|
You open the Happy
Days lunchbox and...
...in a flash, find
yourself standing in the middle of Arnold's. Grinning like a fool, Ralph
Malph gets in your face.
"Hey there, gooberface! Bet you were expecting to see the Fonz, right?
Well, instead you get the Ralphster, buddy! What a gasser! Nyah
nyah nyah!"
"Back off, Malph." you promptly reply. "I hate you. The only episode you
were funny in was when you got hypnotized to think you were tough, and
kept pissing off the Fonz by calling him 'Artie'. And the only reason
that was funny was because I expected you to get your ass kicked. WHICH
YOU DIDN'T. SCHMUCK. So hit the bricks before I collapse that king-size
forehead of yours with my FIST."
Ralph Malph's face seems to shrivel up like a prune, and he runs off to
the girls' bathroom in a crying fit with Potsie on his heels. You glance
around. Considering the fact that Al hasn't snuck up on you and bashed
your brains in with a 2x4 while muttering "yeah, yeah, yeah..." you
assume you've made the correct choice. You're left to wonder where you
go from here. A whining tone alerts you to the presence of Richie
Cunningham, who stands glaring at you with his hands on his sides.
"Now see here, goon." Richie says, nostrils flaring. "That wasn't very
nice of you... AT ALL."
"Out of my way, gingerbread." you say, and shove him into a pile of
dirty dinner trays. The clumsy Richie impales himself on a fork, and
dies a bloody death. The whole of Arnold's explodes... with cheer and
applause, and some familiar sounding laughter.
"Bravo!!" Mr. and Mrs.
C say. "That was kickass!" Howard Cunningham adds. Well, you're a hero,
but what's next? The voice in the museum suggested that you'd find your
way to Popeye's Chicken & Biscuits here, but though killing Richie was
thoroughly entertaining, you're not going to get any closer to
Pestilential Pete's treasure just standing here. Time to make your move.
You decide to:
|
