For our last horror moment of the season, I thought I'd take things down a notch. All month long, you've been seeing zombies dish it out as well as they take it, but has anyone really taken the time to consider their feelings? Sure, some of the cynics out there might argue that "brains!" isn't technically a feeling, but that's not what I'm talking about. Case in point, take a look at this scene from the cult classic, Re-Animator:

Good morning, honey.

Late in the movie, the reanimated Dr. Hill kidnaps the lovely grad student, Megan, for a little late night study session. Indeed, it seems the hunt for brains is not the only motivational force behind the zombie. Once she regains consciousness, Megan is slightly put off by the chest massage and severed head, and she manages to free one of her hands to take a swipe at the doctor.


Of course, that head was just the show model. The one sitting in the tray next to her is the real deal. The sight of Megan slapping the plastic medical model head off his shoulders is quite amusing to Dr. Hill, and he laughs evilly as Megan shrieks and tugs at her bonds. His pan doesn't provide much of a view for him, and so Dr. Hill grabs his head and hoists it into position for a closer look.

My, what big eyes you have..

He brings himself close to the terrified Megan and gurgles out a profession of love for the young coed. I don't know if he was expecting this to really woo her, but it's clear that she isn't particularly interested in becoming the lucky girl who holds a bucket under his dripping neck stump. Still, the undead are known for their tenacity, and the good doctor decides to up the ante a bit with some tongue action.

Hey, get a room, you two!

That certainly isn't going over well with Megan. Then again, maybe she's just shy. After all, Dr. Hill is doing all this in full view of one of the other reanimated corpses, and he is looking on with no small amount of interest. He tries to manage a smile, but the best he can do is a sort of zombie sneer. It's just as well, though, for Dr. Hill is about to move his operation south of the border, if you know what I mean:

The less said about his bedside manner, the better.

Things have gone from bad to worse for poor Megan. Or maybe you think things have gotten better, because you're a perv. Anyway, before Dr. Hill can check his own tongue for rigor mortis, Dr. West shows up, eager to put a stop to the decapitee who stole his life's work (now that's irony).

You're getting blood on my grad student.
"I must say, Dr. Hill, I'm very disappointed in you."

Let me just say if there's one surefire way to get yourself killed, it's to cuckold a zombie.

back to previous page


a horrible night indeed! :o