Features

executioneer · #26

no way it totally costs money one way or another

-willie

sadie · #27

not if you love yourself.

Dixie · #28

lotion costs money too. unless you steal it from hotel bathrooms.

executioneer · #29

TP costs money

-willie

Dixie · #30

real men use thier socks

executioneer · #31

socks cost way more money than TP :/

-willie

Dixie · #32

but they're re-usable! and you never HAVE to wash them!

executioneer · #33

you can FLUSH tp

i don't want no jizz smell lingering around my bedroom thank you

-willie

Dixie · #34

it's sexy. girls can't say "no" to old sperm.

executioneer · #35

well I don't like the smell

-willie

Dixie · #36

i'm sorry, i can't have sex with you now.

executioneer · #37

:'(

-willie

Dixie · #38

relationships are hard, see? you've got to compromise.

Mr. Vagiclean · #39

DON'T WORRY WILL, I WILL FUCK YOU

executioneer · #40

I PAID MONEY NOW I JUST NEED TO THINK OG SOM ETHING CLEVAR TO SAY

-willie

executioneer · #41

SIMULCAS T ON IMOCKERY AND MINDSAY

-willie

Pee Wee Herman · #42

WHAT THE FUCK. YOU PAID MONEY FOR THIS?!?!

FUCKING IDIOT.

Just go hang out at your local college or university if you're in you're late teens or twenties. That's usually a good place to pick up chicks.

executioneer · #43

taste my nads pee wee herman don't you think I'd be doing that if I could

-willie

Pee Wee Herman · #44

Why can't you just hang out at your local university or college to pick up chicks or guys. You don't have to be a student to hang out there. Just walk up to random chicks and somehow initiate a conversation. Whatever you do, don't use pickup lines. The safest way to do it would be to walk up to them and say "Hi, I'm Willie."

I'm just trying to help you out here. But what the fuck, man. You paid 20 or 25 bucks to contact this chick.

executioneer · #45

i can't talk to people in person I'm shy

do you think I heckle peopl eon the street in real life, no i have to do it on a message board

-willie

Pee Wee Herman · #46

I used to be shy too, but I got over it. The best way to get over it is to realize that if she doesn't like you or gives you wierd looks, move on to the next chick. When you first meet a chick, the conversation can be about almost anything (Within reason. Don't share morbid fantasies or creepy shit.). I find that the best way to start the conversation is by making an observation about them. Anything about them, except their looks or clothes, because if you ask them about their clothes, they'll think you're gay. Seriously. In the conversation, ask them open ended questions. If a chick blows you off, it's their loss.

For example:

Willie sees a hot chick.
Willie walks up to the chick.
Willie: Hi. I'm Willie.
Girl: Uh, I'm Ashley.
Willie: I see you're reading a psychology textbook. Are you a psychology student?
Girl: Yes, I am.
Willie: How long have you been going to university for?
Girl: 2 years.

It's that simple. You just have to realize that you have nothing to lose so it is completely fucking pointless to not talk to girls in real life. Besides, you'll never get laid if you don't try.