Vintage Halloween Cards: Part 3
by: -RoG-

It's been a while since I've featured some more vintage Halloween cards, and since you guys enjoyed the previous two installments so much and kept asking for more, I decided it was high time to showcase some more of 'em. I've collected another two pages worth of these crazy old Halloween cards from yesteryear, so let's dive right into this latest batch!

Oh look! It's that most recognizable symbol of Halloween - a giant albino owl!

And you "auto" not drive while on acid. I see those eyes!

Actually, if both candles stay lit, a vampire bat will come drop a load of guano in your jack-o-lantern's nasal cavity.

Nothing makes for a thrilling Halloween quite like a trio of pumpkin ghosts having just raped flying black cats in the sky.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but witches don't traditionally attach fake Bambi heads to
the end of their broomsticks or have white cats as pets, right? Didn't think so.

It's Halloween! You know what that means!
Yep! It's time to dress up like a clown and a witch and bust out the ol' jump rope!

You can almost picture that sad little pumpkin saying, "Please kill him! Kill him with fire!"

The Devil will gladly drop his pitchfork to seize the opportunity to have a
pumpkin man help shove an archaic fleshlight onto his crotch.

If you think the girl is up to anything but no good, you're a fool.
Those are probably fake apples floating in a vat of acid that you're about to dip your face into.

I'm all for trying to scare people, but was it really necessary for that one goblin to moon this couple?
Also, the actual moon is really enjoying sniffing that poor woman's ass. Creepy.

Always ride in style on Halloween.

Little did they realize, Batman was hiding patiently in the background, waiting for the perfect moment to strike.

Looks like somebody overslept through Halloween and awoke on Christmas instead. Moron.

If "good luck" equates to meeting twin pumpkinhead pieces of red corn on the cob witches,
I think I'll take my chances with seeing the old owl instead.

If only I had a dime for every single time I've seen this same old scenario take place on Halloween...

Moments later, she was burned alive for wearing a witch cape and standing with her back to a roaring fireplace.

Roads? Where we're going, we don't need roads.

There are still more Vintage Halloween Cards to see!
Click here to continue onward to page 2!


Reader Comments

Click here to return to the Features homepage