You open the Lassie lunchbox and...

...find yourself magically transported to a seedy studio where everything smells of Vaseline. You probably were expecting to be torn apart by ravenous collies when you picked this lunchbox, but this is apparently not your lucky day. It seems time has left its marks on the once endearing collie movie business. Straddled on the "gutter" set is Lassie, who now has to make a living by posing for hardcore furrie porn. You scream and look around for a doorway out of here, but there is none. You are stuck here. Forever. You struggle to cling to your sanity up until the moment when Lassie bares all, and thus the urge to claw out your eyeballs becomes too great to resist.

START OVER, YOU IDIOT!