It's used to serparate ideas. Whoa now, think you can handle that, computer-using America? Think you can comprehend how to use the comma correctly? Are you, sure it's not, too hard for you, to learn?

Everyone fucks up sometimes, but for crissakes, you can't just ignore the fucking apostrophe! It's like swapping every letter "s" from now on with "z". Utterly retarded, i hope everyone guilty of this is sent to taiwan sodomy camps, where they will stay for the rest of their lives.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 06:33 PM       
Can we discuss the semi-colon and the colon next, and maybe the hyphen dashinator?
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Ninjavenom Ninjavenom is offline
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 07:14 PM       
Those are used FAR less in english than the comma and apostrophe.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 07:19 PM       
I would like to know their proper usage, I'm afraid I may have forgotten.

Can we have a thread for teaching math and physics too?
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 07:22 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chojin
uh, what?
Allow me to demonstrate.

Beowulf, in Old English:

Hwæt! We Gardena in geardagum,
þeodcyninga, þrym gefrunon,
hu ða æþelingas ellen fremedon.
Oft Scyld Scefing sceaþena þreatum,
monegum mægþum, meodosetla ofteah,
egsode eorlas. Syððan ærest wearð
feasceaft funden, he þæs frofre gebad,
weox under wolcnum, weorðmyndum þah,
oðþæt him æghwylc þara ymbsittendra
ofer hronrade hyran scolde,
gomban gyldan. þæt wæs god cyning!


Chaucer's Canterbury Tales, in Middle English:

Whilom, as olde stories tellen us,
Ther was a duc that highte Theseus;
Of Atthenes he was lord and governour,
And in his tyme swich a conquerour,
That gretter was ther noon under the sonne.
Ful many a riche contree hadde he wonne,
What with his wysdom and his chivalrie;
He conquered al the regne of Femenye,
That whilom was ycleped Scithia,
And weddede the queene Ypolita,
And broghte hir hoom with hym in his contree,
With muchel glorie and greet solempnytee,
And eek hir yonge suster Emelye.

Shakespeare's Hamlet, in Early Modern English:

Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow
of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: he hath
borne me on his back a thousand times; and now, how
abhorred in my imagination it is! my gorge rims at
it. Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know
not how oft. Where be your gibes now? your
gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment,
that were wont to set the table on a roar? Not one
now, to mock your own grinning? quite chap-fallen?
Now get you to my lady's chamber, and tell her, let
her paint an inch thick, to this favour she must
come; make her laugh at that. Prithee, Horatio, tell
me one thing.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 07:42 PM       
The colon is used to dictate the beginning of a list or to show an example.

-Things to do tomorrow:
-I.E.:

The semicolon is used to show the separation of two loosely related
things or ideas.

-In the jungle we found a Triceratops; it cost us several hundred dollars worth of gasoline and supplies.

The hyphen is used when you want to combine two nouns, or two other unrelated words.

- Peudo-intellectual
- Spider-Man

Does that help, smartass?

I kind of failed math, though.

Also, if i met someone who used Jen's example, i'd more than likely begin saving money for an uzi and a bus ride.
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Old Jul 4th, 2003, 08:38 PM       
Ottawa:

A castle, some trees and a lot of red flowers.

Welcome to Canada.
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