I admit that I had
not heard of this game up ‘til a couple weeks ago. Of course, given
the title, how could we not include it in our little list? That’s
right, we couldn’t. We were absolutely helpless against the will of
Toilet Kids. Anyway, as far as I can tell, Toilet Kids is the story
of a young lad who wakes up in the middle of the night, in need of a
bathroom break, and is sucked into his toilet to battle the
mysterious, dangerous forces within. Aren’t foreign cultures
wonderful?
Ah yes, a truly
frightening enemy indeed. Woe unto those who wrong the giant urinal
and his toilet bodyguards. And not a urinal cake in sight.
But I could go on and on about what other kinds of weird crap is
going on in this game. Giant, neatly-coiled piles of shit,
crap-throwing frogs, golden poo, etc. But there’s something else
that I think you all should see.
There’s the unnamed hero of our bathroom bonanza.
Aw, look at him. He’s sleepy! What a cute little kid.
Hey,
wait a minute. What the hell are you doing? Hold on just one…
Aaaaauuuuuggghh! Oh for the love of God and all that is holy!
Now I know what
you’re thinking: this is the worst cutscene I’ve ever seen. Well
you’re right. There’s really nothing more to say beyond that. Just
rest assured that someone is going to hell, and for once, it isn’t
me.
