The Many Uses For A
Vegan/Vegetarian Pamphlet

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If you haven't been handed a pamphlet by a self-righteous animal rights activist yet, chances are you will at some point in your life. I was recently given the above pamphlet entitled, "Why Vegan?" I had quite a chuckle speaking with the person who handed it to me as I was eating a beefy burger. The lad actually thought he was going to make me stop eating my hamburger, when I explained to him about my Meatatarian ways, he called me an asshole and walked away all steamed.

I was left with with the pamphlet though. What was I to do with it? Just throw it out? No way! How could I polute this earth that I adore so much? (bwahahah! yeah right). Well, I thought to myself, "What else could I use this thing for?" Soon I had a ton of ideas and I tried them out and found out that there are MANY uses for a vegan/vegetarian pamphlet! I figured I'd share these uses with all of you so that when you are handed a pamphlet you can make good use of it.

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The first thing that came to mind was a paper airplane.
Sure it's simple, but it's a fun little toy and if you're lucky,
you just might peg an activist in the head with it!

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Ah confetti, what's a party without confetti?
Just run the pamplet through a paper shredder a
few times and you'll be the life of your next party!

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Why wipe your feet on your nice doormat when you can
wipe your feet on vegan propaganda!? Symbolic and fun!

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Is it cold outside? What better way to get that campfire going
than with some good ol' vegan kindle. Vegans are easily ignited.

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Once you're done chopping up those juicy steaks of yours, why
not use the vegan pamphlet to wipe your knife clean!?

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Did you spill your soda? Don't fret! Use your Vegan Pamphlet!
It's the quicker picker upper!

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And of course, when you just don't have enough
toilet paper to wipe your ass clean, you can use
your trusty vegan pamphlet to get the job done!

Well that's all for now folks, but I'm sure I'll think of more ideas and when I do I'll be sure to share them with you all! If you've got an idea, feel free to share it with me! I'd love to hear all about it! Who knows, it might get used on this page and then you'll be famous! Wow!