NEW SHORT: "The Poetry of Max Burbank part 2"

[Mockery]

Alright hepcats, Max is back with some more street jive for you to get your groove on with. Can you dig? Yyyyyeah...

http://www.i-mockery.com/shorts/boxes/maxpoems2-box.gif (http://www.i-mockery.com/shorts/maxpoems2)
NEW SHORT: "The Poetry of Max Burbank part 2"
http://www.i-mockery.com/shorts/maxpoems2

Enjoy!

[Immortal Goat]

Why is even the reular site concoring words? The poems don't flow like they should, especially in the "Popeye's Lament" one. One-eyed troused snake my dick.

[mburbank]

DAMN! Probably a function of the fact I PM'd him these poems.

Thanks for drawing my attention to it, I shall email him the changes.

[sspadowsky]

Pretty fuckin' good!

Ain't no Donny Rumsfeld, mind you, but then, who is?

Still, pretty fuckin' good. :)

[Sojourn]

Excellent work. I see no flaws in something from the heart, or even other areas of the anatomy.

[mburbank]

There are very few changes, just three in fact. Mock will restore them tonight. 'Bloody' and 'arse' are not from my venacular and I'd never use them in poetry unless I was invoking someoen elses voice.

'One eyed trouser snake', while amusing, renders the sentence meaningless, as idiomatically 'you don't know one eyed trouser snake' doesn't say what I meant it to.

Also, as Goat pointed out, it queers the rythmn.

However, I think the mess up is pretty funny.

Chubuwumba.

[Immortal Goat]

Glad to have helped. :)

[opel]

very nice stuff :)

[Jixby Phillips]

well now you can play it on the radio ;_;