FORUM EVENT: "I-MOCKERY'S 2010 SECRET SANTA EVENT!"

[Protoclown]

Alright, it's time for me to post my I-Mockery Secret Santa 2010 Photo Jamboree! My Secret Santa this year was Dextire, who sent me a box of awesomeness. So awesome that a holy light poured out as soon as I opened the box. It actually melted one of my roommate's faces off like at the end of Raiders, but I sadly don't have a photo of that.



There was a note inside the box, but I'm not going to include a picture of that, because it's paper, which I think you have all seen before. But it was an amusing note where Dextire explained everything that was in the box. As he warned me it contained SPOILERS, I opened all of the individually wrapped goodies first.

Here is what I found within:



A mini Sega Genesis game system with like six games that I plug directly into my TV! I have never had a Genesis, so this will be nice to play around with.



A copy of Sonic Spinball! His note explained that if I don't have a Genesis, I should display it prominently within my home so that people know what good taste I have in video games. I shall do this, and when people ask me specific questions about the game, I will distract them and jump out the nearest window.



This hilarious Transformer, Ejector. He turns into a fucking toaster. Yep. (Thinks he's a cylon). I can't think of a more ludicrously stupid thing for a Transformer to be. And he's a Decepticon too, so I guess he uses his sinister powers to BURN YOUR TOAST. Awesome. I got a very good laugh when I saw this guy.



Some DVDs! Dark Night of the Scarecrow, Trap Door, and a Rutger Hauer double feature (Omega Doom and Blind Fury, and it's hilarious how both of those cover images blend together). None of which I have seen! Excellent!



A pair of "Little Animal" telephones. I don't know why they are called Little Animal since they are clearly a Dragon Ball Z knockoff. I have included a video of all the annoying noises it makes at the end of this post! I actually have another similar cheesy annoying phone robot called "Combatant Phone". I will have to put up a video of the two of them dueling annoying noises sometime.



Tons of tasty treats!!



Some Dinosaurs Attack! and Coca-Cola trading cards. I'm sure they will be quite amusing. The Coca-Cola cards look especially cheesy. Dextire's note cautioned me not to eat the gum inside.



Some Chinese Health Balls! A hilarious little Hot Wheels watch! Some batteries to use in my Little Animal phones or perhaps the mini-Genesis! And a bald eagle keychain, which is so patriotic it's wearing a fucking American flag DO-RAG. Amazing. The only thing missing is the single tear rolling down its face!

Thank you Dextire! This was a most amusing box of stuff! This definitely gets the Protoclown stamp of approval!

And now, here is my video of the Little Animal phone in action!