|
||||||
| FAQ | Members List | Calendar | Today's Posts | Search |
Topic Review (Newest First)
|
| Sep 23rd, 2003 05:08 AM | ||
| Dole | "don't have sex afterwards" -I have heard several people say that grief is a natural; reaction to, and great way to deal with grief. Not that this will help James much. | |
| Sep 22nd, 2003 07:37 PM | ||
| Rongi |
My grandpa's death never really hit me. He died a few months after 911 so I was a little shaken, but for some reason I keep thinking he's just with his family in Kentucky. Same goes with my mom's best friend, who was like an aunt to me. I just keep thinking she's still in Florida. My uncle actually killed my grandpa. Not literally, but my grandpa was so dissapointed in him and his drug addiction that he couldn't take it anymore. My grandma has a lump on her breast, but she says it'll go away. She wont go to the hospital. Typical italian grandma |
|
| Sep 22nd, 2003 06:05 PM | ||
| Helm | Grief is one of the most egotistical reactions man is capable of. So be prepared to be around losts of people that will be projecting this to a sickening degree. Be prepared that you will, too. Deny anyone the chance of discussing 'what a great guy/gal' they where and attend the bare minimum of assorted get togethers allowed by your lifestyle/religion/morality. Skip the funeral, if possible. If you don't, at least don't look in the coffin, if it's open and don't have sex afterwards. That's all. | |
| Sep 22nd, 2003 03:17 PM | ||
| mburbank | Don't bother preparing because you can't. Your reaction will be your reaction. Whatever it is, try to relax into it, not fight it or deny it. The only way to honor the dead is to allow yourself to feel whatever you feel, odd, cold, bizarre, mean, drunk, affirmed, alive, whatever. | |
| Sep 21st, 2003 03:30 AM | ||
| Jixby Phillips | I kept a diary about my friend Ben after he killed himself. It was pretty glib and kind of mean. I guess that's how I dealt with it. | |
| Sep 21st, 2003 02:51 AM | ||
| Professor Cool | One of my best friends died when i was 14, and what i did is take all my grief into drawing. After a awhile it started to make things seemed somewhat ok again. I say, put your sorrow into some kind of medium. It helped for me. | |
| Sep 21st, 2003 12:44 AM | ||
| James |
Quote:
As to the rest of you who have basic human comprehension and a sense of logic (at the very least), thank you for your input. I guess I'm just worrying too much about this, and thinking that being surrounded by it all will be too much to handle. But I guess I'll just have to feel things out for when the time comes. And who knows? Maybe I will have a chance to kind of get away from it every now and then. |
|
| Sep 20th, 2003 11:21 PM | ||
| Anonymous | who the hell uses yahoo messenger? | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 11:21 PM | ||
| Rev. Danno |
Start drinking alot, alienate everyone you know... Walk around, & sulk ALL THE TIME!!! Never act happy, and when you do... be a wierd happy, a scary happy. Well that's what I'm told I did when my mom died. I don't really remember, I was really drunk for 3 years... |
|
| Sep 20th, 2003 11:21 PM | ||
| glowbelly |
james, hit me up on aim the next time you get a chance. i've been through the death thing a couple of times over and might be able to talk you through some stuff. i just don't wanna do it here. |
|
| Sep 20th, 2003 11:15 PM | ||
| Anonymous | Your nick should have been 'irony' | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 11:13 PM | ||
| payne | ya no offense i fell sorry 4 ya but why in the world would u tell this to millions of people here on imockery do u want attention go get it some whre else | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 08:03 PM | ||
| AChimp |
When my grandpa died, I joked about how he would get to ride on the Meat Wagon.
|
|
| Sep 20th, 2003 05:12 PM | ||
| slavemason |
If your grandmother is still there mentally, maybe you should just tell her how much you love her. There's no sense in trying to practice lines or anything like that. Everyone here seems to have the only good advice, just be there. Without her, you wouldn't be here. Remember that. When my Dad died, I watched the pain go away. He had an aortal aneurysm. He went down pretty fast, just like he wanted. It was just too soon. He was only 62. He had applied for his retirement benefits the same day. Huggins luck, he always told me. It's time to think beyond yourself... and I'm not trying to start shit either. Good Luck |
|
| Sep 20th, 2003 04:42 PM | ||
| pickleninja | Some people cremate cats or give them a proper burial when they die. | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 03:46 PM | ||
| Randomnimity |
My grandpa died just a couple weeks ago. I found the best thing to do was simply stay quiet and to myself, and people who needed the comfort came to me while other people respected my silence and left me alone. This was also helped because I gave a eulogy at his memorial mass (he was cremated, there was no funeral.) If you think people will see you as insensitive, and are a decent speaker, just ask if you can give a speech to your family about how much he meant to you. No one questioned me on whether or not I cared after they saw my presentation; rather they saw me as strong because I could keep a straight face as I spoke words of good times past. Generally, it seems, people will be too busy grieving to themselves or about your lost one to really worry how you act. I'm sorry to here about the death, and I hope everything turns out alright. |
|
| Sep 20th, 2003 02:23 PM | ||
| Dole | I think its a case of just being there for the people who are grieving..there is nothing you can practically do to help your family, just show your support. Its tough, but get used to it because its a situation all of us will experience again and again...thats one of the only certainties in life. | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 01:37 PM | ||
| FartinMowler | I alway's try to find a cousin or someone my age to hang out with and talk. Older generation like to see you there as a form of respect. A simple handshake and giving condolences is all most look for. | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 01:20 PM | ||
| Perndog | I don't know what to say about just being around a group of sad people; I try to avoid that kind of scene entirely. Since it seems like you don't really have a choice, I'd just say pick a spot in the back of the crowd and daydream until it's over. | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 01:15 PM | ||
| Spooky |
My best friend died when I was 16, and when I was 18, My grandfather died. I couldn't take it, I was close to him, so I did something I never thought I would do. I hopped on a train, and dissappeared to Chicago for a week. The point of me telling this story? Everyone has their own way of coping, so don't worry about everyone else. |
|
| Sep 20th, 2003 12:59 PM | ||
| Alphonse | I've never lost anyone close to me. I think my grandpa on my mothers side is getting there though. :/ | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 12:52 PM | ||
| Spectre X | cry. Whenever you feel like you're gonna cry, cry. worked for me when my granddad died. | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 12:36 PM | ||
| ScruU2wice | I really hardly ever feel sad when people die, and people call me a monster for it. I devoutly believe in an after-life and i usually just feel sad for the people who have to go on without their loved one. Whenever i go to a funeral i just stay put and not talk alot. The most conversation i have is offering my condolences to the family and try not to say anything that will make them any more sad then they already are. If your not the grieving type, don't say alot cuz something might come out that might offend other people... | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 12:03 PM | ||
| FreakinStrange | Yeah dealing with death is really hard around three years ago my grandma on my dads side and my cousin on my moms side died one from a heart condition the other from being shot in the head. I had never been to a funeral before but the next thing I knew I was going to two funerals that were only seperated by a day. | |
| Sep 20th, 2003 11:56 AM | ||
| James |
I don't even know if I can give an ear or a shoulder. But what about dealing with being around it all? Not necessarily being there for others and whatnot, but just keeping my own sanity being surrounded by grieving, and not being able to get away from it. |
|
| This thread has more than 25 replies. Click here to review the whole thread. | ||
