You decide to cry like
a big, fat, pizza-making baby and man oh man... you sure are convincing!
In fact, your performance is so dead-on that it not only fools your
closest friends, it actually fools YOU as well. You become so completely
engulfed in this newfound big, fat, pizza-making baby persona that it
physically manifests itself by contorting your body into a slice of
pizza with a baby for a head.
Sure, it doesn't make
much sense out in the "real world", but this is our fucking story and
our rules, so you're stuck with whatever we tell you. Stuck as a big,
fat, pizza-making baby, in this case. That is, of course, until some
women returning from their Sunday game of "bridge" notice you sitting
there, crying in all of your pizza gooeyness. Between your absurdly cute
looks and their hungry appetites, you're torn apart in mere seconds.
It's too bad that you never had a chance to explore your acting skills
any further. Who knows, maybe you could've become the next Marlon Brando.
Maybe then you could've actually stepped away from the computer for a
few measly minutes of your sad, big, fat pizza-making baby life.
