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Sep 13th, 2005 10:44 PM
Skulhedface From Louisiana:

Quote:
It is illegal to shoot lasers at police officers.
Damn! Time to discard the death ray.

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One could land in jail for up to a year for making a false promise.
It's a wonder politicians don't fill our jail cells, yuk yuk yuk

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Prisoners who hurt themselves could serve an additional two years in jail.
Not only do you have to worry about dropping the soap, but you have to make sure not to slip on it, either.

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Biting someone with your natural teeth is "simple assault," while biting someone with your false teeth is "aggravated assault."
What about gumming someone?

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All garbage must be cooked before it can be fed to any hogs.
Because it's important to have standards.

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Trying to save the rain forest? Don’t try in New Orleans, because it is illegal to plant a tree in any city park.
So don't even try to play in a New Orleans rainforest.

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Don’t try to do any kind of fancy bicycle riding in this town. All riders must keep at least one hand on the wheel at all times.
So even if New Orleans wasn't a lake, you won't be seeing the X-Games there.

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No person may predict another's future.
Good thing Miss Cleo was fake. Otherwise she'd have STILL been in trouble.

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It is illegal to have sex with a cow.
Yeah. Wait until after it's in burger form.

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It is illegal to be an alcoholic.
Good thing this isn't enforced, otherwise Goodbye Mardi Gras.
Sep 13th, 2005 04:46 PM
KevinTheOmnivore My buddy e-mailed Ada, Oklahoma, and they said the NY Jets law was bogus.
Sep 13th, 2005 04:43 PM
Marc Summers A few from my state of CA:
Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses.
It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.
Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.

And in Los Angeles:
It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent. (We enjoy women's rights)
It is illegal to cry on the witness stand. (Damn straight ya gotta be a MAN)
Sep 13th, 2005 12:34 PM
sadie Virginia: "Not only is it illegal to have sex with the lights on, one may not have sex in any position other than missionary."
Sep 13th, 2005 09:02 AM
KevinTheOmnivore
Quote:
Originally Posted by El Blanco
Quote:
It is against the law to throw a ball at someone's head for fun.
Hear that, Roger Clemens? And splintered bats aren't looked too kindly upon, either.
Ah, but he was paid quite well that day for hitting Mr. Piazza. So see, it wasn't for fun, it was business.
Sep 13th, 2005 08:58 AM
Cosmo Electrolux
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Oysterhead
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Idiots may not vote.
- New Mexico
if that law were enforced nationwide, the republican party would be no more.....
Sep 13th, 2005 08:43 AM
KevinTheOmnivore
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rongi
something tells me that law is either extremely old and not even excersised anymore or some goon's idea of a joke by posting it on the internet.
Well, yeah, totally. That's sort of the reason this website exists, because most states have such silly old laws on the books, which are generally never enforced.

This can lead to trouble though, whereas the average citizen might not know that there's some goofy law in Boston about spitting, a cop may, and might use it to target people they're after (happens a lot in DC regarding bicycles....don't ask).
Sep 12th, 2005 09:15 PM
Mr. Oysterhead
Quote:
Idiots may not vote.
- New Mexico
Sep 12th, 2005 08:27 PM
ArrowX A woman can not be on top in sexual activities. - Massachusetts

If you are released from prison, it is required that you are given a handgun with bullets and a horse, so you can ride out of town. - Alberta
We Rule :D
Sep 12th, 2005 07:27 PM
Jeanette X I once saw an ad for a website, I think it was for Lawyers.com, that said it was illegal to enter Wisconsin (or was it Wyoming?) with a chicken on your head.

The flirting law probably dates back to the Puritan era.
Sep 12th, 2005 07:14 PM
El Blanco
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A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking "at a woman in that way." A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a "pair of horse-blinders" wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll.
Classic

Quote:
It is against the law to throw a ball at someone's head for fun.
Hear that, Roger Clemens? And splintered bats aren't looked too kindly upon, either.

Quote:
The penalty for jumping off a building is death.
We'll just refer to this as the Law of gravity.
Sep 12th, 2005 07:13 PM
Rongi something tells me that law is either extremely old and not even excersised anymore or some goon's idea of a joke by posting it on the internet.
Sep 12th, 2005 07:10 PM
El Blanco
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rongi
"While riding in an elevator, one must talk to no one, and fold his hands while looking toward the door. " For New York
Don't suppose that is under penalty of summary execution?
Sep 12th, 2005 07:02 PM
KevinTheOmnivore You should call your town hall and check the veracity of that law.
Sep 12th, 2005 06:58 PM
Immortal Goat "You may not run out of gas" Youngstown, Ohio

I LOVE MY FUCKING HOMETOWN!

"It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs. " West Virginia. Duh.
Sep 12th, 2005 06:40 PM
KevinTheOmnivore "It is illegal to sell ice cream after 6pm, unless the customer has a note from his doctor."
-- Newark, NJ

"You cannot "worry a squirrel." "
-- La Crosse, WI
Sep 12th, 2005 06:38 PM
Bobo Adobo "One-armed piano players must perform for free."

- Iowa
Sep 12th, 2005 06:23 PM
KevinTheOmnivore There's supposedly a law in an Oklahoma town that says you can be thrown in jail for wearing NY Jets merchandise.

I agree with it.
Sep 12th, 2005 06:11 PM
Aneurysm I saw on a similar site that, in Indiana, Pi is legally 3.2, I told my Algebra teacher this and she got angry at me.
Sep 12th, 2005 05:01 PM
Rongi "While riding in an elevator, one must talk to no one, and fold his hands while looking toward the door. " For New York
Sep 12th, 2005 04:35 PM
KevinTheOmnivore
dumblaws.com
www.dumblaws.com

Funny stuff.

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