Sorry little boy, you have to be this tall to be allowed to be on this site.

I can always wear platforms ^ ^;

Name- Wiffles
Age-13
Location- Japan, I wish ;_;
Intersts- Anime, videogames and hanging around the internet

Yay! ^ ^

There's a steady crop of younger newbs coming in lately.....

oh god PLEASE don't turn this site into a high school newletter, oh please oh please oh please....

What makes you "old school"?

Did I ever say I WAS? :rolleyes

OK, fine, I'll play along. Would the term "NEWERBIES" help you stop wetting your Huggies?

I may be 13, but I can act just as stupid as you ^.~

No, but you still shouldn't call someone else a newbie. Thats like making fun of someone who is mentally ill and you yourself are also mentally ill.

And diaper jokes? How old are you? 12?

:lol You know, half of your retorts would be funny if they didn't apply to yourself as well. Because so far, the accusations of NOT being funny and ass-kissing and all DO OBVIOUSLY NOT apply to you :rolleyes

Now, since I come to I-Mockery for reasons other than to tell everyone else over a computer how much they suck or are not funny, I'll see ya around. Retort if you want, but all it'll mean is that SOMEONE is too whiny to let an argument die.

So that means I expect to see about five replies from you for this :lol

Sorry Charlie, I have nothing to say to your attempt at a comeback :). Bye :).

Name- Jack T. Chick
Age- eternity
job- torturing the souls of the normal
where you at?- hell
why did you start posting- to SA-VE SO-U-U-ULS!
how long have you been on the board- See my profile
hobbies- Video games and stuff
fav. music/band- Rob zombie
fav. book- The Bible of Death
fav. movie- I dunno
Who do you hate the most on this board- I dunno
what is that smell-Devils and Death!
And Evangelions!

Name- Martha.
Age- 17.
job- I work at a candy store.
where you at?- Massachusetts.
why did you start posting- Because davinxtk (my boyfriend) introduced me to this place and i liked it.
how long have you been on the board- A couple days...yeah yeah, throw the insults.
hobbies- reading, writing, picking my nose
fav. music/band- guster, idlewild, neutral milk hotel
fav. book- A Clockwork Orange
fav. movie- ^ditto.
Who do you hate the most on this board- I don't know anyone yet.
what is that smell- Probably me.

Name- Sef Joosten (it's Dutch, so shut up, assmonkey)

Age- 14

job- hired assassin, currently under contract to kill you.

where you at?- Steyl, Limburg, Holland, Europe, the World, the Solar System, your Ass.

why did you start posting- because I thought this board was funny.

how long have you been on the board- since beginning of 2002, I think

hobbies- surfin' the net, insulting people, drawing, etc.

fav. music/band- Rammstein!

fav. book- The Stand, by Stephen King

fav. movie- Evil Dead 2, and The Matrix

Who do you hate the most on this board- feelevil, because he's a gaylord.

what is that smell- Napalm, I just waxed my previous victim. You're next.

Wow, you're only 1 year older than me ^_^

http://image1ex.villagephotos.com/pu...sp?id_=2027290

JANITOR KING!

Sumthin Died...
 

Name- EJ (Dont let the name Randy Fisk throw you, I'm a girl alright)
Age- 18
job- I am an unemployed suffering Artist wanna make sumthin of it?? :maul
where you at?- The depths of Hell, why do you ask?
why did you start posting- Because it seemed like a good idea at the time, much like running a rusty fork into my eye.
how long have you been on the board- Since today really
hobbies- Art, making "To Kill" lists, writing generally insane rubbish and criticizing things I neither understand nor have any business talking about
fav. music/band- I like a lot of things, like Nirvana, and Hole and The Cure and other things too
fav. book- Currently "Brave New World", ha, soon we'll be living the dream...
fav. movie- I liked "Maid in Manhattan", its not my favorite though, mock me yes, but when it comes down to it, I really want to fuck J-Lo. I also like the crappiness of "Logan's Run" ah carousel, is it really such a bad idea? :goth
Who do you hate the most on this board- I dont know anyone well enough yet...
what is that smell- Sumthin died, but dont worry, once the elves burn the body, it'll go away.

Name-
Nic
Age-
21
job-
SMD
where you at?-
an apartment in DC
why did you start posting-
bc metal mockery looked like fun
how long have you been on the board-
since december 2001 i think
hobbies-
masturbation
fav. music/band-
metal, heavy METAL! fav band is carnivore
fav. book-
those little pamphlets that come in tampon boxes
fav. movie-
petey wheatstraw the devil's son in law
Who do you hate the most on this board-
me
what is that smell-
sorry about that my left sock hasn't been washed in awhile.

Everyone copied off of that stop making fun of Wiffles from someone. Let us make fun of Wiffles.

You can shut up anytime you want, OK? >:

Name - Alan
Age - Seventeen
Job - Student (Scheidegger Training Institute)
Where You At? - United Kingdom
Favourite Movie - Blade Runner

I found this place through Brawl Hall :)

Name- Stacy
Age- 23
job- Customer Care Specialist III (yes this makes me important!)
where you at?- somewhere in FL
why did you start posting- I don't know
how long have you been on the board- couple of weeks
hobbies- drinking, kickboxing, swimming, music... etc
fav. music/band- I have an appreciation for all music as long as it's good.
fav. book- I don't read that much
fav. movie- Office Space, Dirty Dancing, Friday..
Who do you hate the most on this board- noone yet
what is that smell- oops

hmmmm....
Name: Ean
Age: 19
J0bz0rz: Slacker.
Where am I?: Bremerton, WA
favorite band/music: Danzig/metal
favorite book: dont have one, but Im reading Lurker at the Threshold by HP lovecraft, and its chaulk full of nifty...
Favorite movie: either Army of Darkness or Redneck Zombies
Who do I hate the most on this board: Im too new to have a hated foe yet, but patience has its rewards :posh

Very well...

Name- Leopold Goenitz
Age- 20 (Maybe)
job- If I told you, I'd have to kill you.
where you at?- I've got two turntables and a microphone (Wait... that's "Where it's at"...)
why did you start posting- To show the ignorant masses the power of my secret organization.
how long have you been on the board- 3 minutes... and please, any Jamal/Rosey/Rico jokes will get you killed.
hobbies- Writing some of the most absurd hentai on the planet under the pseudonym "Geopold Loenitz" Damn, I'm slick...
fav. music/band- Xzibit
fav. book- "Napalm and Silly Putty" by George Carlin... a book, I have a feeling you'd love, RoG.
fav. movie- Yotoden: Wrath of the Ninja
Who do you hate the most on this board- The ignorant masses
what is that smell- Shit, I left the oven on... hope I didn't char Fido to badly... I swear, officer, I was just trying to dry him off... those carrots and peas around him on the dish are... um... hey, look, a doughnut! (dashes off)

yeah... I remember you... Iori, Ryo and Terry kicked your ass on my computer many a time before... heh heh

You dare besmirch the name of the great Leopold Goenitz? I shall have to use my strongest, most powerful attack... one that leaves all quaking with fear in it's wake...

*clears his throat*

YO' MAMA!

Sorry I had to do that...

And it was supposed to be Kyo, Iori, and Chizuru. But you could only play her on the CD Release. DAMNED CONTEMPIBLE SNK BASTARDS!

Welcome, faggots.

Classy name, goenitz.

Me
 

about time I did this on the cool new board.

Name- Sir Tuffy, Winnipeg Ninja
Age- 21
Job (thats funny)- student
where you at?- my parents basement.
why did you start posting- I though Chojin was a hot girl that was in to furries. Which would be my dream. But it wasn't. :(
how long have you been on the board-
since october 2002
hobbies-
not moving and sleeping.
fav. music/band-
Eminem, Notorious B.I.G. and Nas. Being rich, white, and canadian, I feel I can really relate to the backgrounds of these artists.
fav. book-
"how to be successful with women". I forgot who wrote it and only read the first couple chapters.
fav. movie-
Trailer Park Boys
Who do you hate the most on this board-
I hate everyone almost equally.
what is that smell-
probably Jamesman, the big sweaty immigrant.
I've always regretted- That Mock ignores me. Like I would if I were him.

What is that smell- My sheets

It smells more like a failed joke

Name- tenno/wavesofdeadblack/jeremy zerfoss
Age- 24
job- ASSHAT
where you at?- Vegas, you know the sinning one? Not new mexico's
why did you start posting- somone on the eternalbeats.net board complained about the antirave site, then i fel in love with glowbelly

how long have you been on the board- 3 years ago, san!

hobbies- anime/ music/books
fav. music/band- aphex twin / NIN / MSI
fav. book- Stephen Kings
fav. movie- Friday
Who do you hate the most on this board- the fact that i cant seem to find time to post=(

what is that smell- my balls on your chin, i'd wash but you said you liked it dirty

Name- Seth
Age- 18
Job (thats funny)- off-time student, not yet with job
where you at?- home, see side bar
why did you start posting- Nothing else to do 'round here.
how long have you been on the board- August 2000, as Winston Smith
hobbies- history and learning shit
fav. music/band- STP, Rammstein, Violent Femmes, NIN
fav. book- Breakfast of Champions, by Vonnegut
fav. movie- The Hudsucker Proxy
Who do you hate the most on this board- Sethomas, because I'm goth like that.
what is that smell- bacon
I've always regretted- should have realized what a force Google would become in the future.

:(

There are maybe 4 people here who know what the ASMB even means, let alone have been there.

and Goenitz, in the span of two posts, has already made me hate him and his entire family. He has fallen into skulhedface status.

And Wiffles is too good to be real. Has to be a joke.

Name- Padraic
Age- 18
job- mindless, droning tedium
where you at?- Cape Cod
why did you start posting- A raver friend of mine said, "This bitch 'glowbelly' is making fun of me on this anti-rave site, and you're good with big words. Can you help?"
how long have you been on the board- Er. March-Agust 2001, then only a few weeks recently.
hobbies- Halo, taking apart and rebuilding my computer, painting, leaving reality
fav. music/band- i stopped listening to music a while ago. i don't know why.
fav. book- The Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy (A six book "Trilogy", by Douglas Adams)
fav. movie- Whichever one I happen to be watching at the moment... I love movies.
Who do you hate the most on this board- Oh... I don't know where to begin.
what is that smell- Probably my roommate.

I know what it means. :(

You do not >: :rolleyes

BEST MESSAGE BOARD EVAR. :(

Get to know me!
 

Hi all. I just joined today and this is my first post and I need to pee.
Name: Ben aka CP Bacon
Age:30
Ga.
I'm here cos I'm bored plus I did a search for Goth Kids suck and I ended up here so it can't be that bad.
Hobbies are reading (yes I'm a nerd) Indy comics and movies, writing, etc.
Fav. books include: Junky by Burroughs, Catcher in the Rye by Salinger and several Stephen King books.
I just started so I don't hate anything about here (yet).
And that smell is uh, well it's I think it's uh me.

So anyhoo there my quiz answers. I look forward to talking to (most) of you. Send me a message and maybe come by my site sometime. Later.

Name- Erica
Age-
job- student
where you at?-usa
why did you start posting-got bored, and needed another message board to come to
how long have you been on the board-mm like a week
hobbies- painting, drawing, photography, listenign to music
fav. music/band- less than jake
fav. book- someone was watching, or the girl who loved tom gorden
fav. movie-now and then
Who do you hate the most on this board-nothing
what is that smell-eggs

You are 60 years old, aren't you?

OMG who do you post as? :( Or were you banned :( Do you even post :(

I don't post. :(

I go there as a guest all the time though. :(

Kon, how dare you disc the 80's Zelda cartoon. You have a black heart.

I find that avatar rather LOL. :(

You should start posting Esuohlim >: :(

No one else does :(

And that's not the 80's Zelda cartoon, it's the CD-i Zelda game. >:

I would, but EZBoard was designed to piss me off. >:

That is why I never registered at the old I-Mockery Board. :(

:(

Here is me!

Name- Joe
Age- 18
job- Carpet installer (uhhh, i know)
where you at?- BC Canada
why did you start posting- Cause this board is interesting
how long have you been on the board- Ive been on the board for the past few days, but i have been here before under different Aliases
hobbies- Star Trek Fan fic, Playing instruments
fav. music/band- Too many to count
fav. book- The Shinara series
fav. movie- Any and all....probably Braveheart though
Who do you hate the most on this board- No one yet, but im sure someone will hate me soon. and i will hate them too :/
what is that smell- i dunno, you tell me!

I don't want to get to know you. :(

600TH POST

I'll say something pointless and stupid for no reason just like Cap'n Crunch to get to my...

664TH POST

>:

WOW NOTHING LIKE A GOOD TREND!

553RD POST

None of you would have said anything if I put 600th post on it.

I like how the same three people always seem to ruin every thread.

Actually, I don't. Fucking die.

Name- Jenn

Age- 20

job- Childcare.. Bleh.

where you at?- Bremerton, WA

why did you start posting- My Boyfriend UnDeath put a chainsaw to my head and told me to.

how long have you been on the board- A week maybe.

hobbies- Writing, listening to music, reading, not going to work, playing with UnDeath crap-ass weapons, etc...

fav. music/band- Tori Amos, GWAR, KMFDM, Front Line Assembly, Depeche Mode, Bauhaus, Dimmu Borgir, and lots of other shite-arse music.

fav. book- "1984" by George Orwell

fav. movie- "Redneck Zombies"

Who do you hate the most on this board- I couldn't tell you.

what is that smell- Oops......

You add to the mixture. :)

Rongi makes it the mostest fun.

>: Mostest isn't a work >:

If your just going to make up words, then your gonna put Webster out of business.

Noah Webster was a lunatic.

Honestly, who sits down one day and decides, "I'm going to make a list of every word in the English language and make definitions for them."

Noah Webster, that's who. >:

Im glad he did, i needed to look up alabastar once

Thank you Webster :)

No, really, STOP. Quit posting after one another. What are you, impulsed to counterpost? Shut up for once, and quit posting thirty five times in every goddamn topic, some people would like to be able to read threads without having to wade through pictures of Reptile, Catloaf and Dewey at every turn. Cut it the fuck out and save yourselves some typing energy.

Someone needed to say it.

I'll see to it ninja, I apologize.

danke schon, Ninjavenom! :bow

Name- Justine
Age- 17
job- Drug Consumer
where you at?- im not quite sure...shit....
why did you start posting- peer pressure.
how long have you been on the board- oh uhm....yesturday...the say before?
hobbies- drugs...
fav. music/band- nirvana...tool....pink floyd...
fav. book- *shrug* high times?
fav. movie- requiem for a dream
Who do you hate the most on this board- your all so mean IT MAKES ME WANT TO KILL AGAIN

Name- Cortney
Age- 19
job- none at the moment, some crappy summer job when I get out of school for the summer
where you at?- Roanoke/Radford Virginia
why did you start posting- I felt like it....was getting a little bored with my local edm board...
how long have you been on the board- umm, about 2 days now
hobbies- reading, chillin with friends, surfin the internet, Ukrainian egg painting, knitting, livejournal....I don't know...just a bunch of random shite
fav. music/band- I don't have any favorites...I like everything, but I've gotten into EDM quite a bit since September
fav. books- The Elric Saga, Shadow Moon/Dawn/Star, The Vampire Chronicles
fav. movie-again, no favorites...
Who do you hate the most on this board- no one, haven't been here long enough to hate anyone
what is that smell- pickles

Name- Alex
Age- 21
job- Student
where you at?- Brisbane Australia
why did you start posting- For the hell of it
how long have you been on the board- about 10 minutes ago
hobbies- gaming listening to music bbq'ing
fav. music/band- icp twiztid emil bulls korn linkin park etc...
fav. book- the only book i have ever read is charlie and the chocolate factory and that is only cause i was forced too..
fav. movie- Anything martial arts or comedy...
Who do you hate the most on this board- no one yet...
:confused

(Walks in, takes the podium, and starts introducing himself)

Name- NES Boy
Age- 16
job- none
where you at?- Nowhere in particular.
why did you start posting- Just to chat.
how long have you been on the board- Not long.
hobbies- Surfing the internet.
fav. music/band- None in particular.
fav. book- Spy VS. Spy, the Complete Casebook
fav. movie- Bedknobs and Broomsticks
what is that smell- 'Scuse me! I had Gas!

I find it worthy of Mockery that banshee would use Apocalypse Culture as her avatar and not list it as one of her favorite books. It's too small to see what it is, unless you know what you're looking at.
Anywho :fart

umm....thank you?

I don't think a thank you was in order. :lol

that's why the question mark is there...

Name- Courtney
Age- 15
job- student/musician/person who files things
where you at?- New Jersey
why did you start posting- I love I-Mockery. I'm not sure if I'll keep posting, though.
how long have you been on the board- this is my first post.
hobbies- guitar, ocarina, composition, trying to be funny, impressingroom.com, video games
fav. music/band- www.livejournal.com/users/somewittyquote if you really want to know check my user information.
fav. book- possibly the sevenwaters trilogy
fav. movie- Boondock Saints, Suspiria, Another Heaven (japanese horror is hilarious), many many others
Who do you hate the most on this board- I don't know yet... I might if I had read this whole thread, but I'm lazy as hell.
what is that smell- cookies

I can tell you're going to be a real winner. >:

i hate that expression. it twists my insides into a knot. couldn't you have said something more insulting? that expression just makes you seem lazy.

just ignore him.....hes our resident asshole. Feel free to just ignore him

Shut up, Johannas.

name: joe

job: student, semi-pro candelpin bowler

Where you at: Burbs o' Boston

why did I start postiing: lets call it a drunken impulse inspired by midget porn

How long have I been here: Initial post

Hobbies: The internet, Bowling, Dance Dance, Gaming, ceramics, critiquing movies

Favorite Band: Blind Guardian

Favorite Book: anything by douglas adams, anything by william gibson

Favortie Movie: Anything By tarantino, Boondock Saints, 12 monkeys

What Do I hate most about this board: that as I type this I have 0 posts

Whats that smell? Me reeking of B,O. from playing 3 hours of Dance Dance Revolution

Name- Grandpa Jones
Age- 82
job- Retired
where you at?- A retirement home
why did you start posting- I can't remember. :(
how long have you been on the board- Ok
hobbies- Sleeping, hitting on nurses, sleeping.
fav. music/band- Johnny Cash.
fav. book- Harry Potter
fav. movie- Madeline
Who do you hate the most on this board- I can't remember anybodys name. :(
what is that smell- I probably just shit myself.

Shove it, Johannes. You smell like rancid cunt yourself.

wheres all this bent up anger coming from? Were you beaten as a child??

DTH
JOHANNAS

PENT up.

Name - Aphrael
Age - 18
Job - student, casual IT helper
Where you at? - brisbane...queensland...australia...
Why did you start posting - because i felt like it?
How long have you been on the board - about a day...
Hobbies - ...as in my profile, i can't be fucked writing all this shit out...ASK!
Fav. music/band - Tool...or ICP...
Fav. book/s - The entire collection of David Eddings books
Fav. movie - Tank Girl
Who do you hate the most on this board - MrAdventure...i'm not going to shut up no matter HOW many times you keep telling me to...
What is that smell - ...amusing...there are now scents on the net...how come i wasn't informed?!?!

CONGRATS MR ADVENTURE!

THIS CALLS FOR A RAP BATTLE, I SWHOULD START ONE IN MOCK WARS (AND I MIGHT)

Name - for your reference... Lassoam

age - 18

job - student as of this summer at VCU, and i just quit my
job so i'm currently unemployed

Where you at? - Williamsburg, Virginia or Richmond, VA
depending on when youre talking to me.

Why did you start Posting - kind of did on the old one,
but i hate ez board

How long have you been on the board - under 2 weeks

Hobbies? - mandolin, guitar, metal, i collect cds
(i.e. dont burn)

Fav. music/band - i like too many bands for different reasons
so.. bm, dm, powermetal, viking metal, etc

Fav. Books - either the fountainhead or the dune series

fav. movie - my blue heaven

hate the most on this bb - metal sections got a watered
down vibe to it, no offense.

whats that smell? - i was born without a sense of smell

Name: Wolf Audet

Age: 17

Job: Student in high school/Grand Master of under water basket weaving

Where: Madison, CT

Why did you start posting: to tell some jesus freak to shut up

How long have you been posting: i used to post a little on the old board but mainly just looked ( about a year before the board switched over)

Hobbies: diveing, metal, and drugs

Fav. band: At The Gates

Fav. Book: Everything You Know Is Wrong

Fav. Movie: Donnie Darko, the matrix, Princess Moninoke (spelling?)

Hate the most on the board: their used to be a kid with BlackFlag somthing as his name he had a picture of some godzilla monster as an icon. he was a dumbass.

smell: burning flesh

Name- Dr. Andreas Raggamoffin, phd.
Age- 17
job- my last one fired me, simply because of "stalking my co-workers" and having a "poor personal appearance", etc.
where you at?- THE NINTH LAYER OF SWAMPY GEORGIAN INFERNO
why did you start posting- draw attention to myself
how long have you been on the board- few minutes
hobbies- i get so lonely sometimes. it's so very cold in here.
fav. music/band- System of a Cold Tool
fav. book- "The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath"
fav. movie- lord of the rings movies
Who do you hate the most on this board- it's too hostile.
what is that smell- sog.

:troutslap

Name: Brandon, obviously.
Age: 20, obviously.
Job: A student (i.e. unemployed)
Where you at: I'm somewhere...I don't know where, but I think I need you to come get me. I'm wearing your favorite leather jacket and there's mud all over it. Sorry.
Why did you start posting: Someone has a gun to my head.
How long have you been on the board: Lurking forever, started posting today.
Hobbies: You're better off not knowing about them.
Fav Music/Band: If something becomes too popular I usually hate it right away.
Fav Books: The Great Gatsby
Fav Movie: Psycho
Who do you hate the most on this board: Vince, Vince, Vince.
What is that smell: HOT SECKS

Name: Clayton
Age: 14
job: Do you really think a 14 year old retard could even work at McDonalds? Yes
where are you at: Ohio
why did you start posting: I don't know but I regret it.
how long have you been on the board: A couple of weeks now.
hobbies: video games and collecting old stuff.
favorite band: Linkin Park and Duran Duran
favorite book: Charlie And the Chocolate factory
who do you hate most on this board: nobody yet
what is taht smell: Do you want to know the horrible truth?

Name: Names are for losers. :rolleyes
Age: 97 :rolleyes
Job: Garbage man :rolleyes
Location: In a chair, looking at my computer :rolleyes
Why did you start posting: To have fun :rolleyes
How long have you been on the board: All my life :rolleyes
Hobbies: video games and collecting old stuff. :rolleyes
favorite band: Linkin Park and Duran Duran :rolleyes
favorite book: Charlie And the Chocolate factory :rolleyes
who do you hate most on this board: Everyone here is so cool. :rolleyes
What's that smell?: Probably your face. :rolleyes

Name: Phil
Age: 20
Job: none
Location: Western Kentucky, unfortunately
Why did you start posting: i-mockery's probably my fav site on the net now, plus it seems all the message boards i've ever posted at were all about video games, so I want to try something different
How long have you been on the board: heh, since last night
Hobbies: MUDding, video games, playing guitar, music
favorite band: Nirvana, CKY, Stone Sour, The Misfits, Fear Factory
favorite book: I havne't read a book front to cover in years :) I used to read the bobsey twins though when I was a kid, hehe :P
who do you hate most on this board: All the frickin' newb....err...wait
What's that smell?: The semen encrusted sock underneath my desk

I haven't been on here in forever... And I lost my old account info...


Either way... Ya'll don't want none of this!
[center:528d54bfe8][/center:528d54bfe8]

Nuff Said.


-DB
http://www.globalapathy.com

BANG.



I cant afford a pickle hat, or bullets. :(

hAEhAHEhAEHhaEHahehea

NO JIN! DON'T DO IT :tear

Oh wait...:)

gg

My ancestors are from Quebec. >:

I thank them for allowing anyone into their casinos, regardless of age.