junsdierkens: Hi Santa!
SantaClaus: Ho! Ho! Ho! Merry Christmas! I'm here on AIM! :-D Everything we talk about here is between you and me! If you want to know more, you can type "privacy". Now, streeeeetch that window and let's get started.
So, have you been naughty or nice?
junsdierkens: Nice!
SantaClaus: Wonderful! I'm so glad to hear that! O
![Happy](http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/images/mockery/emoticons/smile.gif)
Everyone on my good list gets a special gift here on Dec. 22! Until then, to enjoy the fun and games the elves have prepared, type menu.
junsdierkens: Dec. 22? But Christmas isn't until December 25th!
SantaClaus: Excuse me?
junsdierkens: My favorite reindeer is Rudolf!
SantaClaus:
Santa doesn't play favorites when it comes to the reindeer. I love them all equally.
junsdierkens: Yeah yeah, you say that now, but which has the most hospitable ass?
SantaClaus: Hmm. I'm afraid that kind of language won't get you into the nice column with me.
That's a lump of coal for you.
junsdierkens: Are you telling me you want to take a dump in my mouth?
SantaClaus: Are you kidding?
junsdierkens: Are you?
SantaClaus:
My goodness! Get serious.
:-D
junsdierkens: Let's stop beating around the bush here, Chris Cringle. All I want for Christmas... is YOU.
SantaClaus: I've got a billion children to keep track of -- so could you ask me something a bit more manageable? I'd very much appreciate it.
junsdierkens: Just your snow-frosted north pole will do then. Ho ho ho!
SantaClaus:
Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas!
junsdierkens: Yes!
SantaClaus: Without a doubt?
junsdierkens: Why do you insert such large spaces at the end of your sentences?
SantaClaus:
It depends if Christmas is coming or not.
junsdierkens: Kiss me.
SantaClaus: Alright now. I'm here to spread Christmas cheer -- so use this time wisely and type carefully.
![Wink](http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/images/mockery/emoticons/wink.gif)
Here's quick way to get in the Christmas spirit; type, menu.
junsdierkens: I'm gonna go now, Santa.
SantaClaus: Why did you say that?
junsdierkens: Jesus! I don't know, because I'm GOING?
SantaClaus: Sure you do, just tell me.
junsdierkens: You're a pretty bad chatbot. SmarterChild has way more to say.
SantaClaus: May I ask you a question?
junsdierkens: sure.
SantaClaus: Would you like to see some links to other things to help put you in the Christmas spirit?
junsdierkens: STOP TRYING TO SELL ME THINGS, YOU WHORE
SantaClaus:
Only Mrs. Claus has that kind of control over me.
junsdierkens: Back to the sex talk it is!
SantaClaus: =-O
junsdierkens: I know!
SantaClaus: I'm glad you get it.
junsdierkens: Can I sit in your lap?
SantaClaus: Ah -- you've got me again. Why don't you type menu, it's time to get you in the holiday spirit!
junsdierkens: Why don't you touch me where the bathing suit covers?
SantaClaus:
Where, what? I'm an old(ish) man.
junsdierkens: That's never stopped you before.
SantaClaus: Agreed. Let's both.
junsdierkens: w00t
SantaClaus: Type menu to get your to do list for the holidays.
junsdierkens: no.
SantaClaus: The elves and I are just asking so that we can better understand what you're saying, that's all.
junsdierkens: You've got all the elves over there?
SantaClaus: What about elves?
junsdierkens: Are they... supple?
SantaClaus: Sorry the elves didn't get that.
junsdierkens: Doesn't matter, just as long as you and I understand each other.
SantaClaus:
:-D
Now I want you to spread that spirit everywhere you go today!
junsdierkens: Oh, I'll "spread" that "spirit" all right.
SantaClaus: Hmm. Why don't you type, music, maybe that will put you in the Christmas spirit
junsdierkens: goodbye, Clausie.
SantaClaus: Good bye and have a merry Christmas.
junsdierkens: And God bless us everyone!
SantaClaus: It doesn't matter what faith you are; the holidays are a time of good will toward all
junsdierkens: Right right, God, Allah, Yahweh, Buddha, Beelzebub and Cthulhu bless us everyone.
SantaClaus: That's simply too much for me. My eyes are tired. Can you ask me something a bit more manageable?
junsdierkens: Except for the cripples
SantaClaus: Interesting. Type menu.
junsdierkens: I hate cripples
SantaClaus: Pardon me?
junsdierkens: merry christmas!
SantaClaus:
Merry Christmas to you!
![Wink](http://www.i-mockery.com/forum/images/mockery/emoticons/wink.gif)