Who the hell is
knocking on my coffin, can't you see I'm trying to get some sleep in
here!? Oh it's you. Lemme guess, you want me to tell you another spooky
story. Well, I suppose a story is in order... after all, Halloween has
arrived once again to terrify and titillate your sweet fangs... er...
teeth! Last year, myself and the other I-Mockery staff
members brought you another Halloween "Select Your Destiny"
story, "Paradise Nightmare!" Once again, we hope that this
year's story will surpass it both in terms of entertainment and uh...
madness. Yep, MADNESS! Mind-crushing, throat-stomping,
spleen-squashing MADNESS!
For those of you who
are unacquainted with these stories, allow
me to give you a quick refresher on how these "Select Your
Destiny"
things work. YOU get to determine what happens to your character
in the story. So if you chose to have your character "cockpunch
Hulk Hogan" and it ends up killing you, it's your own damned fault.
If you haven't already read them, you might also want to check out some
of our previous Halloween "Select Your Destiny" stories from yesteryear.
This year, we've
returned with a story so ungodly... so demonic... so goretastically
grotesque that you'll vomit up the remains of your grandma that you ate
for dinner last night just by reading it. You'll soon be wandering the
streets as a brainwashed, helpless freak, mumbling incoherent babblings
about "that story you read online" while parents point at you and tell
their kids, "This is what happens when you read I-Mockery." A
total mindrape and much more awaits you on the following pages, and yet
here you are, still reading instead of making a run for the hills like
any logical person would do. So
you think you're a tough guy eh? Well then Mister Tough Guy, I guess it's time to dive into our
2006 "Select Your
Destiny" Halloween masterpiece...