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Scotland and The Snorks: ALLIES!
Now I know whatchar thinkin! "Ooo noo, the Snorks! They really scare me!!!" with all of your snide sarcasm 'n such. But before you go about your ways while laughing the whole thing off, let me inform you about why you SHOULD fear these strange creatures! For those of you who don't know what the Snorks are, I can explain that very easily. The Snorks was a fun, loving, and sickeningly huggable group of cartoon characters that were aired on television during the 1980's. They lived under the ocean and maintained the peace in the sea world. Nice enough eh? Well their nice days are OVER! Now the Snorks have become the most violent and ruthless species that this planet has ever seen! Why? Well, besides being pissed off by some local sharks (and possibly our friend 'Nessie' too), The Snorks were forced to leave their ocean habitat due to the unbearable amounts of pollution. These toxins had strange effects on them and eventually turned them from the huggable little bastards that they used to be, into the nastiest goremongers this side 'o Scotland! And what's worse, they have a score to settle with the world!
Luckily, they have decided to team up with Scotland since they share a common purpose: KILLING EVERYBODY! Now, it must have
taken quite some time for the Snorks to become so violent. But remember, they were on
t.v. over 10 years ago and have had
much time to train. The snorkel-like extensions on their heads have also evolved. Since they don't use them to breathe with
underwater anymore, they have evolved into full-powered semi-automatic weapons! That's right, instead of bubbles coming out of the
snorkels, they have BULLETS! And what's worse is they are trained to kill by The Scottish! Aye, we've given them tons of
artillery to play with. Grenades, Knives, Explosives....we've even taught them some classic Scottish Biting Techniques!
So as you can see, the chances of the rest of the Non-Scottish human race doesn't stand a chance against Scotland now!
At one point they might of had a chance to fend off a Scot or two for a wee minute or so. But now, aye,
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Hello Lads! I'm here today to inform you about the latest developments in Scotland's Conquest Of The World!
Let me tell ya, the entire human race as we know it has much to worry about! For the sons of Scotland have gained an ally of
such violent and destructive capabilities, that I'd be a wee bit surprised to see a single NON-SCOTTISH person remaining
after The Great Tribulations.
