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  #1  
n0skillz gamer n0skillz gamer is offline
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Old Feb 23rd, 2003, 01:36 AM        Caught Masturbating
This may seem like an odd question but... FUCK YOU! anyay, if you ever been caught masturbating talk about it here!
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  #2  
James James is offline
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Old Feb 23rd, 2003, 01:38 AM       
I think Loveline is where we will talk about our masturbation, thank you.
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  #3  
n0skillz gamer n0skillz gamer is offline
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Old Feb 23rd, 2003, 01:43 AM       
lol, sorry bout that, nice avatar by the way :/
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  #4  
GnrySgtHartman GnrySgtHartman is offline
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Old Feb 23rd, 2003, 01:48 AM       
LOL
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  #5  
Mystic_Powers Mystic_Powers is offline
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Old Feb 23rd, 2003, 02:22 AM       
this one time i was in the living room when no one was home i as watching the little boy malesting channel so of course i started wacking off them my dad walked in he said on your knees boy. I was liek OMG then i started to liek it and i got into it. Then of course my hoe of a mom walked in and ruined it and kicked me out. I hope that hoe dies i hadn't even comed yet when she kicked me out. But its ok i whent to my room crawled out the window and whent to my neighbors house where old mrs johnson lives. Shes 84 by the way. Well i was liek of yea and she said on your knees and eat the muffin. She had an old wrinckly crusty puntang. It was all dry so i had to put alot of lub on it just to eat it out but its ok. After about 10 minutes we switches and my dad walked in and he said on your knees boy and i said im all ready on my knees. So he said ok well just lick my balls i was like ok then for soem strange reason after lickign his balls i whent and ate a snake cake and i cumed in my paints from easing a snake cake well thats my imberrrasing story i hope it made ya kill your self !!! thanks again. If u just read this u shoudl be shot in the face
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  #6  
Malevolent Malevolent is offline
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Old Feb 23rd, 2003, 06:23 AM       
You lack the opposable thumbs necessary to grip your cock.
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  #7  
Darryl Darryl is offline
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Old Feb 23rd, 2003, 09:18 AM       

Carni, I am impressed that you could analyze his typing style and arrive at that conclusion.
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  #8  
Jixby PhiIIips Jixby PhiIIips is offline
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Old Feb 24th, 2003, 12:21 PM       
one time my mom caught me putting a bottle up my ass.. she got mad and smashed it over my head.. my boner went away to
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  #9  
Jixby Phillips Jixby Phillips is offline
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Old Feb 24th, 2003, 01:17 PM       
WAIT A SECOND!!!
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  #10  
slavemason slavemason is offline
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Old Feb 24th, 2003, 03:31 PM       
The thing I hate most about my new job is there aren't any good places to jerk off. I've always managed to find a nice spot or dozen at my other jobs but the new one is too crowded. I think that's why I stick around I-Mockery.
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  #11  
Rez Rez is offline
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Old Mar 1st, 2003, 03:25 PM       
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jixby PhiIIips
one time my mom caught me putting a bottle up my ass.. she got mad and smashed it over my head.. my boner went away to


dammit, people are trying to look at whatsofunny...
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  #12  
Skulhedface Skulhedface is offline
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Old Mar 2nd, 2003, 02:01 AM       
"Caught Masturbating".

One suggestion: MOVE OUT OF YOUR PARENTS' HOUSE.
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  #13  
Captain Robo Captain Robo is offline
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Old Mar 2nd, 2003, 08:24 PM       
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  #14  
Raize Raize is offline
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Old Mar 14th, 2003, 11:31 AM        No
No, but I've caught people.

The best way to handle the situation is to constantly talk about it, including the small size of their penis/breasts.
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  #15  
Skulhedface Skulhedface is offline
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Old Mar 14th, 2003, 03:20 PM       
Call me kooky, but if you're going to pick on someone for having a small penis, wouldn't it make more sense to say also he has BIG breasts?
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  #16  
soundtest soundtest is offline
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Old Mar 14th, 2003, 11:27 PM       
DAMN YOU CHUN LI AND YOUR IRRESISTABLE ASS
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  #17  
Bod Bod is offline
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Old Mar 15th, 2003, 08:48 AM       
Never been caught wanking as I'm too subtle, but I've been caught shagging plenty of times. A few times in a park, once on a dissused bridge (seems it was still in use) and once in a firestation. Wouldja believe the alarm went off and all the firemen turned up!
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  #18  
The Retro Kat The Retro Kat is offline
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Old Mar 15th, 2003, 03:39 PM       
I was caught once, then it splurged out in her face.
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Gas and masturbation are highly unlikely to be connected with each other. Have you tried to stop masturbating? Has the gas subsided as a result? Perhaps you could try the same experiment by increasing the times you masturbate daily. Do you notice that the gas is increasing?
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  #19  
kirkis kirkis is offline
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Old Mar 15th, 2003, 11:54 PM       
I wasn't caught masturbating, but i was caught watching porn and about to masturbate. I was watching porn, then i paused it and when to get a rag, and i came back and my dad was right there. yeah. my boner was gone in a sec.
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  #20  
cenamalo cenamalo is offline
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Old Mar 16th, 2003, 12:26 AM       
never got caught (i lock my friggin door) but once i was doing it and my tennis coach called me. i didn't know what he wanted so i kept going. that's about when i realized i needed to stop, and i actually quit masturbating a week later. 1year, 6months and counting. my friends got a pool to see when i'll bust
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  #21  
soundtest soundtest is offline
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Old Mar 16th, 2003, 12:54 PM       
sounds like a hilarious contest! somebody should really make a show about that!!
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  #22  
kellychaos kellychaos is offline
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Old Apr 3rd, 2003, 01:15 PM       
What? ... like you got it caught in a vegetable ... or a vice?
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  #23  
The Unseen The Unseen is offline
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Old Apr 3rd, 2003, 03:27 PM       
I never get caught, i am a ninja so i hide in the shadows
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  #24  
Dixie Dixie is offline
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Old Apr 3rd, 2003, 04:45 PM       
my boyfriend caught me once, he asked why i hid the fact i did that. i asked why wasn't he mad. the answer came shortly after i did. apparently he wants to watch when i do. i'm good with that.
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  #25  
Cybernetico Cybernetico is offline
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Old Apr 3rd, 2003, 06:02 PM       
............

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